Saving You
by L.L.B.B
Summary: Mishca falls in love with a detective who calls himself Rue only to find out the hard way that he isn't who or what he says he is. Things are bound to get complicated when she has to work side by side with L! Slight BBxOC, LxOC mostly.
1. Prologue: The Nightmare

_**Disclaimer:**_ _This story includes material from Another Note and Deathnote, both the Manga and Anime. Later on there is a possibility that some material from the live action films will be used. Please note, that I do not own any of the aforementioned material(s) – all legal ownership and copyrights belong to the respective owners. No profit is being made from the writing of this fanfiction, it is solely written for the enjoyment of the author and her readers. _

_However, the original characters Mishca, Tatum and Cadyacce, and the events surrounding them (with the exception of either direct or indirect Deathnote material references) are my sole creations and therefore are my intellectual property._

_END LEGAL MUMBO JUMBO..._

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><p><strong>Prologue: The Nightmare<strong>

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><p>The computer chair wheels squeaked as she swayed her legs from side to side as she intently scrutinized two computer screens… one screen had a graph representing statistics of recent deaths and the other screen split between a report and a local news station website. She held her coffee mug in one hand while the other was fiddling with her pronounced lower lip. He watched her ever so quietly from the apartment entrance hallway, watching her as she scrunched her eyebrows together and swore. He could tell she was getting frustrated quickly with this case…. But was too amused to say anything quite yet. She mumbled under her breath before taking a sip of her coffee…<p>

"I know these murders are connected… but how to prove it… just one… let me see just one clue"

"ACH! This coffee is horrible… sugar… must have more sugar…"

She was then startled by a mechanical laugh to her right…

"More sugar? So I am influencing you…"

The tall man walked slowly over to where she sat, he slouched so you wouldn't even know he was about a foot taller than she. His unkempt black hair going in every which direction with the most prominent dark circles you'd ever imagine - he looked frightening to most, but she just smiled and whispered -

"More than you know Rue, more than you know.."

Moments later he was beside her, adding sugar packets to her coffee…

"NO RUE! Not that much! I'm not crazy like you… I don't want to drink slush!"

"Crazy? Hmm… some may think so, but no, more sugar will help you think you know… better for this case, don't you think?"

She paused… "Rue… thank you.. but… the way you drink coffee is just… sickening.."

"Very well then"

-flash-

It was dusk out, she was standing on the railing of the apartment balcony as it rained, watching as the clouds moved past.

"You know Mischa, I really hate when you do that."

She turned around slowly, "It's fine Rue, I love the rain and you know my balance is exceptional anyway –"

She was cut off, "That's not the point!" His face was pink, he was clearly upset.

"just… please, just come down from there"

She raised an eyebrow and smirked

"Rue? Is that a tinge of concern I hear? Never thought I'd see the day!"

He turned his head slightly as she jumped back down to the balcony platform. "Thank you for coming down" and walked away slowly.

"Wait Rue, I have something to show you on this case we're working on, I found something, we're really close now, I can feel it. I think we're only a few days away to bringing this guy to justice"

He looked back at her, smiled and whispered "hmph… faster than I calculated… fascinating. If L knew about you…" His face went dark as he lowered his eyes.

"What was that Rue?"

"hmm? Oh nothing… let me see what you've got"

-flash-

It was dark, the case they were working on together was complete. She could tell he was staring at her from the living room they made into their workspace - she was standing on the balcony again… He sighed… then she said softly -

"You know Rue, I'm going to miss you."

He paused and slowly walked towards her…

"You know Mischa, I have another case I need to plan for now, it's in LA… I know this may seem crazy to you… but would you care to join me?"

"You want me to come with you?"

-flash-

The LA city lights were pouring into the hotel room – Rue was sitting in an arm chair by the window, legs close to his chest with his fingers in a strawberry jam jar. She watched him for a moment, as much as she found that habit disgusting, seeing him so content made her smile -

-flash-

There were deep, harsh breathes, hands on skin, lips touching, the sweet taste of strawberry jam, it was all getting to be too much for her to take. She ran her fingers through his unruly hair as he sighed. It was too late for them now.

-flash-

"Mischa… I need to tell you… I'm not who you think I am." He advanced towards her, "I wasn't going to tell you, not ever, but recent events has shown me there's no getting around it. "

"Rue -"

"My name is Beyond Birthday, and it would be best if you let me speak."

- - - there was a pause, and then he continued.

"It seems that I have had the very unfortunate experience of falling in love with you… you must understand, this was never my intention, but as I have come to terms with, I can't let you go now. I know you have fallen for me as well, so I apologize for how hard it will be for you to hear what I have to say next – please don't fight me as I explain."

-flash-

Her mouth was agape, shaking her head in disbelief grasping for some sort of explanation – what had he just said to her?

"Beyond Birthday? What kind of name is that? You are crazy! How could you.. seriously? This is all a sick joke right? Who the hell is L? This isn't real, you wouldn't do –"

"You must understand, what I just told you is all very real, and no, I am not crazy. I am simply trying to prove that L is not infallible and I will win! You could help me you know… and we could be together that way, don't you see how logical this all is? "

"Let me get this straight – you aren't Rue… you actually are pretending to be this L person, had me fall in love with you as L, and now you want me to help murder innocent people to prove him wrong?"

"That about sums it up – yes, although the personal aspect between us caught me completely off guard, I did not see that one coming…."

"You ARE crazy! You really think I would ever help you now? This isn't logical, it's insane! You tricked me! I have no idea who you are – I don't love you, you made me fall in love with another man! How dare you ask me to help you in murdering people! If anything I'd rather help L in taking you down! You crazy son-of-a…"

-flash-

"You know Mishca, this could have all been avoided… but now it seems you've sided with L… and I just can't have that. You see….you could've been mine… but he gets everything… he always wins… and now… he's even won you without even doing a thing..."

The room was dark… his words were barely audible. Her vision was out of focus, she could feel the cold floor of the kitchen.

"Little angel of justice are we? Always have to be on the right side? … Seems you were never mine to begin with…. I should've known. I'll have to correct that. No need for L to ever discover your existence, but if he ever did… I could show him I won in a different way…"

His words trailed off and were making no sense to the half unconscious woman. She heard a metal scrapping sound on the ground… the sound vibrated into her ears and sent a chill down her back. She shivered as the blade reached her shirt – she could hear the cloth being ripped to shreds. She knew what was coming next.

"I'm sorry beautiful – if it wasn't for L, maybe…. Just maybe… but no, that's impossible now"

She felt the blade sink into her flesh and she screamed in terror –she was completely aware now. The pain was unbearable. He dragged the knife deep into her side, relentlessly repeating on the other side, then her back, bottom of her feet and her right forearm. She could feel him tearing her apart, she could feel the blade drawing something, should couldn't tell what, but she knew the cuts had a purpose. He kept cutting and cutting deep into her flesh…

"Please… please stop… you… yyy—yyouu don't have to.. to do this… pppplle-ppleassee" her voice was low, she was losing too much blood too fast, her eyelids were closing….

"Oh, but this is necessary… you can thank Lawliet for this"

She awoke with a start, sweat dropping from her face down to her shirt. It was all too real, a dream too vivid like it was happening all over again. She reached down to her ribs, feeling the scars he left behind wondering how she never saw the warning signs.


	2. Chapter 1: Connections

**Chapter 1: Connections**

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><p>She awoke with a start, sweat dropping from her face down to her shirt. It was all too real, a dream too vivid like it was happening all over again. She reached down to her ribs, feeling the scars he left behind wondering how she never saw the warning signs.<p>

She slowly pushed herself up, supporting herself with her arms while her head faced the ceiling. With closed eyes she took a few long deep breaths in an effort to calm her nerves. She tilted her head forward and moaned in irritation as she felt the sweat soaked sheets below her –

"These nightmares are killing me – will I ever get a normal night's sleep ever again?" She spoke to herself as she turned to see her alarm clock… July 1, 2002 2:30am. "Not even a full two hours of sleep, this can stop any time now…"

It had been months now since Mishca was rescued from the bloodstained apartment – she was hoping to have some closure on this by now – but her mind just wouldn't let it go. She shifted to the side of her bed, throwing her legs over the side lazily. She scanned the room, the moonlight made the room glow.

Her gaze stopped on a case file lying on her dresser. She quickly got up and paged through the thick document. It was all there - - everything he had said to her that night, every detail she could remember. He was deranged enough to think she would side with him after his explanation – what arrogance…

She flipped to a page labeled "A" scanning the page without really reading she caught the words "pressure" and "suicide" she kept flipping the pages, landing on a page that said "Whammy's House" she paused on this page, she remembered digging for information on this orphanage, it wasn't difficult to find in England, but getting anyone to give her a phone number besides the mainline was like pulling teeth and no one would give her the time of day there, they were locked up tight like they were protecting the most precious possession ever to exist. She kept flipping through the case file, and finally landed on "L" – there was nothing on the page besides the L and a big slash through the rest of the page. She deduced that it was more probable than not that BB had copied everything about L – right down to the way he bit his fingers - so it would be wise not to record any details about the greatest detective of the century – even if it could help, the danger it would cause wouldn't be worth it.

She sighed and walked to the bathroom, she removed her soaked clothing and started a bath. She was wondering when BB would put his plan into motion – he hadn't made a move since he told her that night – she wondered if it all was just a sick joke of a crazed maniac "no – he'll follow through with this and I'll be rearing and ready for him when he comes out of hiding…"

A few weeks later…

Mishca was sitting at her desk staring out the window at the LA skyline. Just moments before she had finished up yet another case – she got a hold of her contact and forwarded on the results – "another happy customer" she joked. Her phone rang…

"Mishca, it's Cadyacce, its best you make a second for this one"

"Alright then, go ahead"

"Remember when Tatum and I found you? Well, I don't know if you remember, but while you were heavily drugged at the hospital you mumbled things…weird things"

Bored, Mishca twirled in her chair - "I'm failing to see the relevance to this story Cadyacce, get on with it"

"Well, at the time I thought you were just drugged out of your mind and having a weird dream or something, but now I'm not so sure. That night in the hospital, you mumbled something about voodoo dolls, weird names and murder."

She stopped deadfast - "Did I?"

"Yes, well, like I said I thought you were just dreaming but…"

"But what Cadyacce?"

"Turn on the channel 11 news"

There was a pause as she reached for the remote – the TV clicked on and she flipped to the channel.

_Breaking news… man found dead…. Believe Bridesmaid…freelance writer,_ _Wara Ningyos found at scene…no sign of struggle, strangled to death…_

"Wara Ningyos?"

"Yea… they're used for voodoo Mischa… you want to tell me your connection to all of this? Please tell me you're not involved, I would have to take you in you know, I'm in the Bureau and no matter how talented you are, fourth greatest detective and all that, I would still have to -"

"Don't be absurd Cadyacce, I'm not involved in the killings and this isn't big enough for the FBI to pay much attention too."

"Then is this the same –"

"I have to go now, thanks for the heads up, I'm on it."

"But –"

CLICK

A few days passed -It didn't take long to get what information there was on this killing, her connections were strong, not as strong as L's, but she still had some pull with the agencies and police. She compiled her notes…

"Date of murder… July 31st… mm" She paused as she ate a strawberry from the fruit bowl sitting on her desk – swaying back and forth as always. "Well known free-lance writer.. lived alone in a small house… address… address…where is that… ahh here we are… Hollywood Insist Street…that's not that fair from here… hmmm…"

Mishca slipped on her sandals and ran out the door with her kit. She reached the house in record time. The police line tape was still up, one police car guarding the entrance. Mishca was about to turn off the radio and engine but paused as she heard a breaking news bulletin come over the speakers – "August 5th, 2002 , we have just learned of a murder that occurred yesterday, victim, 13 years old, Quarter Queen... victim unconscious at the time of death…"

She shut off the car and sat there. She knew it was him, she knew it. But a 13 year old? How could he go that far? "Bastard!" She punched the steering wheel.

"… I can't do this… too close… too close…" Her mind raced thinking back on how she swore she'd never let her emotions get in the way again…

"If I find him… will I be able to follow through with it?" She stared out the window, but saw nothing.

"I can't take that chance – this needs to be flawless…"

Feeling like a failure she reached for her cellphone and dialed a long distance number. It rang twice,

"Whammy's House, this is Roger"

"Connect me to Mr. Whammy please"

"Young lady, I'm afraid that's not possib –"

"The fuck it isn't! This is an emergency, connect me now!"

"May I ask who is –"

"Just connect me damnit! People are dying!"

- pause -

In a safe house somewhere, origins unknown, a cellphone rings.

"Yes?"

"Watari – this is Roger, I'm sorry for contacting you but there is a persistent young lady who won't stop until she speaks with you"

"… that is not advisable Roger, you should not have called"

"Understood – but she stated it was an emergency – something about people dying"

"Emergency?" Watari paused… What is this?

"Patch her through, if nothing else I need to confirm she is not a threat to him."

"Very well"

CLICK

"This is Watari, what may I ask is your name?"

"You may call me Mishca, but please, names are not important and we're short on time. What is important is what I am about to tell you. It's in regards to one of your 'orphans" B, I think you call him. Please listen carefully –"

Watari's eyes widened as he slowly closed his cell phone. Is this woman serious? B wouldn't murder… no, he wouldn't go that far, would he?

He walked quietly to the other room where his prodigy sat slouched in front of a computer screen. Dark hair covering his tired eyes – but focusing so intently in the screen before him.

"L – There has been some development in regards to B. He's in LA – seems he is involved in 2 recent murders there"

L cocked his head to the side -

"Is your source reliable? .. mm.." he popped a candy in his mouth "This could very well be a trap, mm" he popped another candy in his mouth "regardless… this could be my only chance… set up arrangements for us to go to LA, I will find someone to be my eyes – I can't do this without the assistance of a talented agent"

"Yes, of course, right away"


	3. Chapter 2: An Offer Hard to Refuse

Chapter 2: An Offer Hard to Refuse

She was sitting in the far corner of a deserted 24-hour café in New York City watching through the window as the rain drops fell – her icey blue eyes following each droplet as they hit the side of the window... It was December, so she was thankful it wasn't snowing just yet. The warm sensation coming from the coffee mug soothed her hands. She found herself coming to this café when she couldn't sleep – which was quite often. She'd been living in NYC for about a year now, trying to live another life… one without cases and puzzles… it was boring. There wasn't anything as exciting as the puzzles she could solve… cases were intriguing… this life was… dull. She sighed as she stared down at her mug, stirring in more sugar and cream. How she wished to solve another case… just one, but she wouldn't let herself. Her last 'case' left her feeling raw… she lost. Her cheeks flushed as she remembered having to hand over the case to someone else… how embarrassing. She didn't think of herself as such a hopeless romantic… someone who could be blinded by love so easily… she snickered and thought," at least, what I thought was love anyway".

Her chocolate brown hair fell loosely around her face, a few strands fell in front of her eyes, she quickly wiped them to the side and looked back out the window. She thought to herself, how easy it would be, to just pick up right where she left off _– I still have requests for cases pouring in_… she sighed again… they were getting harder to ignore, she wanted to at least look at them just once… She shook her head from side to side and spoke softly "leave it alone…"

"Excuse me, Miss?"

Mischa looked up at the man standing beside her table, he was a tall attractive man, green eyes, blonde hair and well built.

"Tatum!" She smiled, the first real smile in a long time. She stood up and hugged him "How have you been?"

"Not bad, not bad, I heard you were in NYC, was hoping I'd run into you while I was here. How goes the normal life?"

"Oh, you know.." Dismissing the question. She waved her hand, motioning for him to sit down but did not get the reaction she expected. Instead he grabbed her arms and looked down at each in anger.

"What happened here?" He motioned to the red marks that circled her arms. "It's nothing" she said as she slipped back into her zip up hoodie so he'd stop staring. They both sat, and he whispered…

"Mishca… please tell me you've been keeping those scars hidden – your life is just as important as his"

She was offended. "Let it go. It's the price I pay for knowing too much, and besides, it's not like it was intentional – I got away alive didn't I? Stop worrying so much about me… why are you here anyway?" She took a long sip of her coffee.

"Actually, I'm getting ready to go to the airport. I'm supposed to fly to Japan, some big ICPO meeting about all those crazy deaths that have been happening lately ."

Mishca stared at him eyes wide, lips now further away from the rim of the cup, "are you speaking of the recent criminal deaths? The ones all linked to heart attacks?"

"That's the one. But your retired now right, you wouldn't be interested in a case like that…" He was toying with her now.

"Retired? Mm. I'm only 22, you're making me feel old… tell me more about this meeting?"

"Ahh, you should know I can't talk about it. Hey, why don't you come with us? How cool would it be,–I've always wanted to work on a case with you.. I can't believe I know one of the greatest detectives of our time and I haven't worked on a case with you yet!"

"Erm.. I'm not working in that field anymore – even if I was, I'm not a great detective and you really have to keep quiet about my identity – only you and Cadyacce know, keep it that way…. Just leave it at that, I was simply curious about this case…" she trailed off.

"Nonsense, what else are you going to do? Go shopping? Sit here and drink some more coffee? Come on, you know you want to go! Seriously, you would be of great help to us too, you should really come to Japan.."

"No…no I don't think I will be doing that"

"Mishca, come on, one last big case to sink your teeth into. What do you say? And hey, it's just one meeting, nothing will probably come out of it, just the head honchos trying to figure out how to deal with this possible serial killer… at least come and give us some pointers… it's just one meeting"

There was a long time before they spoke again…

Her curiosity and hunger for a good case was getting the best of her, one little taste couldn't harm anything… could it?

"…. Just one meeting….?"

"I knew it! Fantastic! Come on, let's get to the airport then."

_**Sorry It's so short – next couple should be longer! Please review- it would be nice to know if anyones reading this at all - - hope the story doesn't suck too bad so far. **_


	4. Chapter 3: A Bad Idea

Chapter 3: A Bad Idea

The last thing she remembered was swearing at him, saying she'd gladly take him down. "Son-of-a-…" she fell to the floor in one fluid motion; she hadn't expected him to hit her. Yet another miscalculation on her part. Her eyes lifted slowly, just enough of a slit to peak a glimpse of her current situation. It was nighttime, the moonlight cast a ghoulish glow on the apartment. Shadows from the tree branches outside formed a twisted maze upon the face of the man sitting crouched like a child in the corner of the kitchen. The shadows made him look gruesome. The apartment was dead silent… all except for the intermittent creaks and scraps of a metal object hitting the linoleum. She struggled to comprehend the scene…the calm moonlight that penetrated the darkness in thin threaded rays seemed so misleading. All was not calm here – to the contrary, it was pure chaos. She saw him crawl towards her as he realized she had gained consciousness. It seemed he wanted her alert enough to watch whatever he had planned. He dragged the blade across the floor... She shivered as the blade reached her shirt – she could hear the cloth being ripped to shreds. She knew what was coming next. "I'm sorry beautiful – if it wasn't for L, maybe…. Just maybe… but no, that's impossible now" He cut into her until she pleaded for him to stop… she fell unconscious shortly afterwards.

-flash-

She awoke in a puddle of her own blood, struggling to put the pieces together she went over the events in her foggy head. She looked down at what was now engraved into her flesh and cried, she didn't understand how she survived it. She tried to stand but quickly fell, forgetting he had cut into the bottom of her feet. She reached out her left arm in hopes to pull herself up, and then she reached her right… a bloody strain of letters carved into her forearm came into sight, she couldn't make it out, there was too much blood covering it.. she wiped away the red matter with her other hand.. she could make out Law… but needed to wipe her arm again to be able to see the entire word… but only it wasn't a word… her eyes widened and she recalled him saying "… You can thank Lawliet for this"… she could only deduce this was the name of L – the man Rue… Beyond Birthday said was known as the greatest detective… "No no no… I shouldn't know this, this can't be real. This is so dangerous if it's real…" she moaned in agony as she forced herself up, she limped her way to the refrigerator and used the counters to shimmy herself over to the stove… "have to.. destroy… ahhh" she reached the stove, her bloody footprints could be seen behind her, she turned the front burner on at full blast and extended her arm over the fire… the flames scorched her skin as she screamed…

"Mischa, Mishca!" She awoke to someone shaking her "ahh what, what is it?" She woke in a start and almost jolted right out of her seat… she looked around and saw rows of seating and a flight attendant… she was on a plane.. she reclined in her chair, unknowingly reaching for her right forearm and rubbing the scarred burned area as she calmed down…ah, that's right, she thought, Japan…..

"Mishca!" Tatum waved his hands in front of her face "Helllo! Are you all right?"

"Hmm? Oh yes, fine, I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

"You were tossing and turning, you just about woke everyone up with your antics –"

"Sorry, it was just a nightmare… nothing serious"

"Well, what was it about?"

She whispered.."The same thing it's always about…."

"Mishca, you told me those night mares stopped a long time ago"

She snickered, "Yes, well… I lied."

"They never went away did they"

She shook her head no.

"Damnit it Mish –"

He was cut off by the loudspeaker, the plane was getting ready to land.

"Finally!" The other team members breathed as they stretched from their chairs.

The plane landed smoothly and the team exited. "So, when does this meeting begin?" Mishca directed her question to the Chief, "Should begin in an hour, gives us enough time to get there and hopefully find some coffee!"

"Amen to that!" she replied. Tatum slowly dragging behind, fuming that his friend had lied to him.

- A G8 Summit… A meeting of the ICPO -

Mishca surveyed the room, it was a tight squeeze, everyone was here… she sat next to Tatum in the middle section of the room, from there it was easy to see just about everyone without too much trouble.

_Fifty-two in the past week, and that's just those we know about!_

_Every single one from cardiac arrest_

_We may assume that more wanted criminals are dead as we speak!_

_But they are all criminals; don't they deserve to die anyway?_

_Who said that? That is completely…._

Mishca watched everyone fight… it looked like Tatum was right, nothing much was sure to come of this meeting…

_This could have been orchestrated by the CIA! No, the FBI!_

_Hey now wait a minute!_

Mishca heard one of the Bureau's team members defend their organization. This was getting out of hand, it had turned into an all out "you did it, no you did it!" festival. "Ridiculous" Mishca said under her breathe as she shook her head. It was unbelievable how the ICPO was acting, completely childish. She rolled her eyes and took a sip of her coffee.

_I think we have no other choice; this is another one for L_

_But he only takes cases he's interested in! _

_We don't even know how to get a hold of him!_

_Gentleman, L is already on the case._

_Watari?_

Mishca heard the Japanese Chief mention a familiar name… she almost spewed her coffee everywhere. Her mouth dropped slightly after forcing the hot liquid down. She couldn't make a scene, but she would have never agreed to come if she knew Watari would present himself. She flashed back to the conversation they had over a year ago… "How do I know I can trust you?" He had asked… "You don't". Her mind focused on past events as her eyes searched for the nearest exit. 'No… best not to leave early, that wouldn't exactly look great on my part, now would it', she thought to herself.

She returned her attention to the front of the room, by now Watari had set up speakers and a laptop with the famous "L" on the screen. She pulled her arms around herself, paying careful attention to lay her hand on her right ribcage. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, "This is bad" she said quietly, knowing none other than L himself was about to address the ICPO… 'I chose the wrong case to get interested in… this is getting more dangerous by the second.. what a bad idea!'.

_Good afternoon, this is L, the case before us is unprecedented in scope and difficulty and is a monstrous crime of mass murder that must be stopped at all costs!_

She sat there in pure shock and amazement. The meeting quickly came to a close and she was the first to stand… "Mishca? Won't you wait a second?" "Mm no, I'm sorry, I'm afraid I'm not feeling well. I will meet you downstairs in 10." "Well, alright then".

She rushed to the ladies room on a lower floor and turned the sink faucet on full blast cold. She cupped the water in her hands and splashed her face, letting the water droplets run down and cool her head. She kept her wrists under the running water in an effort to cool the rest of her body. She had gotten herself worked up and overheated –"God, am I glad to be out of there!" She thought about what had just happened - L had asked for the assistance of the Japanese police force, he didn't request any other help – she assumed her and the team would fly back to the states in the morning.

After cooling down, Mishca dried off and left for the main entrance way. The FBI team chief greeted her as she walked closer. "Mishca, here, this is the hotel we are all staying at" he handed her a business card, "I took the liberty of booking you a separate room, a lady needs her privacy after all right?" he laughed.

"Ugh…yes, thank you for that sir. Has Tatum come down yet?"

"No, I'm afraid he may be a while. He was talking with the Japanese police force when I left."

"Well, I think I will just go straight to the hotel then. That jetlag is killing me, I could really use some sleep."

"Very well, see you in the morning!"

"Yes sir, have a good night" she said as she waved and walked out the doors.

She laughed, the hotel he mentioned was right down the road ,she could see it from the doorway where she stood. "Well, at least I won't get lost." She began walking towards the hotel "I wonder what Tatum and the Japanese police force are discussing? Eh, never mind that, I'm sure he'll fill me in on the plane ride back to New York tomorrow."


	5. Chapter 4: Stuck

**_OK so now we get started into the Deathnote portion of the story - yay! Actual Mishca/L encounter doesn't happen quite yet...It is coming though, promise!_**

Chapter 4: Stuck

It was morning, Mishca had been up for hours already – it didn't matter what she did, she either had nightmares that woke her up just hours into her sleep, or she couldn't fall asleep to begin with, even with sleep aides and regardless of how tired she really was. It was useless – she was turning into a grade A Insomniac. She was lucky enough that her makeup did a good job of hiding her tired eyes.

She was leaning over the window ledge looking at the view – she was a bit disappointed that her room didn't have a balcony – so the window ledge would have to do for now.

Suddenly, there was a knock at her door. She slowly turned and walked towards it, looking through the peep hole she could see it was Tatum. She opened the door and let him enter.

"Morning, did you sleep at all?"

"Bout an hour or so –"

He pushed past her into the room.

"What was with you yesterday? You didn't say a word – I thought you would have had something to say about what happened at the meeting – or at least add something of significance to it"

"Like I said – I wasn't feeling well, besides, all the fighting back and forth was enough to get me disinterested –I expected them to at least be civil with one another, but I guess that was too much to ask for." She didn't want to discuss the discomfort she had felt with Watari's and L's presence, even if the latter was talking through a computer – Tatum only knew that she had some indirect connection with L but didn't know any specifics and she aimed to keep it that way. She was hoping this explanation would satisfy his curiosity.

She walked towards the bed and sat down.

"Anyway – I spent a good amount of time talking with the Japanese police force – they don't see any connection between the deaths besides the heart attacks – the deaths are from all around the world so I was trying to figure out why L had requested their help instead of ours and we couldn't figure it out –you have any theories?"

"…You mean you really don't know?"

He looked out the window – he hated when she made him feel stupid, whether she did it intentionally or not.

"If you look back at the series of deaths you'll see that the first reported casualties were all in Japan – this is where it all began. Don't you remember the Shinjuku killer? It's only logical to base the investigation here – the next piece is to find the region in Japan were this Kira is. That shouldn't be difficult now that L's on the case though."

"Amazing – I guess I shouldn't be shocked that you caught that though... I knew you were keeping tabs on this case all along... you just can't resist, it's too juicy"

"I suppose... there is some truth to that. Anyway, I wanted to ask you Tatum –"

"What's that?"

"What did you tell your chief about me? How did you get him to agree to let me come to such a meeting in the first place? You didn't tell him who I was –"

"Of course not! He thinks you're just some intern that was transferred who's trying to get her feet wet – said this would be a good experience for you."

"He really fell for that line of bull? And since when do they let interns attend those meetings? Man, the FBI's really grasping for straws if they couldn't see through that…"

"Yea well… I submitted all the appropriate paperwork so you'd be on file as an intern so… it was more believable than you may think"

"You mean you forged documents…. And when did you find the time to do that?"

*Cough* "Umm…erm… I.. sort of, preempted your decision and filed it earlier in the week…"

"So you knew all along I was in NYC and would say yes… nice. Better watch out, Kira might get you for your little illegal stunt" She smirked.

"Very funny – but I knew you'd come, I mean, how could you resist? And how else was I going to get clearance for you without telling anyone who you really are?"

"Right…." "So… moving on, when's our flight leave?"

"…." He looked away and shifted his footing …

"Tatum… we ARE leaving, right?"

"Uhh…yes… of course we are.. it's just that…um…" his voice lowered… "it's not going to be today…"

"What do you mean, not today?" She raised her voice; she couldn't stay here any longer, it was too dangerous

"Well, I, uh, sort of, um…" He was stuttering now… "… convinced the chief to agree to letting us stay and the Japanese police welcomes our help and…"

"You did what! Where's the chief, I want to talk to him!"

"Umm.. 'fraid he's already on the flight back to the states…"

She sprang up from the bed, "You have GOT to be kidding me Tatum! I agreed to one meeting, ONE! No where in our conversation did I say I'd help the Japanese police force with their investigation!"

"Yes, well… I thought you'd be interested in getting your hands a little dirty on this one… and besides, you don't really have much of a choice, they are expecting us at HQ in an hour… and when I mentioned it to the Chief… he said he really wanted some of his people there to keep an eye on things so…. We're sort of… stuck now, I guess?"

" You guess? …. My god Tatum… what have you done?" She whispered… he truly had no idea how dangerous this was for her… for L… for the entire investigation…

"My presence will only complicate things Tatum, I really wish you would have spoken to me first before jumping in head first…"

"Nonsense, they need you! You can see things other people can't, this will be great!" His excitement shown through like a little boy who just got his first bike…

An hour later HQ

Mishca and Tatum walked through the security check point… she couldn't believe what she had gotten herself into… she swore at herself, knowing she should have stayed in NY. They entered the conference room, it was full of work tables covered in paperwork, a large presentation screen could be seen in the front of the room. As they entered, an overly- excited man stood up and waved to them "Tatum, over here!"

"Hey, that's one of the guys I spoke with yesterday." Tatum whispered to Mishca. As they sat down each member introduced themselves to Mishca and brought her up to speed.

"So, Mishca, what do you think he meant by a direct confrontation?"

"I can only assume he's going to address Kira…"

Moments later, Lind L. Taylor was visible on the front screen.

_I am Lind L Taylor, more commonly known as L – the sole person able to mobilize police in every country worldwide._

Mishca grinned from ear to ear, knowing this wasn't him… 'so this is the play he's using? Bravo L, bravo…'

"What are you smirking about Mishca? This is hardly amusing!"

She looked at Tatum out of the corner of her eyes and mouthed "Just watch" knowing she couldn't say she had a rough idea what the real L actually looked like.

_Kira, I think I've got a pretty good idea of why you are doing this. But what you are doing is EVIL!_

Mishca couldn't stop grinning – this was perfect. He hit it right on the nail – not that she expected anything less, but she couldn't help but be in awe as she watched him do what he does best. Kira was killing criminals, cleansing the world of evil so to speak… calling him evil in return… that was sure to get a reaction out of Kira. 'stop grinning like a maniac Mishca, you'll draw attention to yourself…' she had to remind herself that no one else in the room knew what was really taking place right in front of their eyes.

Moments later, Lind L. Taylor was hunched over his desk. He had been killed… by none other than a heart attack. Mishca's mouth dropped a little, how did he manage to kill him without even being there?

Seconds later, the famous L shown on the screen.

_I don't believe it, this was an experiment to test a hunch I had… bit I never really thought… Kira, you can actually kill people without direct contact_

"Unbelievable…" She whispered, she quickly surveyed the room, everyone was staring at the screen in pure shock.

L went on to explain that the man really was an inmate on death row - it wasn't really him.

_But I, L, do in fact exist. So, come on! Kill me if you can! What are you waiting for?_

…_. So, there are people you can't kill, that's a valuable clue. I should also tell you, although this was announced as a global broadcast, it was really only broadcasted in the Kanto region around Tokyo… You are in the Kanto region of Japan, Kira. And although the police missed this, your first victim was the Shinjuku killer who took 8 people hostage…_

"Hey, that's what you said Mishca!" Tatum said loud enough for the surrounding team members to hear. One of them turned around"How did you catch that?" An older gentleman smacked his shoulder with a rolled up paper "Matsuda, pay attention this is no time for games!" … "Yes, sir…"

At the end of the meeting, Mishca stood, not wanting to be involved in the gossip and small talk that was bound to ensue. "I'm going to get some coffee down the street Tatum, I'll see you later." Tatum was already in a heavy discussion with Matsuda and just waved her goodbye. 'Seems those two are friends all ready.. geeshh'

She began walking towards the exit, "Excuse me, miss?" She turned around to see the older gentleman from earlier. "Yes?"

"I'm Chief Yagami, head of this investigation."

"It's very nice to meet you Chief, what can I do for you?"

"I couldn't help but overhear your colleague mention you had already deduced that the Shinjuku killer was the first Kira killing. I was hoping to speak to you about the case, no one so far has any different insight, but it seems you may have a different angle. Care if I join you in your coffee break?"

"Not at all, anything to help."

Tatum was right, she was stuck now, but if she truly was stuck, she was going to put everything she had into the case and bring this bastard down. Everything should be fine as long as it stays the way it is… with the only interaction with L being through a computer screen…any closer was completely out of the question.

The two walked together to the small cafe down the street as they bounced ideas of off each other, hoping to find another clue.

**_If you haven't noticed, I tried to make Tatum a bit like Matsuda. Immature and quick to act without thinking all the way through – thought this was a good match, Matsuda needs a friend!_**

**_And yes, I know some of you are probably thinking that she could just leave - she most likely could BUT I'm trying to show that she has a heart and doesn't want to leave her friend hanging even though he royally ticked her off and also to show that she is selfish (whether she wants to admit it or not, she wants to stay) - character flaws are a must!_**

**_Please review! Let me know what you think!_**


	6. Chapter 5: Waste of Time

Yay I got a review and some favs/alerts… woo hoo! So the story isn't too horrible then? I hope you guys stick it out to the end, Mishca and L encounter is coming super soon! (YYYYAAYY!)

BTW you pronounce Mishca as MEE-sshh-ka

3

Three days later…

The curtains rippled as the howling wind raged through the open windows of the hotel suite. The air made the sheets cool to her touch. She shivered as the man next to her maneuvered closer to her; his movement dragged the sheets across her skin lightly, causing a chill to surge throughout her body. Moments later she could feel hot breath on her neck. "This is dangerous… you and I…" the voice breathed. She only sighed and tilted her head so it'd lay on his, her hand found its way to the man's chest, the white fabric was soft and smooth to her touch. "But… I presume you already recognized that danger, albeit unknowing what the danger truly is…"

She sat up slowly, putting her head in her hand while he removed himself from her side and turned his back to her. "Riddles… always with the mystery. I feel completely safe with you Rue, I don't know what you're speaking of" she smiled, sure he was playing one of his games.

He stood slowly and walked towards the doorway and quietly whispered to himself, not expecting her to hear "Then that will certainly be the death of you…"

He shut the door behind him and she was left in utter confusion. No one had ever been so difficult to crack before, so difficult to understand. She knew this was a large reason for her attraction. She began thinking if she should be uneasy about him but quickly dismissed it all as just a ruse.

She got up from the bed and made her way to the shower, shivering as the cold breeze blew across her skin. She cursed herself for only wearing a thin tank top and a pair of girl boxers to bed. She started the shower and brushed her hair out as she waited for it to get to just the right temperature. Finally, she enters the shower once she sees hot steam rising from the water. The hot water warmed her frozen body quickly.

Scenes from earlier played through her mind as she ran her fingers through her hair. They had been together for hours, just talking about normal things. She smirked to herself, the events seemed foreign to her, she had never thought he would have any normal conversations, least of all with her. He had actually laid down with her, let her get close – she was astonished at how the relationship had progressed. It made her pleased, it felt like she had accomplished a great feat, a feeling she usually only felt after cracking a case.

She was thinking to herself how wonderful it was to find another detective who was so intriguing when her thoughts were interrupted by a sharp pain in her right forearm. It hurt like nothing she'd ever felt before. She screamed in pain and glanced at where the burning sensation was coming from. Water and blood started falling together to the white shower floor beneath her as she watched as letters began carving themselves into her arm as if by an invisible hand. She cried out horrified and fell to her knees, grasping at her forearm with her left hand trying to prevent any more bleeding. She cried and screamed until finally….

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*

Shocked from the noise, Mishca sprang from her bed drenched in sweat. She moaned. She hated when her dreams showed her what she had thought were good memories, tarnishing them with the emphasize on the true realities. Those were the worst… she'd rather the strictly physically painful nightmare over the emotional ones that showed her just how much of a fool she really had been.

She soon found where the noise was coming from – her cellphone was lying on the floor beside the bed she had soaked in sweat. She must have knocked it off the night stand sometime during her nap –

She reached for it and noticed the text message from Tatum, it simply read "HQ, 30min".

"Great." She sighed heavily and ran to the shower to get rid of the recent nightmares aftermath.

HQ

Mishca paced the room as a team member broke the news to Chief Yagami… 23 new deaths, occurring exactly one hour from each other. Other team members were staring at her, she assumed it was because she wouldn't stop moving… but she couldn't help it, she thought better while she moved around, whether it be swaying in a chair or pacing a room, she had to move, get the juices flowing, more ideas came to her and more clues become evident when she's in motion.

"two days in a row, and both of those were week days…"

"Come on, any one could skip a few days of school!"

Mishca couldn't believe that the team missed the fact that they just spoke about the possibility of a student being KIRA… and now, all of a sudden, the times are so close together?

"THAT ISN'T IT!" L's mechanical voice came through the computer speakers.

"L is right, this seems to… convenient, intentional even…" Mishca got glares from some in the room, most of which she didn't recognize. Only a select few decided to introduce themselves to her originally, the others seemed to be furious that two Americans were even in the same room with them. FBI vs Japanese police… there was no competition in her eyes, being that she was neither, but she was positive that the others were none too happy about the FBI being here at all.

There was a pause on L's line, she was certain he heard her and had made some conclusion. She hoped she was wrong, she wanted to stay as anonymous as possible. – but her big mouth was not helping her here.

"…. It's true he may not be a student, but that is not what KIRA is telling us… what he is saying, is that he is free to choose the time of death as he pleases… and another thing which I cannot ignore, he has somehow gained access to information only the police have!"

Tatum walked over to Mishca and whispered, "What do you think?"

"He's right. Like I said, just doesn't seem right."

The room erupted, they didn't believe that KIRA could get inside information – there was no way.

As everyone discussed their reasoning, Mishca noticed Watari disappear outside with his cellphone. It seemed odd for him to be pulled out of the meeting like that, it had never happened before. She was tempted to follow, but knew it was pointless and would only draw suspicion to herself. She thought for a moment…. it had to be L… had to be something he didn't want us to hear, that's the only explanation there could possibly be.

"Why are you so focused on the door?" She heard Tatum whisper to her.

"You didn't notice?"

"Notice what?"

She sighed. Was everyone in this room completely oblivious to everything that was going on? She was getting fed up by the lack of experience and know how, she couldn't help but think they were all just going to slow L down. "Watari just left, important phone call I presume… a very significant phone call I'm sure."

"Umm.. Okay, and what is that supposed to mean?"

"Fine, I'll give you a few bread crumbs, we just found out that information is possibly being leaked, if you were L, what would you do?"

He looked dumbfounded.

She wanted to bash her head into a wall. She couldn't be the only one that saw these things, besides L of course and the other great detectives would surely see it too if they were on the case, but this wasn't that hard to follow, was it? Basic detectives and police force should see these things, right? She couldn't place herself in their shoes.

Tatum just walked away shaking his head, "And you thought we could get by without you. Told you, you see things other people can't"

She hated the words he spoke, she wanted to just shout that it isn't that hard! What she saw was easy to deduce if you just look… you just have to look.

…

A few days later Mishca watched as team member after team member resigned from the KIRA case. Trust in L was waning and fear for their own lives was increasing tenfold. The constant murders were hanging heavy on everyone's mind, any one of them could be next, couldn't they?

Mishca's thoughts were interrupted by Chief Yagami, it seems that there were six more prisoner deaths, some with unusual circumstances. Mishca watched as three documents popped up on the computer screen. Two photos, one of a man face down in a men's restroom, the other a star symbol painted in blood on a cell wall. The last photo was a letter written in Japanese –

"Matsuda?"

"uuhh… ?" Matsuda turned around with a little red showing in his cheeks; Mishca dismissed the reaction and continued.

"I'm afraid I can't read Japanese, could you tell me what that letter says?"

"OH! That's right, American, umm… hehe… it says uh…"

"Wait, read it line by line. Slowly."

"Um, yea, ok. Lord have mercy is the first line. Second is, do what I can, I'll either be hanged or you know it, killed by Kira, I … and the final line, know about him. He's going to get me."

Mishca wrote down the words quickly, "Great, Thanks Matsu"

Matsuda smiled, "Matsu? Cool… yea, I like that…"

She rolled her eyes, god this man was like Tatum. So silly. She began reviewing the lines to pick them apart.

"What do you think?" Tatum asked her quietly as he leaned over the chair next to her.

"I can't help but think KIRA is playing with his victims now… no, not playing… he is… testing something…" she whispered.

Moments later L said the same thing about testing victims to the team members –

Mishca sighed, "see Tatum, I'm not needed here. I'm just coming to the same conclusions as he is… this is a waste of our time"

…

I hope you liked it. I'm trying to get the story moving a little faster, but I'm trying to follow it as close to the timeline as I can – I don't want to rush it too much. Please review/favorite/alert… something to let me know you are reading and like the story.


	7. Chapter 6: Line of Fire

Chapter 6: Line of Fire

A few days later …

Mishca was headed back to headquarters after her lunch break. She needed a break from everyone there, morale was definitely not high and it seemed so stuffy that it was hard to breathe. Even though it was lightly snowing, she decided to walk there instead of grabbing a taxi - she had gone to a cute café that was about a 30 min walk away from HQ – she knew she took too much time to go there, but she didn't care, damn it, she needed a break from these people.

Hopefully the extra time to herself and the fresh air would give her a few moments to practice Japanese characters in her head… she didn't think not being able to read Japanese would be an issue, it was easy enough for her to understand and to speak, but she never had the time to sit down and study the Japanese characters. She was angry with herself that she did not find the time, even angrier when she recalled Tatum calling her one of the greatest detectives… a great detective would not be this ill equipped for an investigation, she thought. She tried to push the irritation aside, but failed.

She was still a good fifteen minutes away from HQ when her phone rang, looking at the cellphone she saw that it was a private number. Curious, she answered.

"Yes?"

– she did not expect the robotic voice that came next

"Forgive the intrusion, but there is an urgent matter I must discuss with you … This is L"

She stopped in her tracks, L… was calling her? She couldn't believe it, a wave of panic crossed her face, minimal interaction through a computer was just fine… but this... this was too close… he shouldn't be calling her… wait, why the hell is he calling her? She thought, and whispered the only thing she could muster in her muddled head..

"… and how do I know you are… you've given me nothing to go on, for all I know you could be KIRA with a nifty voice distorter"

She could hear a faint release of air from the receiver; she had gathered he was amused by her response.

"Very good – yet another reason why we must speak"

"If you truly are L, I'm sure you are aware how dangerous contacting any of us directly is for you – for your sake, please make it quick."

She waited for what seemed like forever for him to continue…

"You will be receiving a call soon from the FBI telling you that your work here is complete and not to return to HQ…."

Thank god, Mishca thought. 'Maybe I can get out of here before things get even worse.'

"…what I ask, is that you consider remaining on the task force of your own accord."

All relief that washed over her seconds before was gone. She was quiet as she walked slowly towards a bench near a store. She sat, paying careful mind to what and who was around her. L, was asking her specifically, to stay. What a way to stay anonymous Mishca, way to go, she scolded herself in her mind.

"…. I will take your silence as careful consideration. Please come to a decision on my request quickly, and if you decide to stay, please get back to HQ as quickly as possible."

The phone clicked signaling to her that he hung up. She slowly removed her phone from her ear.

'What would it look like, if I refused to go back to HQ? Why does the FBI want to pull out of this investigation?'

Her head was spinning with questions – she needed answers, and she needed them now. She sprang up and began walking towards HQ, mind racing. 'L asked me specifically to stay on the task force… damn it, he must have heard everything I've been saying. Who was I kidding, he's L, of course he's going to hear everything… uughhhh…. Does that mean he values my deductions? Or does he know… no, that's impossible.. he must want to utilize my deduction capabilities, but why? I haven't came to any conclusions that he hasn't come to himself, I'm useless… ugghhh!' She was so caught up in her own thoughts that she didn't hear her cellphone ring again.

She finally reached HQ and rushed to the conference room. Upon entering she saw Tatum in a shouting match with a few Japanese police members, their faces were red and most were waving their arms around.

"You FBI, I knew you weren't here to help! Have you been probing us too all along? Huh?"

Mishca ran over to break up the fight, "STOP! Real professional guys, get off his back!"

"I don't want to hear anything from you, you're one of them! For all I know you were probing us all as well!"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Uh.. uh… guys.." they could hear Matsuda in the background trying to get their attention, but it was no use, until finally…

"THAT IS ENOUGH!" A loud robotic voice came over the speakers. The room fell to silence and the police members who were in Tatum's face backed away.

"Tatum and Mishca were not involved in the FBI probe…"

"YEAH!" Tatum shouted at the police force, "If we were, don't you think we'd be one of the 12 that died! We're still here, geniuses!"

Mishca glared at Tatum "That's quite enough Tatum, drop it. L is trying to say something" Her mind was reeling, so she was right. L did have the police force investigated… but why did he use the FBI… he could have used a different organization. She could only deduce that he wanted to see how her and Tatum handled themselves if word did get out. 'I wonder what L would think, once he realizes I'm not FBI?'

"… I think that is enough for today, L." Chief Yagami spoke up, "I think it wise for everyone here to spend a night with their families, away from all of this."

"… Indeed, very well then. Please meet back here tomorrow at the normal time.." The computer screen went black, it was hard to hear his true meaning through the robotic voice, but Mishca could tell he was none too pleased.

Team members starting piling out of the room, most giving Mishca and Tatum harsh glares and some swore at them out of anger.

At the hotel …

"So, I guess we're headed back to the states now, like you wanted Mishca." Tatum said as they entered the hotel lobby.

"… no. I'm truly stuck now Tatum, I'm not going anywhere."

"What do you mean? The FBI director wants us back, the FBI is through with this investigation."

"Well, then I guess I will see you whenever the case is over."

"Will you please let me in on what you are talking about?"

She sighed as she reached the elevator doors, and pressed the up button. "I'm not one of you Tatum, I don't have the same constraints that you do."

The doors slid open and they entered the elevator, thankfully, no one else was occupying it. "Even so, everyone thinks you are, so you have to come back."

The elevator reached her floor and the stepped out and she reached for the door key in her purse.

"No – that won't be happening…" She slid the key card into the slot in the door and walked into her room, Tatum following closely behind.

Tatum looked at her confused.

"I received a call this morning, letting me know that the FBI was pulling us out"

"Yea, so did I"

"I doubt you received the call from the same person as I did." She said as she sat in a chair and removed her shoes.

"Huh?"

"L has asked me to stay on the case Tatum. I won't be returning to the States just yet."

Tatum looked at her with his mouth dropped and eyes wide. "L… contacted… you?" "Holy cow that is so cool! You must have really impressed him!"

Mishca placed her shoes near the door and got up to start a pot of coffee. "Impressed? Doubtful – I expect that's not an easy feat. And how is any of this 'cool'?"

"Yeah. Well it sort of is, I mean, L, greatest detective in the world contacts you… hey, do you think he knows you used to be the 4th greatest?"

She was about to pour the water into the coffee machine but paused at his question, and cringed at his use of the phrase 'used to be' – she didn't like that. "I don't think so.. but, that will surely change if I continue working on this case. It is bound to come to the surface at some point."

"Didn't you say it was too dangerous to even come here, and now you are staying? How does that make any sense anyway?"

"Don't you see? … L has obviously heard all of my deductions and thoughts so far on this case, everything that I've done up to this point shows that I am determined to catch KIRA at any cost, how would it look to him, if I were to all of a sudden up and leave just because I was told to?"

"Like you were following your orders"

"Mm. Not quite." She poured the water into the machine and pressed the on button.

"He, and anyone else for that matter, can see how interested I am in this case. There's no way he would look at it as me just following orders. It would look suspicious if I didn't put up a fight, if I didn't want to stay… I would surely be next on his list to investigate."

"I don't follow your train of thought on that one Mishca, how do you know he'd think that?"

"Because it's what I would think. If I just up and leave, it would look like I'm hiding something – why would someone so interested in the case and so eager to solve it, just leave?" She shook her head "it doesn't look good for me, whether I stay or leave. At least if I stay, I have some control over what information he gets on me."

The coffee finished brewing and she poured two cups. She walked towards the sitting area

"In order to completely protect what I know, I have to put myself in the line of fire. I know it makes no sense to you, but it's what needs to be done."

She handed Tatum his cup. Before she could even sit down she saw a huge grin on Tatum's face.

"Hey Mishca… do you think there's any way I could stay too?"

She raised an eyebrow, "What happened to following orders? If you stay you will surely lose your position with the FBI."

"… I don't care. If we solve it, they'll want me back anyway – and there's no way I'm leaving you here by yourself."

….

Next Chapter L meets everyone! YAAYY!

And I'm sorry if there is any OOC-ness, This is my first FF so I'm sure there will be a lot. I'll do my best but L is a tough one to write!

Glad you guys like it so far! I'm super excited about where this story is going….


	8. Chapter 7: A Valuable Asset

Chapter 7: A Valuable Asset

*The chapter is in L's pov (OMG YAY!... ahem..erm.. sorry…), going back a week and then through the day after chapter 6 Please don't kill me if there is OOC-ness, first FF! And I had to move the official face-to-face meeting another chapter away, I didn't realize how long this one was going to be! It should be uploaded shortly after this one though, so you won't have to wait!

At an undisclosed area… a week ago

"L, Do you know?" He said aloud softly, as if saying the words again would present some other meaning, a clue even, but there was nothing. He stared at the wall in front of him, trying to decipher what KIRA would possibly be trying to convey… only if he had the second part to the message…

BIP BIP BIP

He turned around to face his computer that flashed to a live streaming video of Watari.

"L"

"What is it, Watari?"

"Another victim has left something like a suicide note"

"Great. Scan it in and send it to me."

It only took seconds for him to receive the file, it read

Gods can't help me. I'm sick

Of waiting. I want

Death. I'm ready for it.

"L, do you know, Gods of Death?... Is he trying to suggest that Shinigami exist? … Is KIRA trying to give me some kind of clue?" He spoke softly only to himself – he couldn't help thinking this was a clue, but at the same time it felt like a ploy to distract his attention.

"Watari, there might be more victims leaving notes like this, tell the police to keep a close watch on all prisons"… There was a strong probability that KIRA was not done with his message, and he wanted his hands on the next note immediately – there had to be some hint in the finished message.

L kneeled down in front of his computer and pressed a button so that the video link ceased and pressed another so the surveillance of the task force conference room would be displayed.

What he saw did not shock him, the majority of the task force was towards the back of the room gossiping like teenagers – "it won't be long now before their numbers dwindle…what's this?"

Something caught his eye in the upper hand corner of the video screen. It was the two FBI agents who hitched onto the taskforce. The blonde-haired man was joking with the young brunette, they were both laughing, but she, she seemed the only one to actually be working as she talked. L zoomed in on the piece of paper she was writing on, it was a tad blurry but he could see the words of the suicide notes written neatly on the sheet, with the first words of each line circled. He watched as she drew a line from the circled words to the bottom of the page, making a thick arrow to point to what she wrote next, "L, Do you know, Gods of death…."

L squinted his eyes and moved his thumb to his lower lip gracefully, "Interesting…" he whispered. He watched as she underlined gods of death, underneath she wrote 'real? Need next note, has to be message from KIRA.' He kept watching intently to see if she could come up with anything he hadn't thought of yet but all's he saw was her face get a little red as she wrote 'KIRA = LOSERFACE…. Should have learned to read Japanese, stupid stupid stupid…' he smirked at the childish slam against their foe.

"Well, at least she is aware she's at a disadvantage.. but even so, she's the only one that made any connection with the notes." He zoomed back out once he realized she was just doodling now. She was swaying back and forth in her seat with a lollipop in her mouth, continuing to joke around with her FBI colleague. He must have said something funny because she removed the lollipop and laughed as she playfully shoved his shoulder. What flavor is that, he wondered… licking his lips as he felt around for a candy in the pile next to him. He unwrapped his candy and popped it in his mouth, "mmm, that's better".

He continued to watch out of curiosity, the interaction between the two confused L, the girl was usually very serious and stern during the times she spent in the conference room but today she almost seemed… happy? "Why the change?" he thought out loud. He shook the thought from his mind as he turned his screen on standby.

A week later

BIP BIP BIP

"Yes Watari?"

"The FBI Director is on the line"

"Put him through"

"L, I just got word from Japan that the agents we sent over are all dead. I tried reaching them earlier and couldn't get a hold of any of them – KIRA got them, there is no other explanation."

L sighed heavily, and asked if anyone else had access to their faces and names. It turned out that a file had been sent to all the agents.

'This can only mean KIRA was in contact with one of the agents, and can somehow control their actions prior to death' he thought.

His thoughts were interrupted by the FBI director.

"I'm sorry L, but the FBI is terminating its investigation in Japan" He went on to explain how the killings have just been in Japan recently, and that the US shouldn't be involved at this point.

"Chief Yagami is on the line, I'm telling him the FBI was there under your request, understood? Good bye."

The phone clicked off and L walked towards the window as he dialed Watari.

"Watari, go somewhere private please, quickly. The 12 FBI agents have been killed; the US is pulling their investigation out of Japan. Are the two FBI agents at HQ now?"

"Tatum is here, I'm afraid Mishca has stepped out for a long lunch."

There was a pause on the line as L shifted his footing.

"I'm more concerned with the girl, she is a valuable asset to the team and has come to more conclusions than the rest of them – some of which she deduced before me even. I want her to remain on the case."

"Indeed. What do you need me to do?"

"Patch me through to her cellphone"

"… Are you sure that is a good idea? Contacting one of the members directly?"

"It's a risk that I'll have to take – the other members aren't nearly half as good as she is, we need her on this one."

"Very well, patching you through now."

"Yes?" Her voice came over the phone, he smirked at the fact she did not answer the phone with her name, as so many others do.

He double checked to ensure the voice distorter was on before saying anything -

"Forgive the intrusion, but there is an urgent matter I must discuss with you … This is L"

There was a pause on the line and he could hear her breathing – he could tell she was thinking

"… and how do I know you are… you've given me nothing to go on, for all I know you could be KIRA with a nifty voice distorter"

His smirk got wider. Definitely need this one for this case he thought. Would anyone else on the team think to accuse L of being KIRA? Not likely – they weren't that bright. But she, she was being cautious… valuable indeed.

"Very good – yet another reason why we must speak"

She took a short breath, "If you truly are L, I'm sure you are aware how dangerous contacting any of us directly is for you – for your sake, please make it quick."

He paused for a while, smirk gone. 'For my sake?' he thought, thinking how this was the first time someone was actually concerned for HIS safety, besides Watari of course. Did she see him as a human? That would be a change – everyone relates L to a machine…. He shook the thought from his head, she was right, he had to make it quick.

"You will be receiving a call soon from the FBI telling you that your work here is complete and not to return to HQ…."

He waited for her to interject, but heard nothing from her line

"…what I ask, is that you consider remaining on the task force of your own accord."

Static. Was she still there? He checked the connection, she was still there, but hadn't said a word. Shock, maybe? 'I assume that's only natural…' he thought.

"…. I will take your silence as careful consideration. Please come to a decision on my request quickly, and if you decide to stay, please get back to HQ as quickly as possible."

He hung up, hoping she'd agree to stay on the case.

The Next Day

"L, Another victim has left a note, I'll scan it in for you"

'L do you know, gods of death… what comes next?' he thought waiting in anticipation.

Love I've never known, and dessert is always

Apples? This is no life, I'm better off dead.

L grinded his teeth, KIRA was just toying with him!

'Still, I'm sure you've left a bigger clue than these notes after you killed those agents!'

L spent the rest of the next few hours determining which agents were sent the file in which order. With the help of the director, he finally got it.

At 5pm he switched his computer screen back to the taskforce conference room, earlier that day Chief Yagami suggested that only those who are willing to put everything on the line, stay. Most of the task force decided to leave – there were only 5 Japanese members left, along with the two FBI agents who sat in the same corner of the room. He eyed them for a moment, L had not expected the blonde man to stay. 'he's just as bad as Matsuda, his motive for staying must be something else…' he thought. Moments later Chief Yagami walked back into the room, "Just 8 of us then, no, as much as 8, willing to risk your lives."

"How are we going to do this with just 8 people?"

L watched as Mastuda said there were really 10, if they counted L and Watari. This is when he chose to speak up

"I have great faith in those of you who were brave and committed enough to stay"

Just then, Shuichi Aizawa retorted that they didn't trust him. Soon, most of the Japanese members spoke up saying that their lives are on the line, their faces and names are shown on their badges, and that the deaths of the FBI agents was L's fault.

'This was to be expected' he thought, he watched as Chief Yagami and the FBI agents just sat there, letting everyone get their feeling out and their voices heard. 'Do they have nothing to say?' he thought as his eyes shifted to Mishca, who did not look pleased – L couldn't place her expression, was she upset, like the others - that L had let this go on this far, or was she upset at the shouting match aimed towards him or was it an entirely different reason? He couldn't decide which it was – it bothered him, people were easy to read for him, why couldn't he read her? She was confusing as all hell damn it, and it irritated him –. He shook the thought from his mind and placed his attention back on the room.

"How do we know we can trust you L?"

Mishca quietly said "You don't", but L still heard her and Watari casted a knowing glance her way.

"If you plan on working with us on this case L, can you at least come here so we can all work together?" Chief Yagami interjected. "Yeah, if you show yourself, we would be able to trust you and cooperate with you!" One of the other members shouted.

"As I said before, I have great faith in you all…. Watari?"

L began typing "I would like to meet the 8 of you who have my trust as soon as possible, do not speak of our meeting, or that you have met me, what we will be doing to anyone who is not in the room now. That includes anyone else at the NPA, your family and friends. Please leave this room and decide whether or not you can swear to the above and whether or not you can trust me. Only those people who agree to trust me should come back to the room. Once this is complete, I will send further instruction to this computer."

L waited for all the members to leave, but not everyone left. Tatum and Mishca stayed behind with Watari.

"Aren't you guys coming?" Aizawa said arrogantly to the two as he was leaving.

Although she looked stunned, L watched as she calmly replied "I don't need time to think this over, I can't speak for Tatum, but I have complete trust in L – everything he's done up to this point has shown us all how far he is willing to go. And honestly, I want to catch this bastard really bad… But… I can see why someone like you would need this time"

"Yeah, we would have gone back to the states if we didn't trust him." Tatum said. Aizawa just rolled his eyes and slammed the door behind him, obviously infuriated.

L watched closely – if she had left, it would have looked odd. He was pleased that she didn't even leave the room.

Mishca turned to face her desk and began folding a piece of paper in every which direction. He noticed that the writing of "love apples" could be seen on the sheet – he had gathered that it was the same sheet she was working on days before. He watched as she created a little box out of the paper and set it neatly on the desk in front of her. Seconds later he watched as she brought her fist down on it, crushing the paper. She sat there and just stared at it, visibly angry.

Watari moved close to her and placed a comforting hand on her shoulders, "Is everything alright my dear?"

L tilted his head at the kind gesture – not entirely sure what feeling he was experiencing.

She glanced up at his handler and smiled "I just really want to catch this guy – this message was a ploy. I knew it could've been… but I really wanted it to be something else."

"AAhhh. I see. Surely with L, the team and you all working together, we will be able to solve this quickly."

"I'm not so sure about that, Watari."

Watari was about to respond when the team re-entered the room – minus one member. L thought to himself that he would have to inquire as to her last statement. He quickly typed out the address of the hotel he was staying at, and told the members to meet him by midnight.

"Hey Mishca! That's the hotel we're staying at anyway!"

Mischa hit Tatum lightly on the shoulder and giggled, "Thank you captain obvious"


	9. Chapter 8: Panic

Chapter 8: Panic

Yay we get to see that Mishca's actually a human still! Queue panic attack in 3…..2…1

Mishca was standing in the elevator in the Imperial Hotel, watching as the floor number clicked past hers. All she could think of was how to keep calm – but it wasn't working, on the outside she appeared calm and collected, but she was screaming on the inside. 'So many things just went wrong in that short meeting…' she thought, 'Watari has obviously made a connection with me… the way he looked at me when I said "you don't" oh jesus, please don't remember our conversation from last year... Stupid, stupid why did I say that… and now I have to show I really want to catch KIRA… I mean, I do, but I didn't want to show my real self at all… uugghhh… and freaking Tatum, thank you for divulging where I am staying! All the easier for him to gain access to me and what I know if he chose to… and to top it all off I have to meet L… face to face… KIRA, please just kill me now! How the hell am I going to get through this? Breath… just breath…'

DING

'Oh shit' She thought… 'no, this can't be the right floor… please dear god let me just stay on this elevator forever'

"Are you coming Mishca?"

"… Oh, uh, yea, right behind you Tatum"

'O dear god save me… !'

They walked to the fifth door on the right, and knocked.

'Oh… my… god… L is on the other side of that door… please dear god don't be anything like Rue… I mean B… or is it BB? Well whatever the fuck, let him be hideous, let him be boring, just let him be completely different, please!'

Watari opened the door and she felt like passing out. 'one foot in front of the other… come on, you remember… left..right…left…left…shit. just walk in the room damnit!'

They all poured into the room, Mishca situated herself next to Tatum on the left of Chief Yagami. If anything else, Tatum could pick her up off the floor if she passed out. Mishca's eyes were at the floor, she slowly raised them in front of her to take in the sight of him… bare feet… worn out blue jeans… white long sleeve shirt… dear god he's skinny… finally she reached his face. 'holy mother of god…. KIRA please kill me now!' If anything his features are softer…. Rue was… rough around the edges… but L… 'Stop thinking that way!' she yelled at herself in her head.

"I'm L"

Everyone began introducing themselves, when it got to Tatum, in one quick fluid motion; Mishca covered his mouth with her hand. She didn't know how she managed to speak, but she did. "Introductions from us are not necessary, L"

L stared into her eyes, she felt like he could see right through her. "Very good… I expected nothing less from you…" he turned back to the rest of the bunch who were glaring at Mishca… she was used to the stares by now. "As for the rest of you…."

They all watched him raise his arm and form a gun with his hand. "BANG!"

"HEY! Is that your idea of a joke or something?" Matsuda exclaimed.

"If I was KIRA, you'd all be dead right now Yagami-San, that is, for the exception of our FBI colleagues to the left of you"

Mishca could feel hot glares coming from Aizawa… he definitely did not like her showing them up.

"All KIRA needs to kill is a name and a face… you ought to know that by now… Let's value our lives and not give your names out so carelessly"

Mishca watched as L moved to sit down, "Please turn off your cellphones and place them on that table there."

Mishca did as he said while the others complained. "I just don't like phones ringing when I'm trying to talk… please sit wherever you are comfortable."

Mischa watched as he pulled his legs into his chest… '! Wow, BB really played him well… but please…. If there is a god, no strawberry jam… please? PLEASE?' Mishca sat on the floor with her feet beneath her, she was tired of sitting so this was all she was going to agree to. The rest of the guys filled in on the couches around her and the table, with L sitting at the chair at the head of the table, intently focusing on her choice of seating, which happened to be next to him… she didn't intend to sit so close, but that was the only free floor space available. Not wanting to look intimidated, she stared back into his eyes… ' my god those are lovely eyes… damn… shut up shut up push that aside! Focus on the case… maybe looking at him at all is just a bad idea…' She focused on the table. There were many coffee cups and sugar options… she decided to pour herself a cup… hey, if she was going to have a total nervous breakdown today, at least she could blame it on too much caffeine or something… right? She slowly poured a cup and asked if anyone else would like one as well, they all looked at her like she was an alien… 'maybe… I shouldn't have done that… oh well' she sat back the way she was before and took a sip of the coffee… "Bleh.." she said softly and added sugar to it. All the while L was staring at her intently, watching her every move. She noticed a soft smirk as she added a few sugar cubes to the coffee.

He brought his attention back to the whole team, "two more things, please do not write anything down in these meetings, commit everything to memory, and secondly…Don't call me L anymore please call me Ryuzaki." If she wouldn't have looked like a complete moron she would have spewed her coffee all over his white top. 'WHAT THE HELL IS HE USING THAT NAME FOR?' She tried her best to keep her composure but couldn't help but think he knew something already…. 'No.. no way.. if he did he'd have me chained up or something by now… o dear god please don't let me slip and say Rue….'

Matsuda broke the silence by suggesting they stop broadcasting criminals names on the tv and other media. 'Thank god someone spoke up!'

"If we do that ordinary people will be killed…" L said

"Ordinary people?"

Mishca got up the never to speak up… "Yes.. he's right about that, if we hide those criminals, the petty ones will begin dying.. and then when those are through, he'll move on to innocents… he'd think whoever hid the names of criminals would be criminals themselves, thus putting everyone else at risk…"

L gave her an approving look while everyone else looked confused….she felt proud 'thank goodness I don't look like an idiot in front of him'

'Mishca-San is correct, KIRA would say, withhold criminals from me and I'll kill liars and cheaters, I'll even kill innocent people, I'm taking the whole world hostage and its your fault"

"But how do you know that?"

"Because KIRA is childish and hates to lose"

"Care to elaborate on that?"

"I know because I too am childish and hate to lose…" He filled his coffee cup with over 10 sugar cubes.. Mishca recognized the smell of sugar-coffee slush – it reminded her of when Rue added too much sugar to her coffee way back in the beginning of their relationship… she stared into her cup wondering if she could really handle being so close to him. He stirred his sugar as he continued "… as I'm sure Mishca-San is as well, as she displays the characteristics… that is why I asked her to remain on the case in addition to her exceptional deduction skills."

Their mouths dropped open and stared at her in anger 'Thanks L… way to put a target on my back they already hate me'

"But, if we're going to worry about the media, maybe we should focus on shielding how few of us there are hunting KIRA down… say… use the media for our benefit in order to complete this…"

"But how..?" Tatum piped up

" How about something like this for example… US outraged over deaths of FBI agents, world outraged. G8 nations agree to send 1500 investigators to aid in the KIRA manhunt"

"Wow, that could really work L! I mean, Ryuzaki!" Matsuda said excited.

"…Well…" Mishca said, "Kira seems to be rather more intelligent than the typical serial killer. I wouldn't doubt if he sees right through this ruse… all though… it may still force a reaction out of him and we'll be watching closely…"

"That's entirely possible… but as you said, we will watch for the reaction… and there will surely be one"

L finished explaining the recent events, and how they show KIRA is working alone and how he can control the victims before their death. At the end, Yagami asked if showing them his face was a failure.

"Yes, having to show myself and the deaths of those FBI agents means that I lost… but I will win the war.- lets show him that justice will prevail!" He smiled at this, and Mishca couldn't help but smile as well because of it.

"Now that we are finished, I would like to talk to each one of you individually to make sure KIRA is not among us"

"Wait! You still don't trust us?" Aizawa exclaimed

"Aizawa, put yourself in his shoes – information has been leaked to KIRA, and if he was in the task force originally, he's probably still here, and now he's seen his face… I'd do the same thing, it's nothing against us, we just have to be sure."

"Thank you for that Mishca… you might as well be first then Aizawa-San. Please, follow me."

Aizawa glared at her as he passed.

Two hours had passed and Mishca was the last one waiting to be spoken to. When L finally came back out he whispered something to Watari before asking for her to enter the next room. Before entering, she could faintly hear Watari letting the other members leave if they wished, as it was getting late. 'O dear god don't leave me alone with him!' She entered the room behind L and closed the door.

~Switch to L POV ~

Finally, it was time to speak with her. The other members took longer than expected, but he didn't bother showing them the trick he had planned – it wasn't necessary for them. On the way out he whispered to Watari "Please instruct the others to leave, if they wish. I presume this one may take longer than the others…"

He watched her silently as she shut the door and walked over to and peeked out the curtains. She sighed, "now that's just not fair…"

He tilted his head, confused, "what may I ask, isn't fair? You being last?"

She turned around and laughed slightly "no…. that's not it." She turned back to the open curtains, "It's just that… you have a balcony… I don't have one in my room…"

He raised an eyebrow "You… like balconies I presume?"

"I love them… there's just something about them…" She walked towards the bed and sat down Indian style and sighed again. "… but anyway, I'm sorry I've gotten completely off track. Please begin"

He just stared at her for a moment, her icey blue eyes piercing his as he did so. "Your eyes are very blue…" he whispered…

"Uh… I'm sorry? Does… eye color mean something?"

He shifted his footing, "Not at all… blue eyes are just hard to come by in Japan…"

"Yes, well… I am American you know…"

"Yes, indeed…." He trailed off, placing his thumb in his mouth and biting softly. 'Why did I mention her eyes? That has nothing to do with why she's in here…' he sighed heavily and squinted his eyes, what was with this girl that made him so furious? 'She makes no sense… that's why…' he concluded… there couldn't possibly be a different reason.

"I created a sort of trick, to see if any of the members were KIRA…"

"Then wouldn't it be wise not to tell me that it's a trick?" She said as she put her hand through her hair… the soft brown waves fell around her face and he resisted the urge to comment on that as well… 'what the hell is going on here, it's just hair stop focusing on it!'

"It would have been, if you hadn't solved it already."

"I solved it? When?"

"The KIRA message… that you made so neatly into a box and destroyed… deciphering that was the trick"

She paused, eyes wide…

"Don't worry, you've shown that you couldn't possibly be KIRA. The trick wasn't required for you any way… I must come clean… I didn't really bring you in here to interrogate you"

She looked up at him, confused.

"I've been wanting to know… when you spoke to Watari,… he had said that we could all solve this case quickly together – and you replied that you didn't think so… what was the meaning of that statement?"

She blinked twice. "That's what this is about?"

"Yes, please explain"

"It's nothing really…" she said as she gazed out the balcony windows "I just, don't think it's going to happen all that fast…"

"Why do you assume that?"

She sighed, obviously not wanting to reply. Mishca looked back towards him

"I don't have very much faith in the team… I know that's horrible to say.. but.. they miss things… a lot of things… I can't help but think we're just going to slow you down and some people treat this like its all okay, like they're meeting some celebrity.. they don't get how bad this is… for you… to actually… show yourself to a group of people" she shook her head… "some of them just don't see the gravity of the situation"

He was shocked, it's not the answer he expected but seemed extremely honest.

"You see things – I've noticed you coming to conclusions faster than I… by a few seconds mind you… but still… before me.."

She smiled but shrugged it off "Just lucky I guess"

He squinted his eyes again "No… Not luck. You're hiding something… there is no way you are just an intern. Your level of knowledge and how quickly you come to conclusions shows you have some past history in this field… you are no mere intern…"

Her eyes got wide and she looked down at her hands… "I know I can't fool you… so I'll just be straight with you… I…. used…to be the 4th."

He tilted his head, "The 4th what?"

She coughed nervously.. "um.. well… you're number one… and I um… am. .. err.. was… number 4. Get it?" She was grasping for words to explain herself… painfully so, he was certain she was aware what that knowledge meant to him.

He just looked at her, "1.7%" '..mm… but the way she talks… theres no way its that high….'

" … no… more like… .5%... but still…"


	10. Chapter 9: Confusion

Chapter 9: Confusion

'Unbelievable… I start out looking intelligent and then I fall to pieces in front of him! Babbling fool! Does he really suspect me of being KIRA? … better for him to think that I suppose, than for him to know the truth…' she thought as she slowly walked towards her hotel room. "There is no way I can call him Ryuzaki… that's just going to be…. Painful."

A loud sigh of relief came from her lips as she closed the door behind her. Not bothering to lock the door, she leaned against it and slowly allowed herself to fall to the floor… she tucked her knees into her chest and placed her arms around her legs.

'Maybe if I just don't address him at all... that may be best… less chance for me to slip up…'

'…then again, I wouldn't have to worry about slipping up if it wasn't for him in the first place… one person… just one person has altered my life so drastically it's ridiculous… if it wasn't for him, I'd still be the 4th greatest… no… I'm sure I would have beaten out the 3rd by now if I hadn't abandoned everything…'

She sat silent for a while until she finally whispered… "This is all his fault" before standing up and locking the door. She sighed 'No… it's not… I should have seen it! I shouldn't even be here… what happens if my scars are seen? I'm never going to be able to leave… he'll probably think I'm out for revenge or something absolutely absurd and lock me up forever… this is so dangerous…. Why did I agree to come here? God I have been so stupid lately!'

Still… she couldn't help but feel resentment towards L even if things weren't his fault.

Before turning around she wondered. 'Have I completely sabotaged myself here?'

She couldn't push away the next concern that crossed her mind '… or worse… have I put the greatest detective in harms way just by being here?'

By now she was standing at the window, she didn't even remember walking over to it. Looking out she sighed again. "What have I done?"

~ Flash to Ls hotel Room ~

"Ryuzaki, is everything alright?" He heard Watari's voice behind him, but didn't turn around. He kept his hand on the glass of the balcony window as he stared out.

"It's that girl"

"Oh?" A faint smirk could be heard in his voice, but he shrugged it off.

"… There's something… not right… something just doesn't fit with her. I can't put my finger on it…"

Watari waited for him to continue

"I originally began to think she could be KIRA…"

"Is that so? What makes her a KIRA suspect?"

"Her mood has changed recently, along with how she's treating others.. in the beginning she was quite serious, for some reason she is showing more emotion now…"

Watari softly laughed "I'm afraid you'll have to get used to women eventually Ryuzaki.. mood swings are quite normal for the female gender."

He glanced back at him and rolled his eyes before returning to the window. "Even so - she blatantly hid her true identity from everyone just to get on this case, she comes to conclusions as quick as I… which I haven't seen before… which doesn't make sense unless she had some in-depth prior detective history or she knows too much… which could only mean she is, or knows KIRA…. Her choice of seating was the closest to me during the meeting, and she showed no sign of intimidation… the others sat there like statues… but she… she actually got comfortable, even poured herself a cup of coffee… and when I brought her in here, she spoke to me at first, as if we were familiar with one another… it's all very strange"

"I can see why you would be suspicious, why have you let her go then?"

He sighed heavily as he put his hands in his pockets.

"Because nothing fits after what she told me… the suspicion is heavily based on how much she knows… and it seems that she is.. well, was, the 4th greatest detective at one point, and she didn't even try to cover it up after I accused her of hiding something."

"Really?'

He turned around, "Yes… but I am curious to know why she isn't STILL the 4th… no one has replaced her in that slot yet, and the first 3 still belong to me, so why is it that she refers to herself that way? No one has beaten her record, besides me of course… the slot is still hers if she is who she says."

"How close was she to beating the 3rd slot?"

"Last I checked, very close. Only about 100 cases away…"

"Both interesting and impressive I must say"

"…Indeed… but why has she chosen to come back… on this case nonetheless? If she considers herself retired, what is she doing here?... looking back at everything it just doesn't fit…. She doesn't make any sense to me… and she confuses me even more because she has repeatedly shown concern for me or supported my decisions while the others haven't"

Watari nodded his head to show he understood his frustration.

"And there's one other thing…"

"What's that Ryuzaki?"

He paused, returning to the window of the balcony and resisting the urge to say what he really wanted to…

"Do we have any strawberry shortcake left?"

Watari smiled and disappeared to retrieve some for him, but all he could think was

'_Those damned eyes!'_

* * *

><p>Okay, so, super super SUPER freaking short chapter. Sorry : ( … but I wanted to show the aftermath of the meeting between the two, and I don't need 2000 words to do that. I got to say, I love how much Mishca is tweaking out :) I know, I'm terrible…. But at least shes tweaking out internally so she doesn't look like a total crazy person to the team :)<p>

Hopefully L is believable… he has no idea what to think of her at this point and it's driving him nuts :) He's clueless to why he keeps thinking of her eyes and wants an answer, but doesn't let himself ask Watari what it could be… makes me excited to write more… : )

Let me know if you're enjoying the story : )


	11. Chapter 10: Difficulty

Chapter 10: Difficulty

Next Morning, Approx 630am

Mishca waited as the elevator climbed 3 floors, she hadn't slept and couldn't sit around doing nothing anymore. It may be too early for the others, but if L is anything like B, he'd be up working away – She was willing to take the chance since she was ready to get started on the case, regardless if L thought she was the culprit or not. The elevator doors slid open and she inhaled deeply, 'maybe this isn't such a good idea… coming alone…' she pushed the thought aside and reached L's door, knocking a few times. A moment passed and Watari appeared – "Good morning Mishca, it's a bit early, you don't have to be here for another two hours."

She smiled and looked towards the floor "Did I wake you? I'm sorry… it's just that, I can't sleep and I'd rather get working instead of sitting around twiddling my thumbs."

Watari laughed softly "Ryuzaki and I have been up for quite some time, please, come in." He opened the door wider to let her enter.

She heard Watari click the door shut behind her and saw L standing at the window with a bowl of strawberries. "I trust you slept well Mishca?" Came his smooth voice.

When she didn't answer he turned to face her. "Watari, do you have her items ready for her?"

"Yes.. but are you sure you don't want to wait for the others?"

He popped a strawberry in his mouth "Mmmm.. now is as good a time as any other…"

"Of course, Mishca, if you would follow me please"

She did as he asked, following him to a brief case at the other end of the room. "Here you are my dear, please wear this watch at all times, it will let us know where you are, and if you press the blue button here twice, my cell phone will ring. Please use this for emergencies as well."

She eyed the brief case as he spoke, the other items were leather belts. 'Why am I the only one that gets a watch?... and I don't really need him knowing my whereabouts every second of the day… ugghhhh'

She took the watch from Watari and examined it, it was quite beautifully crafted with diamonds and blue sapphire jewels. "This is a bit extravagant, don't you think?" She asked as she looked at Watari.

L turned to her and raised an eyebrow "It fits you… do you not like it? We can have another crafted."

Confused as to what he meant by it, she shook her head "That won't be necessary, it's quite a beautiful watch, but I was more interested in why everyone else gets a belt and not a watch…"

"A belt simply will not do. That is why."

Utterly confused, she placed her attention back to Watari who was handing her an ID badge. She looked at it, "Veronica Smith?... Seriously? I don't think so, I'm not using this."

L wrinkled his forehead and looked at her harshly "Fake IDs are necessary, each member will be receiving one in order to protect their identity, why do you refuse?"

He seemed mad that she was disobeying him, but she didn't care, she wasn't going to do this. She walked up to him as she threw the ID on the couch.

"For one, I rarely give my name out to anyone as it is, secondly when I have, I only ever give out a first name and finally.." she inched closer, visibly irritated, the closeness shocked L and he moved back a step, "What makes you think the name I've given is even real? Do you think me that ignorant?"

Her eyes were piercing his again and L gulped. He eyed her cautiously, taken aback by her boldness, 'Would anyone else be so bold as to react that way?' he thought. "Ignorant? No, that is definitely not how I would describe you." He retorted, not knowing what he even meant, but hoped it would satisfy her inquiry.

"Good" she said as she stepped back, but not before swiping his last strawberry and popping it in her mouth. L's mouth gaped open and his eyes widened "That was the last strawberry!" he breathed showing his annoyance.

Mishca laughed, "That's too bad, it was quite delicious I might add." She walked towards the couch eyeing the documents laid out on the table, she couldn't help but feel victorious at how she acted. She showed no sign of her true feelings but allowed herself to take some frustration out on him. She smirked at this and sat down 'Maybe this won't be so difficult after all,' she brought her legs up and intertwined them together so she sat Indian style.

L watched her in amazement; the audacity of this girl was irritating, but intriguing at the same time. She leaned forward to examine the documents, her hair falling forward as she did so. L couldn't help but notice how soft it appeared. He walked over to where she sat and jumped in his usual chair. He watched as she tucked the locks of hair behind her ear and pushed the sleeves of her shirt up so she could work with the documents easier. She took her right index finger and slid a paper down the table to get a better look at it.

Seconds later L dashed forward grabbing her right wrist and pulled it gently towards him. He tilted his head as she stared at him, now she was the one taken aback. "What is this?" He asked as he eyed her burn scar. She stared him down, "It's a burn, but I'm sure you knew that." She said sarcastically. His eyes were focused intensely on the area, "But how did it get there?" She was quickly getting annoyed at his close proximity, she couldn't take it… he smelled like sugar and strawberries, it was too much. "I burnt myself." He took his other index finger and glided it across her scarred skin and softly spoke "but HOW?" She had had enough and yanked her arm back "With a stove, are you done?" He quickly moved back to his awkward sitting position as she stared at him. 'Did I say maybe this wouldn't be difficult? Who was I kidding?' "Sorry" She heard him speak softly.

Her gaze softened. "Never mind that L, but it would be best for you not to focus on my scars. Just leave it be." She went back to examining the FBI agents' files on the table.

He watched her silently as he placed his index finger in between his teeth. 'Scars? So there's more than that one? And she called me L….she hasn't called me Ryuzaki once… this one is going to prove difficult, she refuses to obey anything!' He jumped up from his seat and walked into the bedroom "Watari" he said, signaling for him to follow.

Mishca watched as the two disappeared behind closed doors.

"What is it Ryuzaki? Is everything alright?"

He was pacing the floor… "Why must she be so difficult?"

"Difficult?"

"She makes no sense…. She refuses to follow any orders so far and she's completely rude and audacious!"

"Why may I ask, is this so important?"

L stopped pacing, his back towards his handler, he didn't say a word, he didn't even know what to say… there was no answer to that question… he had nothing, mind completely blank.

Watari coughed uncomfortably, "You said she was the 4th greatest detective, am I right?"

L turned to face him, "Yes, that is correct."

"You demand respect from her, is that also correct?"

"Yes"

Watari smiled, "I doubt she will ever show you the level of respect you desire, without you yourself showing her some respect."

L's eyes widened at the statement

"Ryuzaki, she is also a great detective – or was, either way, it seems she does not view you as superior, not someone who merits respect just because of position."

"So, she thinks I'm inferior to her?" He was even angrier now.

"Not quite. I believe she sees you as an equal, someone who should be giving her respect instead of demanding it of her."

He stood there, unsatisfied. "That still doesn't explain why she refuses to obey anything!"

Watari smiled, "I'm sure she has valid reasons that will come to light eventually."

"So, you suggest I wait to see what these reasons are?"

"Certainly"

"But I shouldn't have to wait!" His childish stubborn streak shown through.

Watari smiled as he retreated back to the door, "I'm sure, waiting for reasons from someone who is obviously tremendously challenging to solve by the great L, will be well worth it." At this, Watari left the room, leaving L standing there in shock. He was right, he couldn't solve this one, and it infuriated him to no end.

L slowly exited the room, and went to find more cake.

Mishca stood; bored with the documents she reviewed. She walked towards the bedroom and disappeared to the balcony deck, she was sure to close the glass behind her, knowing the cold breeze would probably not be welcomed by the others.

Back to L –

"Ryuzaki – the others have arrived."

"Good, have them sit, I will be right in."

Moments later L returned to the sitting area and sat in his chair, noticing Mishca's lack of attendance, which further irritated him. Deciding not to wait, he began.

"Thank you all for your patience. I'm very sorry for interrogating each of you like that yesterday, but now I can say that KIRA is not among us."

A sigh of relief could be heard from everyone besides Tatum who looked worried at the absence of his colleague.

"Watari, could you please hand out the materials?"

"Of course"

As Watari did so, L stood and walked towards the bedroom to retrieve his special candy dish. He laid eyes on it as soon as he entered. Impatiently, he attacked the bowl and ripped open 3 candies and popped them in his mouth.

He closed his eyes and tilted his head back. He sighed heavily, enjoying the flavors mixing together in his mouth. His eyes shot open when he heard a loud gust of wind. Looking towards the source, he saw Mishca out on his balcony leaning over the side as her hair blew in the cold wind. Not thinking twice, he grabbed an extra blanket from the bed and opened the balcony door, she didn't turn around at the noise he made, she looked to be in deep thought… 'I'd give anything to be inside that head right now… what goes on in there?'

He quietly stepped towards her and placed the blanket around her, he heard her gasp as she twirled around… the touch had obviously startled her. Her icey blue eyes stared into his and he found it hard to grasp for words "uhm… my apologies… I didn't mean to frighten you, but you seemed cold" he said as he shoved his hands into his jean pockets. She held on to the blanket and thanked him, a warm smile coming over her face. "You're welcome" he said softly, as he returned the smile, but not knowing why he had even cared that she was cold.

He walked towards the edge of the balcony and looked out "Why do you like these so much anyway Mishca?" She turned back to the view, neither of them realizing how close they were to each other. She sighed, "It's right in front of you L" He squinted his eyes in confusion and looked at her, "I don't follow". "Look at everything in front of you, the busy city below where you can see happy people going through out their daily lives and then the tree lines, and the sky… and we're so high up, we can see just about everything, don't you see how beautiful it all is?"

L was quiet for a while, he looked at the view and then back to her. He took a moment to take in the sight of her, finally realizing why he had previously focused so much on her features. "…Yes… I can see why some… would think certain things are beautiful" he said softly as he gazed at her. She turned to him and smiled, it made him feel awkward so he looked away. "L! you still aren't wearing any shoes!"

"Hmm? Oh yes.. well.."

"You must be freezing, come on, let's go back inside." She led him back inside the room… 'There she goes again… why is my state any concern of hers?'

"L?" She asked

He'd given up, there was no way she was ever going to use his alias. "Yes?"

"If you think I'm KIRA, why did you put yourself in a situation where you'd be alone with me?"

He was caught, she doesn't miss anything, does she?

"Although I find you exceedingly suspicious, there is no way you are KIRA. Your characteristics don't fit"

"I see" she said as she placed the blanket back on the bed. She exited the room to meet up with the other members, leaving L behind.

"Hey! So you are here! Where have you been hiding?" Matsuda exclaimed

"Oh, hey Matsu… I needed some fresh air, I didn't realize how long I was out there"

"So was Ryuzaki totally mad? You missed the whole thing, look, we get these cool belts and fake IDs!"

Mishca laughed at this, "I know, I was already briefed on that."

She walked over to Tatum and sat next to him, placing her head on his shoulder.

"Are you alright?" He asked.

"Yeah. But this is getting more difficult for me by the minute."

"Anything I can do?"

"Not really."

L walked in and saw Matsuda's excitement over the belt, and how the two on the couch were sitting. He eyed them curiously, not knowing what he was feeling.

"That's it for today. Please spend the next couple of days getting used to your new names and tracking down all the video tapes you can on these agent's deaths." L spoke finally.

"Right away Ryuzaki, you heard the man, let's get moving" Chief Yagami instructed.

The Japanese police force exited quickly and L watched as Mishca and Tatum slowly walked to the door, laughing and smiling at each other as they left.

He blinked at the sight as Watari just shook his head.

As the door shut, Watari stepped closer to L. "What's the matter Ryuzaki?, you are not acting yourself."

L looked at the floor, slouching his shoulders even further as he stuck his hands back in his pockets. "I truly do not know, Watari."

He sighed as he thought 'she is making this investigation exceedingly more difficult for me… why am I being affected like this?'

He couldn't find an answer, he was getting sick of not knowing, he was L for god sake! He should be able to figure this out…


	12. Chapter 11: A Feeling

Chapter 11: A feeling

A few days later (For those of you keeping track, this is around January 5)

"Wow, Watari did all of this?" Matsuda exclaimed as everyone came inside the hotel room with boxes of tapes. "Look at all these tvs!" he said as he set his box down.

"Yeah, this will make it easier. 2 people can watch one TV at a time… we could get through most of the tapes faster that way" Mishca said.

"Awesome! Great idea Watari!" Matsuda said. Laughing, Watari just nodded, and said they were put there at L's instruction.

Tatum lightly tapped Matusda on the head, "Great deduction!" and laughed. The others joined in and Mishca even noticed a small grin on L's face.

"Hey Tatum, let's set up on that TV there, what do you say?" Matsuda said.

"Mishca" she heard L's voice over the commotion. "I would prefer if you watched this TV here." Indicating the TV he was sitting in front of. "I am curious, to see what you can find, first hand."

If she was going to watch these tapes, he wanted her with him. Afterall, he had to see how good she really was, and he needed to know if she could catch things he couldn't. 'Let's see… just how good she really is'

"Um.. sssure." She said 'Oh great…. This is going to be wonderful' she thought sarcastically.

She sat next to L in her usual posture as he picked a tape. She looked around; the others were already closely focused on their screens. She couldn't help but smile at the two goof balls in the corner, they were like twins.

L caught her staring elsewhere, "Mmmm… was your preference, to work with Tatum instead of me?" he asked

She turned around quickly, not entirely sure why he would assume that. "Um.. No, no, it doesn't matter who I watch these tapes with."

He placed his attention back on the tv and said "I see", before hitting the play button.

He couldn't help but feel a tinge of something… but he didn't know what exactly it was. L tightened his grip on his knees and watched the screen, but every so often he'd glance her way to see her reactions to the tape.

An hour had passed, and no one saw anything out of the ordinary, until…

L's eyes widened as he moved in closer to the TV, at the same time Mishca moved for the controls, which happened to be on the other side of L. She reached for the control and pressed stop, missing L by less than an inch. She felt L stop breathing as she did so; embarrassed, she slowly sat back down in her regular position, nearly grazing his face as she did so. Her heart beat faster 'That was close'.

He turned to look at her, eyes wide "So, I gather you noticed that too?" he said in one breath, his mind racing with the extremely close proximity that they had just found themselves in seconds before. He didn't like to be touched… not unless he initiated it, but for some reason, her closeness stopped being an issue for him right then, but he didn't know why. All's he could think about was how her hair had smelled as she almost knocked him off his seat to get to the stop button. 'I shouldn't be so comfortable with that… I shouldn't have _enjoyed_ it…' he thought.

"Uhmm.. yea, he..he had an envelope before."

He breathed, "Exactly."

Her mind was going ten times faster than she thought was humanly possible. She sat on her hands to prevent anyone from seeing that she was so startled by the incident that her hands shook. She breathed in deeply trying to calm down. 'I need to be more careful… being this close, uughh. I'm not going to make it!'

"Hey guys, we need another TV, we've got something over here" Mishca shouted so everyone would hear.

"Really? What is it?"

"Raye Penber… come on, hook up that tv to this one."

It took a few minutes for them to hook it up, but they finally got it so the tape was shown on both screens.

"Now" L said, can you play back the part where Penber was going through the turnstile, and then where he dies on the other screen?"

Mishca moved for the control again, this time making sure to give him room. She did as he asked and played them from the spot he asked –

"Look – there, he has an envelope, and when he gets off and dies, it's gone!... That train only takes an hour, he was on it for an hour and half... why?"

"Yeah… and if you look at the time, he received the file 8 minutes after getting on the train… and at the end… it looks like, he's trying to look back into the train" Mishca said

The other members eyed them "Wow… you guys.. uh.. work, really good together. We would have never caught that" Matsuda said.

Mishca's face turned a little pink at his comment, and L noticed. They did work well together… it was interesting to see how quickly they both saw the same thing and immediately created deductions based on what they saw… it was truly fascinating, he thought – he couldn't help but slightly grin at the thought, it made him glad, that there was someone else like him.

'…Rue and I never saw the same things…' Mishca tried to shake the feeling, but she couldn't help but feel a sense of pride and hurt at the same time.

"Wouldn't it be interesting, if KIRA was on that train?" L said

"There's no way!"

"I agree, it's not likely, since KIRA can kill from far away… but maybe, he was hoping we'd think that, so he took the risk to come out into the open."

"That's quite possible" Mishca agreed. "But, even if he was on that train, there's no way he'd let himself be captured by a security camera."

L countered, "But if he WAS caught on camera, we could call him in as a material witness! … I want you all to go to every station on the Yamanote line, get all the footage they have for December 27! We may have a chance to see KIRA, go, now!"

Everyone scrambled to leave, Mishca was about to get up to help them in their search, but L's hand shot up and grabbed her wrist, gently pulling her back down to the couch.

"We need to finish watching this tape Mishca, there could be something we didn't see. Let the others bring the tapes back."

"Oh, uh, alright. I guess you're right."

'Finally… she listens to something' he thought

The door shut, and again they were the only ones in the room with Watari.

'If these people keep leaving me alone with him… I swear to god I am just going to die!'

A few hours later

Chief Yagami and Mogi brought back the first batch of tapes and gave them to L and Mishca. Mishca took care of setting up the tapes while L gave them their next orders. They were to continue searching for connections between the other 11 FBI agents and the heart attack victims. They set up in the far corner of the room and began working.

Mishca hit play on the controls… "L?" she asked softly.

He was surprised at how gentle she had spoken his name. He kept himself from smiling, and immediately chided himself for liking the way she said his name. "Yes, what is it?"

"Do you really think KIRA is on one of these tapes?"

"No.. but there is only one way to be certain."

She sighed and reclined into the couch, she tilted her head on the cushion and watched as the tapes played side by side. He observed her out of the corner of his eye, wondering what she was thinking… 'why do I care?' he thought.

A few more hours passed, and Yagami and Mogi both said their goodbyes to L and Mishca as they headed home. For yet another time, the two were left to themselves while Watari stayed hidden. She was beginning to think he had done this on purpose, 'impossible' she thought to herself.

A few more hours passed and it had gotten dark outside. Suddenly, L felt pressure on his right shoulder and glanced down, noticing Mishca had fallen asleep on him. He blinked, not knowing what to do. He poked her shoulder a few times with his index finger, but she didn't wake up. 'Do I let her sleep?' he wondered. Just then Matsuda and Tatum got back with their share of tapes.

"Sorry it took so long Ryuzaki, it was hard to get them to cooperate but here are the tapes!" Matsuda said loudly,

"Oh hey hey ssshhhh! Look you dumby!" Tatum whispered as he pointed to his sleeping friend but it was too late, L had gotten up to retrieve the tapes.

"mmm yes, I'm not quite sure what to do with her" he said as he grabbed the tapes from Matsuda.

"UUGHH! Why did you move?" Tatum said angrily at L.

L looked at him, totally lost.

"She was actually soundly asleep and you had to go and move! Why would you do that?"

"I'm afraid I don't understand….?"

"Nevermind" Tatum puffed as he walked over to the sleeping girl. L watched as he scooped her up in his arms, cradling her as he walked her to the bedroom. '… I would've never thought to do that' L thought as his lips parted…

Tatum came back shortly, looking more at ease. "It's alright for now, she's still asleep."

L was lost for words, he had no idea what the big deal was.

"May I ask… why it was so important for me not to move?"

Tatum just looked at him "Sorry Ryuzaki… but, she doesn't sleep well, and when she does.. it's not GOOD sleep… you know?... it's just… she looked so comfortable and now she's probably going to wake up because she's been moved…"

"I see - - - she can stay here tonight then, that way she has no more disturbances."

"Sounds good…" Tatum said as he and Matsuda moved towards the door, "And Ryuzaki?"

"Yes?"

"Keep an eye on her for me… will you?"

L just nodded his head as the two left. He was curious to know, 'is she his?' He had never seen firsthand someone care that much for someone else.

He walked towards the bedroom and watched her sleep from the doorway. He tried to ignore the feeling that was creeping up on him… but it didn't work. There was one fact he couldn't ignore, he didn't want her to be Tatum's… he felt angry once he came to this conclusion, why didn't he want her to be? 'It shouldn't matter who she's with, what does it matter anyway? It has no bearing on the case!' He puffed out harsh air from his lungs and went back to watching the tapes. He had a hard time focusing on them as his eyes kept wandering back to the bedroom.

AAaaawwww. L no likey how close Tatum and Mishca are. Poor L : ( Too bad he still doesn't understand why he doesn't like it…

The story will be moving on to surveillance of the Yagami and Kitamura families next, along with L finally meeting Light at University (Yay!) and shortly after, the death of BB… dun dun dun… wonder how Mishca will react to that one? *evil grin* MWUHAHAHA you shall have to wait and see :)


	13. Chapter 12: Suspicion

Chapter 12: Suspicion

Wow, I'm so glad you guys like the story! Thanks so much for all the input! I'm so relieved you guys think Mishca sounds real – I didn't want the main character to sound perfect – I like the fact she has flaws : )

Seems I've got some BB lovers here huh? ;-) I love BB… but I have to admit, I love L so much more =D

* * *

><p>He heard her moving in the next room, it sounded like she was struggling. Worried, he walked to the bedroom quietly and peaked in. She was dreaming – something horrible, he gathered. 'Should I wake her? … no.. that would probably make matters worse…' he stepped closer to her and gently grazed his finger across her face, moving her hair out of the way. He didn't know why he had done it, but stepped back in shock when her body calmed after his touch. He left quickly, fearing she was waking. He sat back in his original position and tried to look focused on the tapes, but he was concerned. What could possibly be so bad, for her to react that way in her sleep? And why had it stopped after he touched her? 'Coincidence' he decided.<p>

Moments later….

She looked at him from across the room, he looked so engrossed in the tapes that he watched. Did he really think he'd find something in them? She was sure he wouldn't, KIRA wasn't stupid and would avoid all the cameras if he was there himself - and what exactly was L looking for anyway? It's not like they have a clue what KIRA looks like anyway and watching for suspicious activity would be challenging.

He captured her attention as she noticed his long slender fingers tapping his knee caps... it was almost like he didn't know he was doing it, it looked so effortless. Just then he stretched forward and placed sugar cubes in his coffee cup, he used so many she lost count half way through. She watched as he poured the coffee over the cubes, amazed that he didn't spill it - his touch was so delicate, like everything he touched needed to be examined for some clue and his fingers would destroy any evidence there was on it. She eyed him curiously; Rue had attempted this before and failed. Comparing the two in her head, it was obvious the genuine copy was sitting right before her very eyes. L's actions didn't seem forced, this was who he was, and he didn't bother hiding it. She kept watching him as he stirred the coffee, barely touching the spoon... she couldn't help but wonder how his delicate touch would feel on bare skin... Rues... was always rough... always seemed contrived, like he was trying too hard... now that she looked back on it, she couldn't understand why she didn't see right through it.

The light from the screens bounced off the coffee and his brown eyes as he raised the cup to take a sip. It looked to be a normal routine for him as he never even looked away from the TVs, even when he was setting the cup back on the table. His eyes were gleaming in the TVs light, and it drew her in. As she got closer she felt her heart beat faster. She watched as he slowly brought his hand up to his mouth and extended his index finger to his lips. She bit her bottom lip as his finger slowly entered his mouth and watched as he gently bit down on the tip of it. Without thinking she reached forward, cupping her hands around his and gently pulling it from his mouth as she sat next to him, allowing a soft sigh to release before she whispered, "Why do you do that?" his eyes grew wide as he moved his head towards her, his deep brown eyes moved slightly back and forth as if he was searching hers. She stared back into his and gulped slightly, she was frozen, she couldn't break the gaze even if she wanted to. His lips parted as if to speak but he said nothing, only glanced down at his hand in hers. She quickly realized what she had done. "Oh! I'm so sorry… I forgot… you don't like to be touched…" she removed her hands quickly and backed away to the last cushion on the couch. His gaze shot up to meet her eyes again, still searching, as he smoothly spoke "I never said I didn't like to be touched". 'Damnit!' she thought… 'Why did I touch him anyway?' "Oh.. well, I, um… your actions prove otherwise…" That should cover up her slight slip, right? She hoped he didn't read into it.

"I suppose… you are right." He said as his gaze returned to the TV. Moments later he glanced back at her, she was wrapping herself in a blanket trying desperately to get comfortable. "Wouldn't the bed be more comfortable?" She was hurt by his statement "I.. can't sleep. But I can leave –" "No.. that was not my intention… please.. stay." She looked at the floor, not sure of what she should do next. "Since you're awake… will you assist me in watching these tapes?" Her eyes shot back up and met his, they looked almost pleading, she couldn't say no. She inched closer so she could get a better view of the screen and he eyed her cautiously. "Oh… did you want me to set up a different screen?" She waited for an answer, but he sat there silent for what seemed like forever – was it such a difficult question? "… That will not be necessary." He finally managed to get out.

They sat silent for an hour, watching as the train and people passed by on the screen. He tilted his head slightly and spoke softly

"I … prefer you… like this"

She felt as if she was choking on air… "you, have a preference?"

"Mmm..yes, you can be… quite harsh at times. But this seems… sincere. You're not working your typical façade"

"I.. need to be, harsh… sometimes..." She looked away

"As do I" was all he replied.

A few more seconds passed.

"L?"

He was shocked at how gentle her voice was… again. She was starting to make him uncomfortable. No, it wasn't her saying his name that made it uncomfortable, it was the fact that he wanted her to say it… just like that. It sounded so… heartfelt?

He moved in his seat slightly, trying to shake the feeling. "Yes?"

"Are you eating that?" She pointed to the cake on the table… HIS cake.

"Umm…" He watched her staring at it,

"It looks really good, but if you're eating it I can go down to the lobby.. im sure they'll have something –"

"No.. here…" he handed her the last slice and a fork with the only thought in his head being to keep her where she was… why did he not want her to leave? He asked himself.

He watched as her eyes grew with excitement as she dug the fork into the cake. "Oh.. my..god. What is this? It's delicious!" she asked, not expecting the explosion of flavors in her mouth.

He let a small smile grace his lips – why did that please him?

A few moments later she put the empty plate back on the table. He watched as she yawned and stretched slightly. She was getting tired again. He looked forward at the tvs but watched her in his peripheral vision. She was moving to get comfortable and laid her head on the cushion. He kept from smiling as he watched her eyes close and reopen a few times, before she finally fell asleep. He watched another 20 minutes of footage before he felt her head slide down to his shoulder, her hand reached up and found its resting place on his chest. He froze, this was… he didn't know what this was.

He didn't want to wake her, from what Tatum said, she was sure to wake up again anyway, so it was best to let her sleep when she could. He expected her to have another night terror so he waited for her to wake up, to at least maneuver her body in a different fashion due to her dreams… he waited throughout the entire early morning hours, but she didn't move. She was sleeping soundly and not a strained breath or cry could be heard from her lips.

He couldn't help but think this was all a part of some mass scheme… he'd never let anyone get this close before, but somehow she managed to whittle her way next to him. She was indeed not KIRA… but that didn't mean he didn't suspect her of something else. What was she doing here anyway? She's retired right? What is her motive? He looked to her and then out the window, and then back to her. The sun had appeared. Its warm rays came through the window and landed on her hair, making it shimmer. He watched as she began to stir, a few seconds went by and she began to sit up slowly, staring at him wildly. 'I let her get that close…why?' he started to think that he didn't have any control of any situation where she was involved. This made him angry, the great L… out of control? That couldn't be right… everything happened the way he wanted it to happen, so why did it feel like this was completely out of his hands? 'It's her..' he thought 'this is some trick, to get close to me and lower my defenses… but.. why?' he came to a conclusion and was hell bent on taking control back from her… it was his, after all and he was damned if he was going to be played, by a retired detective nonetheless.

"Um.. good morning" she said sheepishly. He found her embarrassment to be endearing but he pushed it aside and went for the attack.

"You're here to threaten my position, aren't you?"

Her mouth dropped open, she couldn't manage to speak.

He leaned closer to her, glaring into her eyes looking for the truth.

"A previous great detective… back in the game after a long time… why else would you have chosen this case as your comeback? Surely you must have known I would be involved – what better way to prove your worth as a detective, than to get so close to the greatest detective that you could finish him off and take his place?"

She stumbled over her words, "I – I..… uh.. wh-what?"

"Once you got rid of me, you could masquerade as L or boast that you were the one that took me down. Surely your reputation would sky-rocket, if you had accomplished such a feat."

She was stunned. "how the hell could you expect me to do something like that? You.. really think, I'd try to replace you? How? By killing you? Are you serious?"

He tapped his lips with his fingers, "It all fits, I'm afraid. You're the only one that's managed to get this close, and I can't ignore the fact of how often we've been alone in such a short timeframe… the plan is a good one, indeed. But it won't work, now that I've caught you –"

She sprang up from the couch and breathed hard. "How DARE you!" She yelled at him, "I've been doing nothing but helping on this case, is it so hard to believe that I'm just interested in catching that damn bastard?" She began to walk away from him, wounded that he'd think such a thing. "How could you ever think… No, and even if you were right, your conclusion is flawed! You just said we've already been alone, so why haven't I already made my move? Why would I wait?" she shook her head and looked back at him from the doorway. "Your death is nothing I'd ever desire…" He watched her in disbelief, was that sadness that crossed her face? She opened the door and slammed it hard behind her. 'Was she… telling the truth?' he wondered.

It was hours before she returned to the room, when she got back everyone was already in deep discussion about more recent heart attacks. She walked over to a table by the window. It had a slew of breakfast assortments that had been picked over, she opted for coffee. As she was pouring her cup, she felt someone slide up to her side.

"Mishca?" Of course it was him, wouldn't he just leave her alone? She was so done with him today, she just wanted him to go away.

"What is it, L?"

"Have I… done, something, to offend you?"

She stared into his eyes, he could sense hurt in them, although he didn't know why it was there. He was sure she was strong and his accusations wouldn't cause such a thing… so why did she look so… miserable?

She took a deep breath, "As far as you go, you've done nothing out of the ordinary. I expect you'll have more things to accuse me of as time goes on – as it doesn't seem you'll be dropping this."

"Well," He bit down on his thumb, "You _are_ suspicious – can you deny that?"

She didn't break her gaze, "Would it make any difference if I did?"

He thought for a moment, "No… it surely would not"

"Then what's the point?" She asked as she left his side to go sit on the couch.

Mishca watched as Watari transferred a call to Matsuda's cellphone. L quickly grabbed it from his hands and answered with a fake name. His eyes went wide and he hung up shortly after. "Raye Penber's fiancé is missing" Gasps and comments could be heard from the men, some commented that it could be suicide. "Naomi Misora – she was a former FBI agent… who worked under me on the LABB murder cases…" Mishca gulped at this, she recognized the title from the papers, she glanced up and saw a drawn expression on Watari's face – he seemed upset, at the mentioning of that case. "The Naomi Misora I knew had great inner strength and was an excellent FBI agent, I think she'd try to go after KIRA…"

Mishca shot a glance at him, the way he spoke about this women made her upset. He respected her, and had no qualms about showing it. She sighed, she wished she could gain that kind of status with him. She stared into her cup as she stirred it, even though there was nothing to stir, the sugar had already dissolved. She was just a suspect to him… for god knows what at this point… but a suspect nonetheless. There was no way she'd ever gain that kind of respect from him. 'uughhh'. She caught herself… 'why do I care what he thinks?…'

She vaguely heard L say that they'd focus on who Penber was trailing and that he wanted to bug their homes, but she wasn't really listening – she was too caught up in her own thoughts.

She only started listening completely once she heard her name

"Out of courtesy to Chief Yagami, only myself, Mishca and the chief will watch his household. The rest of you will be watching the Kitamura household, reviewing the rest of the train tapes to see if you can find any of the Yagami's or Kitamura's captured, and manning the NPA office" Everyone except Mishca nodded their heads in agreement.

"Watari, please set up another hotel. We will need at least two monitoring rooms – once the bugs are set up, we will move to that hotel."

Ukita moved in close to Mishca and whispered, "He prefers working with you over anyone else here – it's hard not to notice you know"

She just nodded, was that jealousy or relief he was expressing? Either way it didn't really matter. She was convinced that L didn't want to work with her because she was good at what she did, he just wanted to keep an eye on her now…


	14. Chapter 13: Collateral Damage &

Chapter 13: Collateral damage and a kind gesture

A few days later…

She was raiding her hotel room frantically; going through every drawer, looking under every piece of furniture. "Where is it!" She shouted in frustration. Her watch had gone missing, she couldn't even think of the last time she remembered having it on. This was just what she needed right now, for some nobody to snatch up the watch – she was sure it wasn't cheap, and she would look so careless if she had really lost it.

Deciding it wasn't in her room, she dashed out the door and rushed up the stairs to L's room. If it wasn't in there, she wasn't sure where else to look. She reached the door, panting a little from the quick jog up the steps. She knocked a few times but no one answered the door. 'They probably already left for the new hotel, shit!' It wasn't that the missing watch was such a big deal, L even said they could craft another one, but she liked this watch, she didn't want another one. She jiggled the handle, hoping it would be open but expecting it to be locked. She was a little shocked when the door actually opened, stepping inside the room she saw that all the equipment had been taken out already and the furniture was pushed back into their original places. It had looked like housekeeping had already been through, but she was going to look anyway.

She searched the room for a few moments before she heard a cough from the bedroom, she froze, was somebody still here? She walked on the tips of her toes towards the door so she wouldn't make any noise, peaking in the crack of the door she saw Watari on a computer. "I gather you are doing well then?" she heard him speak, was he talking to her? She stayed quiet until she heard a familiar voice come over the speakers "Well? Well enough I suppose, for being locked up in a cell all damn day every day" Her eyes widened, 'Oh… my… god… that can't be' Her breath quickened and her heart raced, that couldn't possibly be who she thought it was. "Have you had a chance to consider what we last spoke about?" The voice snickered, "What? Forgiveness? Hardly. You should know me better than that Watari." Watari sighed heavily as he moved in his seat slightly, just enough for her to take a glimpse at the screen. It felt like her heart stopped, she leaned in a little closer to get a better look, but the door creaked at the pressure she placed on it. "Do you have company, Watari?" He glanced back at the door, shit, she was caught, she thought. "It appears I do, just a moment B" Watari got up and quickly opened the door, greeting her with a smile. "May I help you Mishca?" "Uhh.. um.. I, was trying to find my watch.. I'm sorry if I interrupted something…"

"Mishca?" The harsh voice questioned through the computer, Watari looked at her curiously. "Well Watari, let her in, I haven't seen a pretty girl in a very long time." Watari turned to face the computer, "Show some respect B, this is one of the detectives helping L on his current case." "Well, by all means, let her in." Watari opened the door and spoke softly, asking for her not to pay any attention to the man in the screen – he was an old friend, he had said.

Unsure, she walked in the room and gulped at the sight she saw on the computer. It was him… she breathed heavily as she examined his face, he had burn scars that traced his face and went down his neck. "Mishca, Mishca, Mishca… what a lllovveelllyyy name for sucha beautiful girl, don't you think, Watari?" Watari just nodded and went to sit back down, "Out of the way, old man, I want to see her" "That's enough, stop tormenting the poor girl." At this, he laughed manically –"What? Can't I have a conversation with someone other than you for once? Won't you let me speak with her?" Watari stared at the screen as B's eyes shifted back to Mishca's, a smile emerged from his lips, "So… Mishca… is working with the great L? How… interesting." He bore his eyes into her, she couldn't move, she couldn't speak. "How's that working for you?" He asked as he was smiling madly. This made her angry, knowing his true meaning so she spat back - "Hows… Hows being locked up working for you? Was… whatever you did, worth it?" His smile faded and his expression grew grim. "EVERYTHING, was worth it, even the collateral damage I caused… it was all, worth it, I wouldn't have changed a thing." Watari looked frightened, what had he done, letting these two speak, surely Mishca was going to be very upset after meeting such a strong personality. "How… how could any of it… be worth, where you are? … what you've… become?" He tilted his head, "What I've become? Oh my dear, don't presume to know me, this is who I've always been, and its all worth it because in the end, I WIN!" He shouted as the screen went black. Mishca was left standing there in pure shock, her eyes were wide and her mouth had fell open.

Watari walked towards her and placed a hand on either side of her shoulders, "I, apologize for that Mishca. You should not have had to experience such a thing." Her eyes went to his, "Oh… um… right. Don't worry about it Watari… it's nothing, really. I'm fine, it just… shocked me a little." He nodded his head and let her go, as she turned around she spotted her watch on the night stand. She clumsily reached for it and rushed out the door.

She ran back down the stairs as fast as she could and slammed her door behind her once she reached her room. She slid down to the floor and let a sob out. She sat there in a ball as she weeped.

"Collateral damage" she enunciated, that's all she was.

Later that day…

She knocked on the new hotel room door and was let in by Watari. She didn't say a word as she entered, "There you are" L said as he noticed her lateness. "You're quite late" she just nodded her head and sat as far away from him as she could get away with.

He paused to look at her… she seemed… withdrawn and dejected, what had happened?

"…. Since you missed the first half… I'll bring you up to speed…" He paused again, expecting her to look at him as he explained, but she just stared at the screens. "… the person who installed the cameras said that Light checks if people have entered his room – other than that, nothing suspicious was found in his room. Noone else in the house has shown anything to comment on as of yet."

"Oh, and Yagami-san, I hear your son is interested in the KIRA case and is following it quite closely… have you, shared any information with him?"

Mishca eyed the Chief at this point, even though she didn't want to be there, that fact was exceedingly interesting.

"Of course not! I only told them that I was the head of the investigation, I would never share confidential information!.. and anyway, I'm rarely home as it is. When I am, alls I can do is sleep."

"All right.." L responded.

They watched the screen as Light entered his room with a paperbag. He removed a smut magazine from it and plopped down on his bed. Mishca smirked at this, this had to be so awkward for the Chief.

"This… is the last thing I thought I'd see my son doing."

"Well… he is 17… it's only normal… but… it looks so… forced."

"Ryuzaki! Don't tell me you think that my son is a suspect!"

"Well, yes. That's why we've placed bugs in the house. Everyone in the two households are currently suspects.

The three of them watched the screens, "Mishca, why is it, that you were so late today?" L asked annoyed.

Her voice matched his level of annoyance "Well, you did choose a hotel that's so far away from mine. You know I have to walk here or try to catch a taxi…" she rolled her eyes, he really didn't want to annoy her today – she was ready to explode.

"Mm… it may be wise, for you to bring your things here then." He popped candy in his mouth "mmm.. that way… we won't have to keep waiting on you and catching you up on things… as a matter of fact, I will have Watari bring your things later."

'Uuughhh!' "Do I get a say in this at all?"

"Mm.. no, afraid not. Mmmm, the Yagamis are watching tv now for dinner…" L reached for his phone, "Aizawa, are the Kitamura's watching tv? Very well then…" he hung up and told Watari to run the message.

Moments later…

"Interpol is so stupid… surely KIRA would see right through this, why would you tell everyone how many investigators are coming to help with the case… so stupid!"

L smiled at this and Mishca was intently focused on Light –

"Your son is quite intelligent…"

"Hmm? Oh, yes, well, he wants to be a detective some day and join the NPA."

"Really?" Mishca asked.

Yagami laughed a little, "Yes well, he is very determined."

Mishca shot L a look trying to gauge his thoughts on the chiefs' son. He gazed back at her and nodded his head, agreeing that it was quite interesting.

Light finished his dinner quickly, the rest of the night he just studied. "Your son hasn't turned on the tv or radio since dinner…"

"Yes, well, he has to study for entrance exams. It's a very stressful time"

"Hmm" Mishca and L both breathed out

A few hours passed and Watari came in with her things. She jumped up to help him. "This really wasn't necessary Watari – here, let me take these… where do I…?"

"Do you wish me to show her to her room Ryuzaki?"

L had already stood, "No, I can manage. Thank you, Mishca, please come with me."

L led her into a room on the other side of the suite, "I hope… this will suffice."

She looked around, the room was gorgeous. She placed her items on the bed and went to a large window across the way. She opened the curtains and gasped.

L put his hands in his pockets and looked down at his feet, "Yes.. well.. I knew you had said you liked balconies… so I was sure Watari booked a hotel that had one for you…"

She looked back at him, "You… got this one, for me?"

He looked uncomfortable. "Yes well… it seems to make you happy… and… I need you happy… for this case.. so.. it only made sense."

Even though she had an unimaginably hard day, this made her smile.. it touched her.. he actually thought of her… She walked up to him, wanting to hug him to show that she was grateful.. but she wasn't sure she should. Ignoring her instinct she did it anyway. She slowly wrapped her arms around him and felt him go rigid, she let go quickly after but smiled up at him when she broke away "Thank you, L… that was… really sweet of you."

He smiled slightly and began walking towards the door "I will let you get settled then."

* * *

><p>Chapter 13….B…. had to do it… couldn't resist! So we got to see current BB instead of flashback BB – :D yay!<p>

And I love how L's and Mishca's emotions are all over the place : )


	15. Chapter 14: Caught

Chapter 14: Caught

Mishca was in her room relaxing after a long day, her body strewn out over the plush king size bed as she watched a local tv station. She couldn't help but go over the recent events in her head – it was hard to completely relax when she couldn't get away from the place. A few days had passed since they began observing the Yagami household – the family didn't appear to do anything out of the ordinary, their actions all seemed to be very clean. Almost too clean, L had commented. It was very strange, Mishca had to agree – they seemed perfect, they seemed _innocent_... nothing had gone wrong during the days they watched them – like they knew they were being watched. It was quite possible, she thought, that at least one of them would find a hidden camera. And if they had known of one, they were keeping quiet, hoping to slide under the radar. She had mentioned this possibility to L, he only nodded and shrugged her off. She remembered being annoyed that he didn't seem to listen to her, 'then again he may just be sick of hearing things he's already thought of' she sneered

Only an embezzler and a purse snatcher were killed on the 8th, and then three small time thieves on the 10th. Yes, there were still criminals being murdered, but why had KIRA chosen such small time criminals? They weren't his typical targets. Which means that KIRA was put in a situation where he couldn't kill his normal target… which could only mean that KIRA was surely in one of the households. She had mentioned this to L as well, but only received a snide remark in return, "none of them have watched the news very often Mishca, and when they did watch tv, it was a drama or during one of lights study sessions. They showed no sign of suspicious activity– we would have seen it… I wouldn't have missed something like that." She remembered raising her eyebrow at him and asking him "Oh really?" That was the first time she had seen his face go red, he didn't appreciate her comment one bit and snapped back at her "I didn't say there wasn't still a probability that one of them is KIRA, I just said that they haven't shown us anything!" She had really gotten under his skin, but hell, he deserved it, she thought. Needless to say, she didn't think they'd be on talking terms the next day.

She fell asleep as her thoughts faded away…

She lay in bed, the sun glinting through the windows of the hotel. The smell of her perfume was mixing with sugar and strawberries, the smell pleased her. She sighed happily as she stretched slightly – jumping as her hand grazed something. She looked upwards to find the source and was greeted with deep brown eyes and a warm smile. He caressed her face lightly "Good morning beautiful" she smiled "Morning Rue."

He quickly removed his hand from her face and his expression fell. "Why? … Why would you call me that?" His strained expression sent panic throughout her body.

"_L_?" She looked at him in pure shock, her mouth parted and eyes wide.

By now he was standing beside the bed, getting ready to leave.

"Stop hiding from the truth, Mishca. It will only hurt you more."

He was walking towards the door when she shouted "But I don't understand!"

He reached for the door, looking back he smiled faintly but the sadness was still visible in his eyes. He looked to the floor and then back to her - "It was always me, Mishca… don't you see? Even when it _wasn't_…. it was _always_ me." The door closed behind him softly…

She sprang up into a seated position as her heart was readying to jump out of her chest. Her breath was coming in quick spurts, with tears running down her face. She cupped her hand over her mouth trying to prevent the sobs from leaking out, but it didn't work. A sob escaped her mouth as she tried blocking the dream out of her head. This was new… and it held a truth that she so desperately tried to forget.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock on the door, she desparately hoped that it wasn't L, ,she couldn't face him right now. She slid off the bed on to her feet, wiping the tears from her eyes she went to answer the door. She only opened it slightly so she could close it quickly if it was. "Evening, Mishca. May I come in?" Watari's voice came. Watari wanted to speak to her? This couldn't be good… she rarely saw him speak to anyone. "Yes, of course, come on in." She let him enter, "I'd prefer to speak on the balcony… less chance for the others to overhear." "Uh… ok?" What was going on? She followed him out on the balcony, grabbing a sweater as she did so. She watched him, nervously.

"I think to be a patient man…" He stared out at the view from her balcony with his hands clasped behind his back, "Would you agree with that statement, Mishca?"

She stared at the back of his head, worried at where the conversation was going. "From what I've seen… yes… of course I would agree…"

"I also like to think I can judge ones character fairly well, and I'm certain that you are a trustworthy and honest young lady… otherwise, I would not have let you near Ryuzaki."

She began to breathe faster, 'oh no'.

"With that being said, I also have great faith in humanity…. And I can sense that you are a good person, and would wish no harm to come to Ryuzaki, am I correct in assuming this?"

"Undoubtedly" She said softly, her heart beat faster and faster at each word he spoke.

"Then I ask you, for your honest answer to a few questions. No explanations are required, a simple yes or no will suffice."

"Uh.. o… ok, what is it?"

"Before I inquire to these questions, I should tell you, the answers will determine whether or not you stay on this case. If you answer correctly, you will remain here to assist Ryuzaki… if you answer wrongly… I'm afraid there will be consequences. With this knowledge, are you prepared to answer my questions?"

'Shit shit shit SHIT!' … She sighed heavily, "Yes"

She recoiled when she agreed, her palms getting sweaty and her body overheating… 'please don't pass out…please….'

"I am pleased you have not refused…Very well then… firstly…Are you the same Mishca I spoke with over a year ago, in reference to an entirely different case?"

Her eyes shifted to the side, 'damn…' she had been caught… what was she going to do? She couldn't lie… especially to Watari of all people.

"..Yes…" she spoke ever so softly.

She watched as Watari nodded his head. "and… did you recognize the man that spoke to you the day you were searching for your watch?"

"Yes"

Watari breathed out, she cringed at the sound. "You met the man before?"

"Yes"

'O dear god… I'm never going to see the light of day again….' She was screaming on the inside, how could she have been so careless?

"Were the relations… anything else besides professional?"

"Yes.. but –"

"Please… no explanations."

"For this particular question, please take a moment, and be sure you give me your upmost, brutally honest answer."

"Uhm.. okay?"

"Excluding feelings in the parameters of professional relations, have you developed any emotional attachment towards L? This includes feelings of friendship or other _familiarity_…" He emphasized the last word as if hinting to the question he really wanted to ask…

Her eyes followed as she outlined the face of her watch with the tip of her index finger… this was not a question she had expected… Days before she would have considered L as just a colleague… but lately… her mind was wandering to him, it wasn't just that she was comparing him to someone else… it was more that she typically favored him in those comparisons… even if the two were… similar, L had always been the one who came out on top. And then there was that dream… showing her the reason for her preference… she never loved B to begin with… because she never knew B. She couldn't hide from it… there was definitely some emotions there… not that she wanted to admit it, but she had to. Watari would know if she lied.

"… Yes."

At that Watari spun around to face her. "I…, am disappointed that I had to ask these questions of you… I was hoping, a few days after that incident, you would have come to me to tell me the truth yourself... although, I can see your reasoning behind not doing so…"

"I.."

"I thank you for your honesty. If you had been deceitful, I would not have let you stay…. And… I would prefer, if L stayed ignorant of this conversation… your involvement in that particular case… and with that man, should be of minimal concern at this point. You should know, if he were to gain that knowledge, he would surely be displeased."

"Wait, you're not going to tell him?"

"And risk his attention being diverted elsewhere at such a crucial time? That's far too dangerous, you of all people should recognize that his life is on the line, any _distraction_ could very well be fatal."

'Is he still talking about B…?'

"You said that he would be… displeased? Why exactly is that?"

Watari smiled, "That's something I leave to you to figure out"

He began walking off the balcony, once they both were back inside the room, he quietly spoke

"One more thing Mishca"

"What is it?" She said feeling relieved.

He looked down, showing that he had some difficulty with whatever he was going to say next.

"When you knew… him… was he… a good man?"

She paused, thinking hard. She had never even thought to ask that of herself. She was saddened as she came to her answer. "In the beginning I thought he was… but in the end… he showed me who he truly was – it was such a stark contrast to who I thought I had known…." She shook her head, " he was a horrid man."

"I, understand." He bowed his head slightly before leaving the room. She closed the door gently behind him, letting her arm linger on the door as she breathed a sigh of relief. 'He really didn't want L to know? Thank god… and I got off easy! He may know of my connection… but he has no idea of what I know.. I need to be extra careful now… no more clumsy slip ups!'

She sat back on her bed, mind racing. She couldn't help but notice how depressed he had looked when she had described B…. and she couldn't help but think there was some hidden reason for some of the things he mentioned.

* * *

><p>Yay, Watari confronted Mishca! I couldn't let too much get revealed to Watari or have him tell L… that would be no fun later on in the story ;)<p>

And OMG Mishca finally realized that she has feeling for L… "Squeal!" So excited... and it looks like someone else has noticed too :D


	16. Chapter 15: Human

Chapter 15: Human

She didn't know where she was, all she could see was a dimly lit corridor that seemed to go on forever. There were no windows and no doors that she could find. She walked cautiously straight in front of her, there had to be an exit. It wasn't long before she saw him, standing alone in the center of the corridor. He felt miles away, "HEY!" she tried calling out to him, but no sound came from her lips. Frightened, she tried again, "HEY!".. still… nothing. What was going on? She began walking towards the slouched over, dark haired man, he looked just as lost as she did. The low lights bounced off his soft features and she couldn't help but smile at how handsome he looked right at that moment.

Just then she saw another figure moving behind him, something metallic gleamed in the soft light…was that…. "no!" she screamed although no sound came out. She began running towards him as fast as she could as she watched the figure moving closer to him. As she grew nearer she saw a similar man with harsher features, holding on a knife steady in his grasp. He moved closer, and closer. "No! L!" At that, the soft featured man turned around and smiled at her, did he hear her? "Watch out!" she tried screaming, but it didn't appear that he heard her that time. ' Oh god please..' was all that ran through her mind. She ran faster than she ever thought she could, but still couldn't get to him before she witnessed the harsh man grab the other from behind roughly, and thrust the knife into the man's flesh. The smile he had once had on his face vanished as blood began to seep through his white shirt. "L!" She screamed as loud as she could as she watched him fall to the ground, the other man just smiled madly at her. She was getting closer, oh how she was going to hurt that man for doing such a thing… she was almost in reach of him when her breath shortened and her chest began to hurt. Her hearts' palpations began to race and breathing became increasingly difficult. She had to stop, it was too painful. She fell to her knees and grasped at her chest, "What?" was all she could manage to get out. Seconds later he was in front of her laughing hysterically, watching as she watched the blood pool around L grow bigger. The crazed man bit down on the knife he had used to slay his rival as he kneeled in front of her. He laughed manically as he set the blade down. "I told you…. I _win_…" Was the last thing she heard before her heart stopped and her head hit the ground.

Her eyes shot open as she sprang upwards in her bed, she was breathing short, heavy breaths as tears slid down her face. She looked around the room, wide-eyed, making sure she had truly been dreaming. Her eyes reached the side of her bed to find L sitting there, a bewildered look plastered his face. "What.. are you doing.. in here?" she gasped out between her sobs, "You called for me…" She tried to slow her breathing, "I what?" He stared at her with worried eyes, "Yes.. you did. Twice actually… fairly loudly I might add… I thought you were hurt..are you alright?" She stared into his eyes, it was a dream she told herself.. L is sitting right next to you and B is locked away in a cell somewhere… it wasn't real. "I.. I was just dreaming..I.. I'm okay.. I think.." His eyes moved slightly back and forth, searching her eyes for the truth. Evidently he didn't believe her, because he didn't leave. "What… was your dream about?" Her mouth dropped a little and she looked to the other side so she wouldn't have to see him. "…You…you were too far away… I couldn't get to you and you didn't hear me…" "Continue" he pressed, "I thought I could get to you in time but.." she let a sob out "he killed you… I watched as you fell to the ground and the blood… it was everywhere… and… and then KIRA got me… I … I couldn't…. I couldn't save you" she whispered the last sentence, not wanting to speak of it anymore. She felt movement on the bed and saw him out of the corner of her eye, "Mishca…" he spoke softly, "I don't need saving… I'm fine, I'm right here." She let more tears escape her eyes, "I know you're here…but.." "No buts, Mishca. I'm alive and well, you shouldn't be so emotional over something that didn't really happen." At this she cried harder, he just didn't understand. He sat there and watched her, surely it wasn't that big of a deal? "Will you… be fit enough to continue work on this case?... do you… need… someone… to talk to?" Her head whipped around, "What? Like a shrink? Are you serious? It was a nightmare L! Why can't you see I'm just upset? I am human you know!" They were both quiet for a while before she spoke again "Is it so hard to believe, that someone could actually care about you, and be upset about seeing what I had just seen?" He stood up and put his hands in his pockets, "Yes." He said bluntly and walked out the door.

She let a few more tears out, further upset that it had seemed he was only concerned about the case. A few moments later he came back in the room with a large slice of cake. He sat back down next to her and picked up a piece with the fork, she just stared at him as he lifted the fork to her mouth, "cake will make it better… you'll see… take it" She stared at him, thinking he may have just proven her theory wrong. "Please… Mishca.. please eat the cake" She opened her mouth and let him feed her the cake. He pulled the fork back and watched, he picked up another piece, "Why are you doing this?" she asked quietly. "Mmm.. I'm quite certain it's because… I care about you as well." Her mouth dropped a little in shock, he must have noticed because he smiled and spoke softly "It appears…. That I am also human.." She couldn't help but smile at this. A few moments passed and the cake, along with her tears, were gone. L leaned over and placed the plate on the nightstand and returned to his original spot. She reached forward and wrapped her arms around him, his breath stopped for a second and his heart beat faster. He slowly placed one of his arms around her waist and hugged back. "Thank you, L" He gulped and breathed in the scent of her hair, "You're welcome". Shortly after they released each other from the embrace, L told her that she should get ready – the other members would be arriving shortly to go over the results of the surveillance. 'How long had I been asleep?' she wondered… she hoped that her sleeping patterns would improve.

Ls POV

He heard the water from her shower turn on as he plopped back in his chair with a heavy sigh. "What's the matter, Ryuzaki?" Watari asked. "I still can't figure her out Watari, she's frustrating and has no reservations about saying what she thinks, you saw the way she spoke to me the other day? Like I'd actually miss something…" Watari stayed quiet, letting him finish. "She's intelligent and a great detective… but so emotional… she's so competitive and antagonizing and she always shows concern for my wellbeing. We've been playing this tug of war game ever since this case started…" he sighed, "It seems you are enjoying her company" Watari mentioned, at this L turned to face him. "Now you see, that's just the problem… that's 'what's the matter', I DO enjoy her company, and I shouldn't. I still don't know why she is so suspicious, but it hasn't stopped me from…" he trailed off. "From what, Ryuzaki?" "… from.. letting myself care about her… I must admit… it is a strange, unfamiliar feeling… she frightens me Watari." He looked shocked, "Frightens you?" he asked. "Yes… I'm quite concerned… what is she going to pull out of me next?"

Later that day…

L watched as Mishca sat next to Tatum as the others settled in. They hadn't seen each other in days and were talking up a storm. 'What's with these two?' he wondered. Him and Mishca had just told one another that they cared for each other, but he was still finding himself annoyed at the sight of a different kind of caring. What did they actually mean, when they said that anyway? He had no idea, and his mood was going sour. He was tired of seeing those two together, he had been so relieved, when Tatum had gone to observe the Kitamura household… but he was back now, and it made him tense.

The room quieted as L began to speak

"I've studied the surveillance footage closely… and my conclusion is… that of the people in the Kitamura and Yagami families, suspicious activity was observed in..."

It looked as if Chief Yagami was going to keel over before hearing the rest of the conclusion, he was sweating buckets.

"Nobody. We will remove the bugs and cameras"

"So, still no suspects?" Matsuda asked

"I thought we were on the right track with Raye Penbers Targets…" Ukita said.

"Well – none of them were seen on the Yamanote line videos" Aizawa added

Chief Yagami interjected, "Don't give up, we'll just have to start over, back at square one."

"Ahem.. please don't misunderstand me when I say no suspicious activity was observed… even if one of them is KIRA, they are simply not making any mistakes – Mishca even brought this up during observation of the Yagami household… it's quite possible, they had some knowledge of being watched, and acted accordingly"

Aizawa gritted his teeth at Mishca, he was really fed up with the team being bested by her –

"KIRA's putting criminals to death as always, without showing us how."

"So, you're saying one of them could still be KIRA?" Yagami asked

"As I said, there is a 5% probability."

For the next few minutes, Mishca watched L as the others tried to brainstorm ideas for getting more evidence on KIRA. L didn't seem to be listening at all – he was in his head again, she wanted to know what he was thinking, badly.

" I think, that will do for today. I'm sure you all could use some rest, it doesn't appear any of you have slept very much in the past few days. Please, go home to your families." L interrupted. As they left, everyone thanked him and assured him that they'd catch KIRA.


	17. Chapter 16: Gambit

Chapter 16: Gambit

She watched from her bedroom doorway as he played chess alone by the window, as much as she tried not to compare him this time, she couldn't help it. B didn't play chess… ever. Now that she thought about it, he didn't really do much of anything. She felt a sense of relief; there were definitely differences between the two… she noticed there were things B copied right down to the smallest detail… but there were other things he missed completely… like the fact he plays chess alone and doesn't eat jam of any kind right out of the jar. She smiled, pleased that they weren't identical and even more pleased with herself, for refusing to call him Ryuzaki. The name didn't do him justice…

Her smile faded as she thought back on the past few days. They had left her completely vulnerable and overemotional. Everything was going wrong – this isn't how she wanted things to happen. She was just supposed to help with the case, that was it. The focus wasn't supposed to be on her, she was supposed to stay in the background and be sure not to make things complicated. None of that was working. It was bad enough that Watari figured out her connection to B, but now, now she had gone and ruined everything by saying she cared for L… she hadn't even realized she said it until he returned the sentiment minutes later. But there it was, black & white, no place to hide from it, they cared about each other. What that hell did that mean? They cared about each other? It was normal, she supposed, that being around someone for a while would create that sort of attachment, but what kind of caring was it? She hadn't thought of that, and he had actually hugged her back instead of freezing. Their relationship had crossed out of professional right at that point – what was she going to do? She thought, she couldn't let him get any closer. The closer he got to her, the more danger she put him in. What was she thinking anyway? She had been way too casual with him and he'd definitely find it odd if she changed her ways now. What if she left? Just packed up her bags and flew back to the states? No.. she couldn't do that, right after Watari confronted her about B? No way… even he would connect that to her hiding something even more paramount. She concluded that she was just going to have to suck it up, and be her usual self and do her best to hide her scars and what she knew… and minus the river of tears she hoped – She was tired of crying because of B, and damn it, she was stronger than that…

"If you're going to continue to stare, you might as well come and play a match." His cool voice came, startling her out of her thoughts. 'Here we go…'

She walked over to him and sat in the chair on the other side of the small table. "Do you always play against yourself?"

"Yes…mmm" he said as he popped a sweet into his mouth, "Although, sometimes, Watari will play against me when he has time."

"Your move" he said after moving a piece.

The two played for a few minutes before he spoke again "You're good"

She laughed slightly. "Not really. Why do you like it anyway?"

"Different levels of logic and probability – you always have to think two moves in advance, determine what your opponent will do next and how to respond to it"

" I'm no fan of chess – poker is more my style"

He placed down his next piece with a little more force, "Poker? Child's play."

"Childs play? How so? With chess, all the puzzle pieces are right in front of you, you don't have any missing information. You can think of all the ways your opponent will move next." She said as she captured his queen. He stared at her, not happy at the move she made. He made his next move as he listened.

"With poker, you don't have all the information. There's so much more you have to figure out, making the puzzle more difficult to solve. In chess, you always know exactly what pieces you're going to get to use, in poker, you have no idea what cards are going to be dealt to you."

He nodded as she captured another piece. He clenched his jaw as he made his next move, knowing what was going to happen next.

"There's probability, a good amount of subjectivity versus logic, betting to make it all the more fun, and my favorite part, is the bluffing, 'Liar's Poker' some call it. You get to see other people's tells, it's a combination of playing the cards and playing the person that's playing with you, and vice versa. You get to test the other person, how far will they go, to win the pot?... Checkmate, by the way."

He stared at the board, "bravo"

"And I'm sure, either game is only as good as the people you play it with." She smiled up at him.

"I suppose, you are right. We will have to play sometime."

She watched as he put the pieces back in their rightful places. "It's pretty late, where is everyone? Shouldn't we be going over the case?"

"Mm.. no. There's nothing on the agenda today, not for the team anyway."

"Wait, so you're doing it all by yourself?"

"I will only be researching To-ho university, I may have found a way to get more evidence on KIRA, maybe even get him to admit to me that he is KIRA."

"Wait –you're not going to do what I think you're going to do, are you?"

"If I go under the ruse of being a first year student at To-ho, it's likely Light Yagami and myself will run into eachother. I could befriend him, and get crucial information."

She stared at him, worried. "That's a dangerous gambit L. You're playing with fire, do you have a death wish?"

"No, I quite value my life. But this is the way it has to be, we won't get anything more from bugs or surveillance, there has to be direct contact."

"But if he is KIRA and finds out that you are L –" He cut her off

"I would tell him I am L." he said bluntly.

Her mouth dropped, "You'd what? Please don't, you're going to get yourself killed!"

"KIRA needs a name as well as a face Mishca, he'll only have one – being that nobody besides Watari and myself know my true identity."

She gulped.

"However… I am.. glad, that you not wish me killed… but this is how I will defeat KIRA."

"But I don't trust him… KIRA's human… he can kill without heart attacks too you know."

"If you are so concerned about my safety, you should apply to To-ho as well."

She was surprised, "I.. what?"

"Yes… yes… now that I think of it, it would be good to have you there as a spectator.. you may see something I don't from a ways away…" he placed his finger on his lower lip…

"Won't it look a little odd… following you and Light around everywhere?"

"Well, don't make it obvious. Blend in… from the looks of you, that shouldn't be hard."

She raised an eyebrow, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing offensive… you are just young and attractive… people will be drawn to you. Use that to your advantage… so it's agreed, you will attend To-ho aswell."

"But, I didn't say –"

At that Watari opened the door and let Matsuda and Tatum enter. They were talking loudly as they crashed on the couch. Mishca turned to them, "you guys know there's no work today right?"

"Sweet!" Tatum exclaimed, as Mishca left L to go sit with the two.

L watched as she began conversing with the two – it never failed, if Tatum was in the room it felt like he didn't even exist.

They were making plans to go out, a dinner and a movie it sounded like, he heard her say that it'd be good to get away from there for a while, he was hurt by the comment, thinking there was a different meaning to it. He had grown accustom to having her around… he enjoyed having her around.

He watched as Tatum left the room as Mishca gave Matsuda a strange look.

"You know Mishca, now that we all know L, we have to be extra careful when we go out. Someone could grab us and torture us for information or something, isn't that scary? So, here's what you do if –"

Tatum walked back in and saw the look on Mishca's face, he laughed "What in the world?" L watched as she raised her hand, silencing him, "Hold on Tatum, Matsu here was just about to tell me the importance of being careful, and what to do if we were ever tortured for information on L…" Mishca glared at Matsuda, waiting for him to continue, "Oh, yea, well, like I was saying …" L watched as Tatum wacked Matsuda in the back of his head, "Oowwww! What was that for?" "It would be wise, for you not to finish that sentence." "But why? They're good tips!" Tatum rolled his eyes, "Mishca, of all people, doesn't need any tips, Matsuda." He said bluntly as Mishca walked towards her room, L eyeing her the whole time. "I'm going to get ready, shouldn't take too long."

He got up and followed her, he was curious now. He shut the door behind him, and saw her looking through the dresser. "Ahem." She jumped and turned around "L! I'm trying to get ready, you shouldn't be in here." She was relieved she hadn't undressed yet. "Yes.. I'll leave shortly, but I couldn't help but overhear your conversation." She laid two outfit options down on the bed, "What about it?" "It was implied… that you had been tortured before… is that true?" She responded without hesitating. "Yes… more than once, actually." His eyes grew large, "What for?" She laughed, "What makes you think I can tell you?" He looked to the ground, "Right… sorry. Was it worth it? Not saying anything, I mean." She looked up at him, "The second time was…I'd do it again in a heartbeat." "What about the first?" She paused, this was too close, maybe she should have lied. "The first… wasn't looking for any information." He raised his eyebrow, "Then, why –" "Could you leave now? You're making us late, we want to make the 8 oclock showing." "Oh..yes.. of course." At that he turned and left the room. She sighed heavily as she realized she was playing a dangerous gambit of her own.

She chose a long, fitted vneck sweater, skinny jeans and a pair of black leather boots. She wanted to look pretty, but it was too cold for anything else. She curled her hair quickly and placed a head band to help keep her hair from blowing around too much from the wind outside. She put in some hoop earrings and did her makeup – she hadn't done a full get up in a while, and it made her feel good. She looked in the mirror and smiled at what she saw. She opened the door and re-entered the main area of the hotel suite.

L watched as she came back out into the room, he couldn't help but stare. She had never done her hair, or any of that before. He gulped as he looked her up and down, she never dressed in such tight clothing before either, he thought. His palms were getting sweaty and he placed them on his knee caps to control it. He watched as the two men left, saying they'd go grab Matsuda's car.

As the door shut he watched as she reached for her purse. "Mishca?" He asked as she had her hand on the door knob. "Yes?" "When will you be returning?" She turned around, "I don't know – why, is there something we have to go over?" "No." "Then why does it matter?" "It doesn't, I suppose." "Are you sure you don't want to come?" He nodded his head, and she left. It's not that he wanted to go… he just wanted her to _stay_.

For the rest of the night he researched the University, resisting the urge to break into the surveillance cameras of every local restaurant in order to find her.


	18. Chapter 17: A Matter of Victory

Chapter 17: A Matter of Victory

I should have told you guys in the beginning, this is a long story… not that you haven't noticed. =P I love the death note story so I don't want to butcher it (too badly, anyway) or rush through it just to get to some REAL romance (not the fluffly stuff flying around between L & Mishca right now) – this isn't a wam bam thank you mam kind of story – although they are awesome, this story just isn't one of those.

And BTW, I love all the feedback, makes me want to write more, so thank you =)

And now, back to the story! ;)

He would have been up all night anyway, just like any other night, but this night was different. He was actually alone this time. It had been so long since he was actually alone… well.. Watari was there, but that was it. And it just didn't feel right… something was missing, no, it was someone and he knew exactly who it was. He couldn't help but review the earlier events, they had debated over chess and poker and she won – he didn't even have any defense. It wasn't often, that someone had gained victory over him, no matter how minor the topic. Although unfamiliar, he liked it, and craved for more conversations like that. His thoughts switched to how she looked before she left, it wasn't just that she looked beautiful, there was something else that stirred in the bottom of his stomach. He couldn't quite tell if he liked it, or even what it was for that matter. He flashed back to when Mishca told him not to concern himself with her scars… he quickly linked this to what he heard earlier. She did have more scars that she wasn't showing, and they were no doubt due to whoever had tortured her. How he wanted to know who did it, to know why it had happened, what information was so important that they had to harm her? And who was so important to her to protect?... And what about the first one, the one who wasn't after anything? What could it have possibly been done for? He wanted badly to find out so he could make whoever did it pay.

And then there was the other lingering thought, the one that made it difficult to watch as the minutes passed slowly on the clock. She had looked that stunning to him, and she was out on the town having fun, - he scolded himself for wanting to search every restaurant to find her – all's he had to do was track her down with her watch– why hadn't he thought of that? He felt stupid, for the first time in a very, very long time – why did she have this effect on him? What was she doing? Was she okay? Was it a date, and Matsuda was tagging along? Why was he feeling like this? He crumpled a piece of paper in his hand, the one that had his notes of the university entrance exam on it, he went back to hoping she wasn't Tatum's – why was he being so possessive? He wanted to call her and check in, but decided not to, figuring it would only anger her.

Hours passed before she finally returned to the hotel room. She passed by him quietly, he mentioned the date and time of the entrance exam in an effort for conversation. She only nodded her head as she walked by, saying good night and locking herself away in her room. She really wanted nothing to do with him tonight, he thought, only further proving his earlier deduction of her needing time away from him. He put a few sugar cubes in his mouth as he looked down feeling depressed. He had hoped, she would have lain next to him on the couch again – he hated admitting that he enjoyed that immensely.

A few days later at the Entrance Exam at To-ho University

Mishca sat uncomfortably in the exam room, she hated these chairs. How was anyone supposed to focus on anything being so damn uncomfortable? She stared down at the cover page of the exam and then scanned the room to find L and Light. She was number 210 so they were ahead of her a couple rows. She could see that Light was sitting there nonchalantly as if it was a coloring book in front of him. She scanned and found L, he was hard to miss with his messy hair sticking up all over the place. She let out a breath of air, 'Even here he refuses to sit normally – I wonder if the proctor will yell at him?' Not a moment later she heard a man in the front of the room shout "Number 162, sit properly!" She couldn't help but giggle as he ignored the demand. "You may begin" the proctor announced, she flipped through the pages remembering that L told her not to answer everything correctly – make a few mistakes, he had said. She was angry when he told her to skew her answers, but she found that whoever got the highest score would become the freshman representative – she assumed either L or Light would attain it, however it was quite possible that they could tie. 'That'd be awkward' she thought to herself.

4 hours later

The exam had finished and everyone piled out of the room, Mishca didn't bother waiting for L, knowing that it could jeopardize his plan if Light saw the two walking together. She decided to walk around for a while, she wasn't anxious to go back to the hotel. She felt cooped up, she needed some fresh air.

Back at the hotel

"How did the exam go Ryuzaki?" Watari asked as he placed a new assortment of sweets in front of him.

Picking at the options, he replied "The questions were quite simple –"

Watari nodded and then changed the topic

"Ryuzaki, there has been another note left by a prisoner, we've just received it today."

L turned around in his seat, not expecting KIRA to write anything more. "You should have told me that first, Watari. Is it KIRA?" He was excited, maybe he was letting L see another clue?

"No -The prisoner is still alive at the moment, this is something else."

L's face fell, "Very well, then it's of no concern to the case, I don't care to see it."

Watari cleared his throat, "I think, you will want to read this" He leaned forward and left the note beside L's dessert filled plate. "It addresses you… directly."

L looked up at Watari confused, not knowing what it could be, he quickly grabbed for it. His eyes scanned the page quickly, and had to re-read it a few times.

L,

You may think you have won in our little game and that it

Has been over for some time, but trust me when I say the

Game has never stopped, and you sitting idle has allowed me

To gain the advantage. I've learned a very important piece

Of information lately which has sealed my victory over you.

Information that you and that old man are lacking….

x x x

Will you be able to see _beyond_ the engravings, or will

You become the death of your little angel of justice?

I wait for the day the monster overcomes you.

x x x

L continued staring at the note, trying to decipher what it meant. "What do you think it means Ryuzaki?"

"I… have no idea. There's no hidden codes and I'm sure he chose his words wisely. It appears he thinks I will let evil overcome my high sense of justice… but for what reason? What is he getting at?..."

He handed off the note back to Watari - "Watari, file this away. I don't want any of the members finding it. They will assume it's related to KIRA."

"But what about the meaning?"

He sighed, "He's just tormenting me from his cell – he's completely gone mad, this letter makes absolutely no sense… if anything comes of it, I will investigate it, but for now, capturing KIRA is priority."

Just then, Mishca came into the hotel suite as Watari disappeared into another room – he was always doing that, she thought. "Did you have a good walk, Mishca?"

"How'd you know?"

He just looked at her and pointed to his wrist, indicating her watch. "Oh.. right.. I forgot about that. It was lovely, a bit cold, but it was so relaxing to get some fresh air."

"The next time you decide to get some fresh air, please let either myself or Watari know. If it hadn't been for that watch, I would have thought KIRA got you."

"Oh.. yea.. of course… sorry. Did you see the campus? They have so many things, I'm really excited about how big the tennis courts are – I think I will join the team… "

L's head shot up, "Tennis?"

"Yea, didn't you say to blend in?"

"I did… but I had no idea you played"

She laughed, "Is that so hard to believe?"

"No.. I guess not. I quite enjoy the sport myself."

"Oh really? That's interesting…" She thought back to when she asked B to play a match with her, he refused… said it was a stupid game.

"Interesting? How so?"

"It will be interesting.. how you react, when I beat you at it"

He raised an eyebrow at her, "I would win."

"Well, we'll just have to see about that." She said as she got up.

"We should be getting our exam results in about a week or two, then when we get accepted, the entrance ceremony will be on April 5th"

"Wow, that's a ways away." She said as she walked towards her bedroom.

"Yes, we will have to find other ways to track him between that time… although that may prove to be difficult with Chief Yagami's constant complaints."

"Well, it is his son after all….I'm going to go wind down in the bath, my legs are killing me from walking so much."

He just nodded and watched as she shut and locked the door behind her.

He couldn't help but be excited about the possible tennis match between the two – he hadn't played in a while but he was sure he'd have his victory over her.


	19. Chapter 18: Reality

OH MY GOD! Ten days without a new chapter! :*( SORRY!

Please keep in mind that there is a HUGE gap between surveillance of the households and the entrance ceremony at To-Ho - I have a few months to play with here ;)

Chapter 18: Reality

By the time she got out of the bath it was pitch black outside, she didn't even bother to look at the clock as she dressed. She chose to wear a t-shirt, a pair of shorts, and a cute pair of pink socks. She didn't want to wear socks at all, the truth was, she hated socks, but she couldn't allow L to see what was on the bottoms of her feet – even if she was overheated, she had to wear them. She left her hair wet, hoping it would cool down some of her body temperature.

She walked out to the main area of the suite to find L sitting by the window going through some papers. She decided not to bother him and walked over to the couch, clicking on the television to a news station, there had to be some new developments that she hadn't seen yet. She grabbed a lollipop from the table as she brought her knees into her chest much like L does, wrapping her arms around her legs and resting her chin on her arms. She was so focused on the tv, she hadn't noticed L quietly walk up to the side of the couch.

He stood there staring at her exposed skin with the papers grasped in his hand. He scanned her arms and her legs, this was the first time she had dressed so casually in front of him and he would've smiled at the sight, if it wasn't for what he saw circling her arms and legs. He placed the papers on the coffee table in front of her and slid onto the couch softly, although she didn't turn to face him. He watched her face for a minute and then went back to staring, what he saw infuriated him. They were perfect circles that wrapped around, 2 around each bicep, thigh and calf – she had obviously been tied down… not with rope though, he concluded, because there were no ridges – no indentations indicating the use of rope. The scar was smooth, like someone used metal clamps of some sort and either tightened them severely or heated them to high temperatures to make such a scar… 'or both' he thought.

He wrinkled his forehead and sighed as he softly touched the scar on her arm, he didn't notice her looking at him out of the corner of her eye - he was too focused on the color of the scar, it was fading, but it was still pink. "Second time… am I right?" He looked up at her to find her eying him, she just nodded. "How recent is this?" she could hear a mixture of hurt and anger in his voice. She couldn't help notice how different he acted when it was just the two of them. She watched as he moved his fingers to trace the scar on her thigh, she jumped at the touch –he never did this… it wasn't like L at all. "Late November" she spoke quietly. She watched as he clenched his jaw and formed a fist with his other hand. "That was right before you started on this case." She just nodded again, "You're stronger than I thought… any normal person would have given away their pain by the way they acted… you didn't show any sign of injury though… I watched you closely, you didn't give any indication you had been hurt so recently." She couldn't help but be a little insulted, stronger than he thought? Did her emotions make her seem weak to him? "Well I didn't think about it, yeah it hurt at first but there where bigger issues at hand." She said roughly, not happy that he had not thought of her as strong before. He nodded at this and stared at the scar on her thigh again, "What… what did they do to you?" he spoke very soft, as if he didn't want her to hear, "Are you sure you want to know?" she said, trying to decipher his change in tone. "… No… no I don't.. it'll only make me –" he stopped. "I would like to know why it happened though…" she breathed deeply, could she give him the basics without putting either of them in jeopardy?

"You should know I can't tell you that." He looked frustrated that he wasn't getting anything from her. "Why didn't you just give them the information? Isn't that what a normal person would do in order to survive?" She raised an eyebrow, not expecting him to suggest such a thing. "Are you suggesting that I should give out confidential information?" He looked away, knowing what he had just said went against everything he was about. "No… I only meant that, there couldn't possibly… be any information that could be more important than… your life." She breathed deep as she stared at his drawn expression. "Oh really? I can think of one thing… and my survival is secondary to what they were after, anyway." He whipped his head around to face her, confusion plastered on his face, "What…was so important… that you'd _die_ for?" She sighed heavily, why wouldn't he give it up? "L… you of all people should understand that our profession comes with risks, dying is a very big possibility." He clenched his jaw and then spoke, "But you're retired, or so you say. And its one thing to put your life on the line for a case and it's an entirely different thing to willingly give up your life." She scrunched her eyebrows together, not understanding why he was reacting this way. "I never said I _wanted_ to die, L" He searched her eyes, not understanding what could be worth more than this girls life… this girl, who he had admitted to caring for… what could possibly be more important than her being _alive_? He swallowed hard and slowly parted his lips, "I… don't understand" The thought of this girl dying made his heart hurt. He'd never felt that kind of hurt before, and he hated it. He looked to the ground, he wanted to rid the world of whatever it was that she'd die for to ensure her safety… only if he knew what it was.

"Are you alright, L?" He looked back up at her pleading eyes, god they were so blue… and, No, he wasn't alright – someone had hurt her, and she didn't care, she'd gladly go through the pain again to protect what she knew, she'd even die. He would have considered her indestructible determination and loyalty to be admirable, except that she wasn't just a fellow detective anymore… and he cared too much, he wanted to kick himself for allowing himself to fall prey to emotion. Being that determined, that loyal, could kill her… the thought made his stomach turn and his heart race, he had to do something to change her mind. What could change her mind? How could such loyalty be broken?

His thoughts stopped dead as another question came to him. 'Why is it that I care so much?... I've never spent this much effort on one person before…'

As he came to his answer, he began to breathe heavily and found his eyes wandering to her lips. They looked so sweet, he looked back into her eyes, not sure what he was doing, only coming to the conclusion that he wanted her to be his… He viewed her that way ever since he laid eyes on her but it didn't help that he was just coming to the realization that he wanted her to be his, romantically, just at this moment, with no idea how to make it into a reality.

"L?" her voice was barely audible over his shouting thoughts, he opened his mouth slightly to speak as he looked into her eyes, but nothing came out. He looked back at her lips… he wanted to kiss her. The desire frightened him, he never thought he'd feel something like this. He quickly jumped off the couch and walked over to the windows with a confused Mishca watching as he did so. 'Why did I let myself get emotionally attached? Isn't that a rule? No attachments… but..' he looked back at her briefly and then returned to the view, 'it's too late for that now… how am I supposed to stop caring?' Seconds later he felt a soft hand on his shoulder, "Is everything okay L?" He turned to face her "No…"

Finally he decided to do what he always saw others do when they cared about someone deeply. He bit his bottom lip and searched her eyes, unsure of himself. He leaned into her, watching as she scanned his eyes –he wrapped his arms around her waist, making her move towards him, he heard a surprised gasp come from her lips as he leaned in ever so gently and placed his lips on hers. He felt her pull away slightly but the sweet taste of grape candy on her lips made him pursue the kiss further, he pressed his lips a little harder onto hers and felt her give in. He felt as one hand reached behind his neck and the other found its place on his chest. The kiss was gentle, but captivating, the grape flavor of her lips was mixing with the sugar on his, it mesmerized him and felt as if he was transported to another world. He broke away slightly as they breathed raggedly, she tried to push away again but he captured her lips for a second time, their dancing tongues caused a fiery heat to form in the pit of his stomach, it was the same feeling he felt when he saw her the other day. He decided this was a good feeling and continued the kiss. He ran his fingers through her soft, wet hair as his heart beat faster. A few moments later he broke away slightly to let out a harsh breath. As their lips broke apart he felt her move away. The intensity he just experienced had washed away, the rest of the world was slowly coming back into focus as he gazed at her, longing for her lips again. He had no idea that it would have felt so, invigorating.

He came crashing back down to reality when she spoke, barely above a whisper. "you… you shouldn't do that.." His mouth dropped slowly as her eyes darted from side to side with a pained expression on her face. "Why –" His words broke her out of her trance and she started backing away from him, "No…no… don't… don't do that again…ever…. please" she asked pleadingly. She had enjoyed the kiss, but this was too much – she couldn't let these feelings grow anymore, she had to stomp them back down – how was she supposed to protect what she knew, how was she supposed to protect _him_ if she got that close? He could never know, no one, could ever know… she had to stop this, she had to get out.

Surprise came over his face as he watched her rush to the hotel room door. His breath was coming out uncontrollably, she couldn't leave. He dashed for her and grabbed her by the wrist, "Stay" he pleaded. She shook her head, "I can't do this L… it's too dangerous, please, just stay away from me, I'm no good for you" His mind raced, why did she let him kiss her if she didn't feel the same way? "Let me decide what's good for me, Mishca." She tore away her wrist from his grasp, leaving a shocked expression on his face.

"The further away I am from you the better off you are, believe me"

"I don't understand"

"You don't have to, this isn't going to happen" she said bluntly. At that she rushed out the door, not entirely sure where she was going. L was left there alone, staring at the door she had just slammed in his face. "What… just happened?" He asked the empty room, kicking himself for kissing her in the first place –


	20. Chapter 19: Failure

Chapter 19: Failure

It had been days since he'd seen Mishca, she hadn't come around since he kissed her. She had him so confused, nothing she said made any sense to him. What did she mean, and why did she kiss him back? She was so much more difficult than most cases. He needed to know the answer to his questions, and that's why he was pacing the fourth floor of the hotel. Every time he traced her whereabouts, the transmitter in her watch always showed her being in Tatum's room. This fact made him sick to his stomach; it only enforced his original thought of the two being an item. He walked past the door several times before deciding to knock.

He breathed heavily as he waited for the door to open, waiting to see her.

"Ryuzaki, What are you doing here?" Tatum answered the door,

"I need to speak with Mishca, quick, let me in"

"Uh.. yea sure, but… Mishca's not here" He said as he let L in the room

He scanned the room "What do you mean she's not here? The transmitter shows that she's here!"

"But… she's not, Ryuzaki. I wouldn't lie about that"

L looked at him furious and went back to searching the room. He walked over to the side table near the recliner and spotted her watch. He picked it up with only his pointer finger and his thumb, looking at it wide eyed before he clenched it tightly in his fist. "Where did she go" he said softly as his hand squeezed the watch.

"I don't know"

L turned around and glared at him with clenched teeth, "What do you mean, you don't know?"

Tatum gulped and scratched his head nervously, "I.. I don't know where she went, she.. she didn't tell me"

L's breath quickened as he began to thoroughly look through the room, he even looked in the closet and under the bed – he was going to lose it. He stomped up to Tatum and stared up into his eyes, intimidating him "When was the last time she was here?"

"Uhh… a…a.. …few… days ago.."

He was definitely going to lose it now, it took everything he had to swallow what he had just said "… days?" His chest was heaving back and forth with his quick breaths, his mind not being able to process why she would leave and not tell anyone where she was going.

"Uh yea… she was here a few days ago, she was real upset. She spent the night and she was gone when I woke up in the morning…. No note, no nothing… just that watch."

He clenched his jaw and stormed passed Tatum out into the hall. He had to find her, why would she do this? Where could she be? Had he really upset her that much or was she hiding something? He found himself not caring about the latter; he just needed to know she was okay. He hurried back to his room and tried calling her cellphone - voicemail, she had it turned off. "Mishca it's… me. Please, return my call as soon as you get this." He shut the phone as he sat in a chair in front of his computer. He placed the phone down and began typing madly, seconds later he had tapped into as many live security video feeds that he could at once. As he watched, he raised a shaking hand to his forehead as he realized he wouldn't be able to find her, not like this. He rubbed his temples and then pressed his fingers into his eyes, he couldn't think, why couldn't he think? He needed to find her, how the hell was he supposed to do that? He had no idea where she would've gone, he didn't even know of her real name, not even a credit card to track purchases, he had nothing. What the hell was he supposed to do?

Flash to an airplane

"Thank you for coming"

She turned to smile at him, "Of course Watari" she whispered.

"Ryuzaki wouldn't come… he wants nothing to do with this."

"I see… I still don't understand why you asked me though?"

He sighed, "I know I'm not aware of the full details, and I don't wish to be privy to that information. But what I do know, is that he knew you in some capacity... and let you get close enough… you… you are proof that there was some good in B… I need to be able to believe he had good in him"

She sighed, not wanting to think about it

They were quiet for a while, until Watari spoke up.

"Ryuzaki… cares for you deeply, you are aware of that aren't you?"

"…Yes"

"I don't want to sound presumptuous, but you care for him the same, don't you?"

She rubbed her hand on her jeans uncomfortably, "…yes"

"Then, why, may I ask, did you reject him and why are you hiding from him?"

She breathed heavily.

"You told me once that you were sure I would never harm him, do you remember?"

He nodded.

"Then please trust me when I say I did it for him. I can't tell you the details, but it's better if him and I remain plutonic and I leave as soon as this case is solved. Everything that I've done has been for his safety. Please trust me, I don't ever want anything to happen to him."

"He won't want you to go."

"It's the way it has to be Watari, the further away I am the safer he will be – I may not even return"

"Safer? Are you in some sort of trouble Mishca?"

She smiled slightly, "Always…. But as you said, any distraction could be fatal. I don't want to be that distraction"

Flash back to L

He had been trying to call Watari for hours to no avail, he concluded that he must've still been on the plane. 'KIRA has the worst timing' he thought, thinking back to a conversation Watari and him had a day ago. BB had died, of a heart attack in his cell, and Watari was going to the funeral. Watari had wanted L to go with him, but there was no way he would ever do such a thing. He didn't care about BB, what he cared about was Mishca, the fact that she was missing, the fact that he needed Watari's help and BB had taken him away from him. He didn't know what to do, this was the first time he was completely lost.

A day later

L hacked into a satellite with the help of the US government; he had told them it was in regards to the safety of the nation. It was total bull, but they fell for it. Watari was still not answering his phone, the last thing he needed was both of the only people he cared about to be missing. He had to see if Watari was at the funeral, like he said he would be, and this was the only way to do it. There were no security camera's at the graveyard, he had to use another means to ensure his safety. He entered in the coordinates and the feed switched to a graveyard, he saw the back of an old man in a suit and a hat next to a young lady who was wearing a black halter, backless dress, the cloth didn't start until her hips. The shape of the women's body reminded him of someone. 'BB actually had someone else show up besides Watari?' Curious, he stared at the woman's back - The skin on her back was uneven, L zoomed in to get a closer look. As he got closer the picture got clearer, what he saw shocked him. He took a sip of his tea as he examined the ladies back. On it there was angel wings that filled up her entire shoulder blades and went down to her hips. … it looked like a tattoo, only it wasn't… the color was all wrong, it looked more like a scar. He shook his head, he didn't understand people who got scar tattoos, why would you put yourself through so much pain for a design? 'Not even a good one at that, it's so messy' he thought 'but then again… someone that crazy would fit for BB', he stared at the wings thinking back to BBs letter, he had mentioned something about angels, hadn't he?

He brushed the thought aside as he maneuvered the feed so he could see the front of their faces. He went to put his tea cup down and watched as his screen switched to the frontal view. Watari was definitely there standing beside…. "Mishca?" he said shocked as the tea cup fell to the floor and shattered. "What are you doing there?" He was relieved that she was okay but confused as to why she would go to BB's funeral and shocked at what was on her back, he couldn't put the pieces together, what did it all mean?

Flash to the graveyard

Mishca stood there beside Watari, they were both silent and unmoving. Was he really dead? She had thought she would have cried…. She thought she would have felt something… but all's she felt was numb. She even wore a backless dress in memory of him – he had called her an angel of justice once, she hated it and he engraved wings in her back so she'd never forget. Wearing that dress was a sort of justice for her, it shouted I'm still here, regardless of what you've done, but now, being at the gravesite, she just couldn't care less.

She stared as the casket was lowered into the ground - The predicament she had found herself in with L was heartbreaking, but she didn't even curse BBs name for it – she would have thought she'd blame him for everything, yell at him for everything he put her through, hell she half expected herself to kick the casket when she got there… but she didn't do any of those things. She just stood there, numb, as she watched a tear roll down Watari's face.

Hours later

L finally reached Watari on his phone.

"You shouldn't be calling Ryuzaki"

"Put her on the phone" he said ignoring his statement

"Put who on the phone?"

"Please just put her on the phone."

There was a pause

"She does not wish to speak with you at the moment"

He shut his eyes as he pinched the top of his nose in between his thumb and pointer finger

"Then tell me what she is doing there, this doesn't make any sense"

"She's here at my request."

"Why would you take her to a funeral… THAT funeral?"

"I didn't want to go alone Ryuzaki, and…"

"and what?"

"You care for her don't you?"

"….. I don't see what that has to do with anything."

"Well, she won't speak with you let alone see you right now, you want her to be safe, am I correct?"

"…Yes"

"Well, she is safe with me Ryuzaki"

"I know that but…" He sighed heavily into the phone "Nevermind, when are you both returning?"

"My flight leaves tomorrow"

"_Your_ flight? Are you saying she's not coming back?"

"…She hasn't decided"

L breathed heavily as he tried to speak, his bottom lip quivered slightly. Had he really failed in his first romantic attempt? He couldn't believe he felt this way, let alone scaring her away. Was what he did considered that out of line? No, it couldn't possibly be – why wouldn't she come back? What's she hiding? He didn't care, the only thing he cared about at that moment was getting her back to Japan.

"Watari?" he whispered.

"Yes, What is it?"

He spoke even softer, hurt and pleading seeping through his voice "bring her back… please… bring her back to me…"

"Ryuzaki? I've never heard you like this before –"

"Please, just do it" He hung up and threw the phone across the room. How did he get like this? This wasn't him…

A day later - Back to LA in a restaurant

"It has to be nice to finally get to eat some real food, huh?"

Watari chuckled "Yes, this is quite nice… "

She smiled, glad to see him laugh. He had been so depressed – she wasn't used to it.

"I wanted to thank you, for coming with me… this, was extremely difficult for me to go through. I don't know how I would have gotten through it alone."

She smiled slightly and nodded. 'God BB had his way of destroying everything he touched, didn't he?'

"Can I ask… how long you knew him for?"

She took her time finishing the bite of food in her mouth, she should have expected this, he'll want to know more now that he's gone…

"I don't really know… quite a few months, we worked on a few cases together."

"Is that so?"

"Yes… looking back on it though… he only used me to get a name for himself, so he could have some sort of reputation to become a private detective for his victim's families…"

He winced at this, oops… maybe she shouldn't bring that up.

"I remember when he was just a little boy, playing in the yard… I never thought he'd be able to kill the innocent…" he said softly as he stared at his food.

"I never thought he could do a lot of the things that he did…" she said, her tone matching his.

"He hurt you… didn't he?"

She placed her fork back on the plate, staring at him concerned. She opened her mouth to speak but he did first

"Forgive me, Mishca"

Her eyes went soft, his pain was visible and it hurt her to see it

"For what?"

"It's my fault he hurt you, it's my fault that those innocents were killed… I failed him."

"No –"

"I failed."

She didn't know what to say, she reached her hand and folded it over his on the table. She felt him squeeze lightly and smiled at her before he released and went back to his dinner.

They were nearly done when he spoke up again,

"Are you coming back to Japan, Mishca?"

"I don't know if I should." She toyed with what was left of her food, hoping he wouldn't ask, how was she to say no to him right now?

"Please return to Japan, Mishca… I would greatly appreciate it if you did so – L needs you."

SORRY! I really tried so hard to make it so BB would live for those of you that asked, but the story just wouldn't progress the way I wanted it to. : ( Please don't hate me for killing him…

And he doesn't need to be alive to win… that was one of the points I think he was trying to make when he dosed himself in gasoline in the first place in Another Note…


	21. Chapter 20: Of Monsters and Scars

Chapter 20: Of Monsters and Scars

L sat in a corner stuffing sugar cubes in his mouth as his eyes stayed fixated on one part in the carpet. It's not that there was anything particularly interesting about the spot, he just didn't know what else to do. The team couldn't do much else but track recent deaths and try to find other leads - none of which ever went anywhere. He found himself sending them home frequently out of a lack of work. The investigation had gone a little stale since surveillance ceased – and L couldn't wait to get to To-Ho to confront Light head on – he was sure that Light was KIRA and that the team would find themselves quite busy once they met.

Even though he wanted to solve this case, it wasn't what was on his mind. The most recent events had his thoughts so twisted and convoluted that even he was having a hard time putting the pieces together.

Suddenly he heard a click from the other side of the door, his head popped up just in time to see Watari entering as he removed his hat, he held his breath until he saw Mishca following closely behind. He let a small sigh of relief escape his lips as he watched. He stood up in anticipation but Mishca walked right passed him to her room and shut the door. He stared at the closed door with sad eyes. "Give her time, Ryuzaki." Watari spoke quietly as he moved near him. L slowly looked at Watari. "Time? No, I need answers" he spat and he stormed into her room.

As he entered Mishca was just taking off a sweatshirt that revealed a spaghetti strap top underneath. Her back was towards him and he could see the top part of the angel wing scars.

"What were you thinking, just leaving like that?" The anger in his voice was easy to spot.

"What were you thinking, letting Watari go to something like that by himself?"

"Don't speak of things you know nothing about" he snapped.

She turned to face him, eyes boring into his.

"Assuming I know nothing is a rather large risk, don't you think?"

"Then enlighten me"

"You are not the only orphan he has ever cared about, _he_ was close to his heart as well. You should have supported him."

He swallowed, "I don't see how anyone could care for that _thing_"

"Thing? Was he not human?" She nagged him, although her efforts to irritate him didn't work.

"… He was a… monster"

She stared towards the floor, she couldn't help but agree, not that she could tell L that though.

"Monster?" she asked as her gaze went back to him, "What made him a monster?"

"He abused his gift… used it selfishly… he felt righteous in his acts, even though they hurt people. That's someone I'd never want to turn into."

"A monster, or B?"

"They're one in the same."

He bit his thumb,

"I understand" she said, thinking that this was part of the reason Watari told her L would be displeased if he found out that she actually knew B – she couldn't help but wonder how he would react if he actually did find out.

"You couldn't possibly understand my reasoning for not going. It's not so simple."

"No… I've learned it never is with you." She said as she sat on the bed.

"We're digressing; you were gone before the funeral as well, where did you go?" He said as he reached in his pocket and brought out her watch, flinging it to the bed. She looked at the watch and then back to him, "If I didn't wear that, I obviously didn't want to be found. Why do my whereabouts concern you?"

"You could have been hurt, or killed by KIRA, and I would've never known until you showed on our list of victims"

"I obviously must not be speaking clearly, why does any of this concern you? Where I am, whether or not I'm still alive, none of this is pertinent to the investigation." She went cold in an attempt to stop him from going any further, but it didn't work.

"I'm not asking these questions because they effect the investigation."

"Then what do they affect?"

He looked away, "Me."

She was quiet for a moment,

"It was wrong of me to come back – I should go."

He whipped his head around to face her, "I'd prefer if you stayed"

"That's why I shouldn't be here. You shouldn't have a preference, no one is supposed to be distracting you from this case –"

He cut her off, "Has it ever come to your attention that I may welcome that distraction?"

"Welcoming distraction is welcoming death, and I won't allow it. I'm no good for you, just stay away"

"Stop saying that."

"Then start listening."

They glared at each other.

"Why may I ask, are you so concerned for my safety then?"

"Without you this case would be lost and KIRA would win."

"Is that all?" She watched as his face changed expressions.

"Yes." She had to lie to push him away, it was the only way.

"I see…" he bit his thumb and looked to the ground, not happy with her answer. "You'll be a distraction no matter where you are, at least stay and help with the case."

She sighed. "Ok."

He turned to leave and walked towards the door, before he opened it he asked one more question, "First right?"

"What?"

"Your back. I'm assuming you still won't tell me how or why it happened?"

"I told you, don't concern yourself with my scars."

At that he nodded his head and closed the door behind him.

On the other side of the door he found Watari sitting at the computer, he turned in the chair when he heard L shuffling towards him. "Did you manage to get the answers you were looking for?"

L shoved his hands in his pockets and looked past Watari and out the window. "I got answers – none of which were satisfactory."

Watari nodded his head,

"Mishca said I should have supported you – forgive me if I came across crass, you know my feelings towards him – it appears I may have let that cloud my decision"

Watari smiled, shook his head and let out a small chuckle.

"What do you find so amusing?"

"She really has a way with you, doesn't she?"

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing… she is just good for you, you have grown since her arrival."

He let out a harsh breath, "Good for me? She says otherwise."

"Is that so?"

He slumped over to the chair and plopped in it, maneuvering himself into his usual sitting position. "Mmm. Yes, I'm not quite sure what to do about it…"

"The answer will come to you in time"

"… what do you know of the scar on her back?"

"Nothing I'm afraid, I did not dare to ask."

He bit down on his finger, "it's not a perfect representation of wings, but still, the outline is quite intricate… a lot of effort has to be put into something like that… and how deep did they have cut to make such a scar?"

"Quite deep, I'm sure."

He bit down harder on his finger, "The scar wasn't wanted, I'm certain of that… it's evident from the shaky lines of the wings, she didn't stay still for it… meaning she wasn't numbed or medicated… and probably struggled…"

"I can't imagine how excruciating that had to be. Who would put her through something like that?"

L's gaze fell to Mishca's door, "A monster"


	22. Chapter 21: Disclosing Information

Chapter 21: Disclosing Information

A few days later

Mishca was sitting curled up on the couch as L approached her. She had been quiet for the past few days and did everything in her power to steer clear of him. He hadn't had a chance to be alone with her since their conversation a few days before – he only saw her when the team was there reviewing the case. Other than that, she was either locked up in her room or out with Tatum and Matsuda. The three of them went out every night since she got back, taking her to movies, dinners, art galleries, clubs, anything she wanted. It upset him that he couldn't do those things with her, even more upset that he was positive he was the reason she was gone every night.

The team had just left after a very uneventful meeting. He was impatiently waiting for his chance to be alone with her again, he was itching to speak to her. He couldn't stand the silence between them anymore.

He bit his thumb as he sat down next to her, eyeing her cautiously. "We'll be moving to a new building shortly – I had one constructed so we won't have to move from hotel to hotel anymore." She nodded, but stayed where she was.

Hoping he'd get a response he tried something else. "…We got our results back from the entrance exam"

She shot up, looking excited. "Let me see" she said softly. Leaning in closer to see her percentage on the sheet of paper he held.

He pulled away, not letting her see the paper.

"Come on L, let me see"

He smirked, "Not until you answer a question."

"That's not fair."

"Why did you retire?"

She looked at him blankly.

"I made a mistake"

"One mistake made you retire?"

"It was a rather large mistake."

"What happened?"

She smiled, "I can't tell you."

"Mmm. You are very good though. If you didn't go out so much and concentrated more you could be great –"

"That may be so, but I can't stay cooped up like you L – I'll go insane. As much as I love solving cases, I need to have a life outside of all of this"

"Then what? You just retire? That doesn't make any sense, you can still take cases …"

"I told you, I made a mistake. I shouldn't be taking cases…"

He looked away, "Well… what if, you had, a partner, to make sure you didn't make another one?"

"A partner? That's how the mistake happened in the first place."

L turned to face her, he wrinkled his forehead confused. She had a partner before?

"Can I see my score now?"

He handed her the paper and watched as she smiled. "You did very well" he smiled at her, "But I still got first place."

She shook her head, "I would have had it, if you hadn't of made me answer some wrong."

The two laughed, he was glad to see her smile.

"Light Yagami got first place as well." She noticed,

"mm, yes. I expected as much." He reached out and brushed a strand of hair out of her face and felt her recoil, she shot him a disapproving look. "Stop" she said harshly.

"You don't want to be a distraction… you think being harsh will accomplish that?"

She just stared at him

"You'll be a distraction for me regardless of how you act or where you are, you cannot control that – the damage has already been done."

"You don't know the half of it" she whispered as she looked away, "I refuse to be the reason you –"

"You won't be" he said roughly as he leaned in closer, "trust me" he whispered as he pulled her lips to his. They kissed for a moment but he pulled away when he felt a tear sliding down onto his face.

"Please stop doing that." She whispered. "I don't want to hurt you"

He stared at her sad expression, "I don't think you ever could"

"But I can… and I will. Like you said… the damage has already been done" She stood up and began walking away, "You shouldn't have gotten so close to me – this won't end well."

He couldn't believe this was happening again, . "Wait -"

She stopped in her tracks, "Why won't you listen? You need to stay away…"

As she left Watari came in the room, "Is everything alright Ryuzaki?"

He sat there staring at the door, "I've never asked for anything for myself"

"Besides your sweets" he giggled, trying to cheer him up.

"I just want this one thing, Watari. Am I not allowed to have anything for myself?"

"I'm sorry?"

He shook his head, "I never thought I could feel this, let alone even say the words…"

"What is it, Ryuzaki?"

"I think.. no.. I'm certain.. I'm in love with her Watari" He turned to face the man who raised him, his face full of helplessness. He didn't know what to do, he felt powerless.

Watari smiled, "I know"

"What do you mean, you know?"

"It's easy to see Ryuzaki. Even some of the team members have commented that you favor her – there's no surprise as to the reason behind it."

"I see."

"Have you told her?"

"Tell her? Watari, she wants nothing to do with me."

A few hours later

Watari brought out three dishes of cheesecake to the main area and set them down on the table. L quickly snatched up one and began picking at it with his fork. Watari picked one up and sat down. L stared at the extra slice on the table.

"Where is Mishca?" Watari asked.

"Not here."

"Oh, well that's too bad. I'll have to save the slice for her when she gets back."

"Last time I checked she was at the club downtown."

"They've been going there a lot"

"Yes. It makes me nervous – I hope she is being safe"

"Have you decided whether or not you will tell her?"

L swallowed his cake as he stared at him. "No. It's not a good idea – she'd leave for sure"

Watari nodded his head.

"While we're on the topic of telling Mishca things, what else did you tell her about me and B?"

Watari looked at him confused, "I didn't say anything to her about the two of you, why?"

L's eyes grew wide and he stopped mid-chew, his fork hitting the plate with a loud clang.

"You told her nothing?" His mind raced, how did she know it was B… how did she even know they were orphans if Watari didn't tell her?

"I.. may have said.. something.." Watari tried covering for her slip up.

L swallowed his bite of cake and set the plate down. He would have to keep a closer eye on her.. this didn't add up. Something wasn't right here.


	23. Chapter 22: Revelation

Chapter 22: Revelation

/Nights later/

The club was booming with music, so loud that it was hard to hear one another. Mishca danced with strangers as Tatum and Matsuda sat at the bar. Sweat could be seen gleaming off her skin, even thru the camera lens it was visible. He watched as she moved gracefully to the music, completely letting herself go. The light bounced off her face and the rest of her skin. She looked absolutely stunning to him, and it angered him how close she was getting to complete strangers. They held on to her as a lover would and swayed back and forth with her. He gritted his teeth... he had hopes of being that close to her, but never actually tried... she wouldn't let him, anyway. Anytime he tried to advance, she'd push him away, telling him it's what was best for him... she wasn't good for him, she had said. It infuriated him, let me be the judge of that, he remembered saying. But it was no use, she wanted nothing to do with him romantically - and it pained him. It had taken him so long to come to the realization that he was in love with the girl... and now that he knew, he couldn't ignore the feelings, no matter how hard he tried and no matter how suspicious she was.

He kept watching as his love interest flirted and danced with anyone that passed by. "I told her to be careful... she's being so careless! I swear she's doing it to vex me!" She said that she needed a break from the case... that's why she needed to get out and do this... but L... only took it as her needing to get away from him. Was he that grotesque? Was he really that untouchable? He sighed... eyeing Tatum. The way she was dancing with other men completely crossed out the possibility of those two being a couple... even with the proof in front of him, he couldn't help but feel jealous at how close the two were. L got up and walked away to find some comfort food, he'd need a really large cake if he was going to watch anymore of this.

Moments later Mishca ran up to Tatum and Matsuda, trying to get them on the dance floor. They both looked intoxicated, "No way!" Tatum said laughing,

L had finally gotten back to the room and placed the cake on the table, he was cutting himself a rather large piece when he heard...

Matsuda replied loudly to shout over the music "You'd have better luck getting L to dance out there than me!" He meant it as a harmless joke but her face grew worried, she knew he didn't even realize what he had shouted, as soon as the music paused to switch to another song. Everyone heard what he had said, clearly. She felt eyes on her and quickly scanned the room, hoping there weren't any KIRA fanatics there that'd what they're heads.

She turned around, eying a suspicious group of men who were staring right back at her "Tatum" she whispered, the worry dripping in her voice "Get him out of here... now!" "Not without you" he said. "JUST GO! Quickly, you drew the wrong attention Matsuda. Get him out of here!"She whispered loud enough for them to hear and without a second's hesitation they began walking quickly to the door. Suddenly, a gunshot could be heard and they stopped dead in their tracks. Everyone began screaming and ran as quickly as they could to the exits, the three of them got lost in the crowd and struggled to get to the exit as well. Mishca looked back at who shot the gun; the man was waving at another, seeming to give him directions. Seconds later someone grabbed her from behind, she screamed... everyone had just gotten out of the club except for Mishca and Tatum who was trying to push a drunken Matsuda out the door. Mishca watched the two hoping they'd escape in time as the man holding on to her dragged her to the center of the floor.

"Oh no you don't!"

Another shot was heard and Mishca saw Matsuda finally get out the door as Tatum fell to the ground.

"NNNNNNNOOO!" Mishca cried, "Tatum! TATUM!"

Tears were falling down her face now as she watched him lay there in his own blood. "No no no no..."

"OH YES!" A harsh voice came from behind.

Someone took her by the hair and dragged her some more "So... little missy... I couldn't help but overhear your conversation there… you want to tell me where your little L friend is?"

L stood watching the screen in horror, this is exactly why he had told her to be careful. He was reaching for the phone when he saw something shining in the cameras view. A man stepped over her and joked with his friends,

"Hey Lee, what do you think KIRA would think, if we killed L for him?"

They laughed and stared as the man who spoke knelt down and tore her shirt open with a sharp knife, exposing the skin underneath. She cried harder, knowing the proof was there for everyone to see. L's eyes widened as he dropped the phone

"What... what is the meaning of this?"

He couldn't explain what he saw, her left ribcage was scared in a large calligraphic B and her right ribcage shown a large L...

His mouth dropped open, "Who the hell are you Mishca?"

She didn't say a word, just tried to kick the men away. It was no use, all's she did was manage to shake her heels right off her feet, exposing a lightly engraved B on the bottom of her left foot and an L on her other.

L watched in disbelief, this was why she didn't want him concerned with her scars – of course she didn't want him to see that! He was right to be suspicious of her from the beginning, and scolded himself for falling for her.

"Well look what we have here? How interesting... that's some pretty cool scarring you got there little missy. Want to tell us how you got them? Better yet, to save time, how about you just tell us about the cool looking L you got there on your ribcage?"

The man with the knife knelt down closer to her and rubbed her right ribcage. She tried to get away by moving fast but the man that held her felt her sqwerming and held on to her left arm tighter, she didn't realize this until she heard a loud cracking noise and a pain shot up her arm. She screamed in agony, realizing she had just broken her own arm with that tactic.

"OH? You think THAT is pain lovely? Tsk tsk tsk, that's not pain. What is pain is what you will experience if you don't start talking"

She just looked at him with tears in her eyes, no words escaped her mouth.

"Boys!" He demanded and in seconds other men were around her tying her wrists and ankles with barbed wire, making sure to tighten them until bits of blood poured out. She screamed as she felt the hard metal pierce her skin. She still refused to say anything, only thinking of how to stay quiet and where the hell did they get barbed wire from?

Watari was standing next to L now asking him why he wasn't sending help "No... I need to know... what is the meaning of this? What does she know? Why is my and Bs initials carved into her side Watari! What does she know?"

He glared at him furious and worried at the same time.

"I need to hear what she says!"

"But Ryuzaki!"

"One more time love, where is L located?"

She cried as she bit her tongue. There was no way she was giving them anything.

"Still nothing? Very well then, boys,... let's see if we can make these scars any prettier." Right on cue, she was hit in her rib cages with immense force repeatedly. She could feel some of her ribs cracking under the pressure and screamed out of pain.

"Does that hurt love? How about you call for L? I'm sure he'd come running..."

L watched as his heart was hurting but wouldn't allow himself to interfere just yet...

"Say something Mishca... say something!" He found himself wanting her to give him up, just don't hurt her anymore he thought, but then he found himself torn between his feelings for her and what he saw on her skin.

"I don't know you, do I?" he whispered hurt.

"L! You must do something!" Watari scolded him, he just stood there. Finally Watari grabbed him and dragged him away from the screen down to the car port.

"You can watch on the screen in the back seat, but I will not sit by while this girl is tortured to death!" L was shocked as Watari threw him in the back seat of his car, but he quickly recovered and set up the computer in the back seat. He broke into the clubs security again so he could see what was happening.

Mishca coughed uncontrollably, she could feel her breathing becoming shorter. Blood came from her mouth as she tried to breathe deeply, she could only assume one of the broken ribs had broken through a lung.

"You're a tough little bitch aren't you? Either you give us something or you will die here tonight like your boyfriend over there!"

She still didn't say a word, even when she heard the whirring sound of an electric drill. She breathed harshly and tried to move, but each time the barbed wire cut in deeper to her flesh. By now her arms and legs were drenched in her warm blood, she could feel someone forcing a finger nail off her hand with pliers, and she screamed again but still focused on the frightening sound of the drill. Hyperventilating she thought of L... there was no way she was going to give anything up, she just couldn't do it – he was too important.

"Why won't you say anything bitch? You can't hide that you know him, the proof is engraved in your skin!"

She breathed, "I'm expendable, do what you will with me, you'll never touch him"

L watched, not knowing what to think. She wasn't going to say anything, she was prepared to die for him, he didn't understand. He watched in horror as the man with the drill came closer to her,

"One last chance"

She just shook her head as more tears streamed down her face. The other men held her down as the other drilled into her hip bone on both sides, she screamed the loudest she could muster, but passed out when the drill hit bone for the second time.

"We're here Ryuzaki, the police appear to be breaking in now. Stay here until i say it's safe for you."

L was hyperventilating in the back seat, "please be alive" he spoke softly, he watched as the police took each culprit in handcuffs , Watari and Matsuda spoke with the lead policeman and somehow got them to leave the scene. Once the last cop car drove away, L burst from the car and ran into the building.

His heart was beating faster than he had ever felt before, he spotted her and ran to her. Kneeling down beside her he put a hand on her head as the other traced the scarred L on her side. He was torn as to what he should do, but decided on picking her up to get her to the car, she stirred once he had her in his arms

"... L?"

"It's me, don't try to talk right now, you're not in good shape"

"L? No! Why are you here, you shouldn't be here!" She felt like she was screaming but it came out as a whisper. He looked at her wide-eyed, even now she was trying to protect him.

"Why are you here? It's not safe, not safe" she said hoarsely as they passed Tatum's body.

"Tatum?" she whispered.

"I'm afraid he's gone Mishca" She cried into his shirt, blood soaked into the white fabric as she did so.

"You.. Loved him, didn't you?"

He got to the car and held her as he sat down.

She sobbed, "Yes!" Even though he had no idea what he had just witnessed, he couldn't ignore his feelings. This knowledge still hurt him.

"He was like a brother to me L and now he's gone!"

Watari quickly closed the door behind him and sped off.

L sighed, partially relieved that she only thought of him as a sibling, but still furious at not knowing what was happening – he shouldn't have missed something so big. How the hell did she know B? Who was this girl?

"We can't take her to a normal hospital, they will ask questions. Call a doctor, have them come out to the new building."

"It's barely finished"

He looked at her as her eyes started closing again as he cradled her.

"I don't care – I won't take her anywhere else. She needs immediate medical attention – make sure you get the best doctor – she needs to recover… quickly - I have questions that need to be answered."

Watari looked at him in the rear view mirror, "Let's just focus on keeping her breathing at this point Ryuzaki, your interrogation can wait."

He glared back at him in the mirror, he was starting to feel Watari wasn't on his side on this one.

Okay… so I've been dying to write this chapter… stay tuned for how L reacts when she wakes… *evil laugh* ;-)

… I think I'm enjoying my own story way to much… ahh, oh well. =D


	24. Chapter 23: Confinement

Chapter 23: Confinement

L followed Watari into the new building, cradling a limp unconscious body close to his chest. They walked quickly but carefully to a room on basement level 3. Once inside he gently laid her down on an examination table as Watari searched for something to cut the wire that circled her wrists and ankles. L stood over her, surveying her body – he couldn't help but focus on the large calligraphic L on her side, he moved his fingers lightly over the outline of the scar. It was perfect – the exact L he had used to represent himself was carved into this girls body – there was no mistaking it, it wasn't just coincidence.

He reluctantly backed away so that Watari could quickly snip the wires, freeing her wrists and ankles from each other. He didn't take them completely off, fearing the amount of blood it would cause to emerge – he decided that would have to wait for the doctor. The loud snipping of metal wire caused Mishca to stir, she opened her eye lids slowly, every inch of her felt as if it was on fire. Her eyes met L's, they were full of worry and anger.

"Do you have any idea what you've done?" he spoke delicately.

She struggled to keep her eyes open, she wanted to reach a hand out to him but it was too painful, "I told you" she whispered, "to stay away… you, don't… listen."

He held his hands at his side and clenched them into fists as he watched her eyes close. He slowly walked backwards, moving his finger to his mouth – he stopped when his eyes saw the deep red on his hand and sleeve – looking down he noticed his shirt was more red than white. He swallowed hard and clenched his jaw – his breath quickened as he stared down at his bloodied hands, he had no idea what this girl knew, but she just couldn't die.

L sat hunched in a chair next to the girl's unmoving body. His fingers were red and swollen from biting down so hard on them. He was furious at this girl for hiding something so important, furious that he hadn't installed cameras in the hotel rooms – if he had, he would have known already and he wouldn't have let this go so far. But it was too late, he had feelings for this girl and was worried she would not wake. His conflicting feelings made it difficult for him to sit there. He stared at her slow heart rate on the monitor, wondering what she knew and if she'd even survive this. His gaze fell back to her face, he was struggling to keep his composure "Wake up… I need you to wake up."

Days later, she stirred. Her eyes opened slowly and he dashed forward to grab her hand. He didn't speak, just watched and sighed heavily knowing she was alright.

"L?" she asked

"I'm here..."

She tried to sit up but winced in pain, "you know you shouldn't move, your hip bones were drilled into and you have three broken ribs – just lie still."

She stared into his eyes amazed that she had survived the onslaught but stubbornly continued to sit up. A small growl escaped his lips as she disobeyed him – she was just going to hurt herself more by moving around.

"How bad?" She spoke softly

He caressed her hand with his thumb as he held on to it. "You lost a lot of blood… the doctor had to give you a transfusion…. 3 broken ribs, a fractured arm, stiches for your wrists and ankles… you were in surgery for a very long time… they had to repair a lung and examine your hipbones"

"and?"

He let out a loud sigh, "I suppose… it could have been worse. You'll still be able to walk, but it will be extremely painful for a while. You'll most likely have to endure physical therapy – if they had went any deeper - "

"Not so bad then" she let a small smile grace her lips, trying to look at the brighter side of things, she was alive.

"Not so bad? You almost DIED Mishca! Do you have any idea –"

"But I didn't" she cut him off, "I'm alive aren't I? I'm fine… really. I'll be fine."

He sat back in his chair as he removed his hand from hers, bringing it up to his head in frustration. "Fine? How is this fine? Do you realize how close you were to death?"

She stared at him,

"I told you to be careful – I should have never let you go out"

They were both silent for what seemed liked hours, the silence was unnerving. His heart was telling him to wrap his arms around her but his mind was telling him to throw her into an interrogation room to pull information out of her… and his mind was winning.

"You need to explain yourself Mishca, I don't understand any of this… those scars… you have to explain."

She looked away, "I'm afraid I can't tell you anything."

He bit his finger, "Tell me. I'm not asking"

She tried to breathe, but was having trouble. "No - I won't."

He gritted his teeth, "Damn it Mishca! You have to tell me something!"

She shook her head no, there was still a chance she could hide what she knew, she couldn't start talking now, not after everything. It didn't matter that it was him asking – he didn't need to know, it was best if he didn't know any of it.

"Please Mishca… just say something… don't make me have to –" he pleaded but she cut him off,

"It's okay –" She spoke reassuringly, "do what you think you have to."

He was speechless, was she giving him permission? His stomach turned.

She obviously knew or did something and had been hiding it from the very beginning. He was right to be suspicious of her, but he let his feelings cloud his judgment. He was furious with himself, how did he let this one slip through the cracks?

Just then Watari entered the room, "You should go Ryuzaki, I need to give Mishca her medication. Let her rest." It was more of an order than a suggestion and he reluctantly left the room.

"You really scared us you know" Watari spoke calmly as he walked over to her.

She smirked faintly, "It wasn't my idea."

He stood next her and gave her a new morphine drip. "Did he do that to you? Carve those letters into you, I mean." He asked,

She simply nodded, knowing which "he" he was referring to.

"The angel wings as well?"

She nodded again.

He let out a disappointed sigh.

"You should rest now." He said firmly and began retreating to the door.

When she woke she had no idea what time it was - she found herself barricaded in a cell, there was a cot and a barely private bathroom all monitored with video cameras. She tried to breathe in deeply but winced at the pressure it caused in her chest. Her entire body felt like an open flesh wound. She pressed the button on her morphine drip, maneuvering her hands around it was difficult, the fresh cuts still stung, she managed to get the morphine into her system before she felt any severe pain.

L sat on the other side of the room, watching her through the one way mirror. Trying desperately to separate his personal feelings from what he had to do.

"Ryuzaki, is this really necessary?"

"Yes, it is Watari. She's hiding something that I need to know.. "

He held on tightly to his legs with both hands, his nails digging into the denim of his jeans.

A few days later

He figured he'd give her a few days to let the confinement sink in without any communication from anyone. Watari came in every once in a while to change her morphine drip, but was instructed to say nothing to her.

He pressed the intercom button so she could hear him "Are you ready to talk, Mishca?"

In his experience, most people put in solitary confinement with no human contact jump at speaking with someone after such a long silent period – even if it was just to insult him. But Mishca didn't say a word, only smiled slightly at the camera and shook her head.

"What will you do if she doesn't talk, Ryuzaki?"

"She'll talk"

"But, if she _doesn't_…"

"I'll make her. I've gotten information out of the toughest criminals – I'll get what I need."

"But she's no criminal"

"There's no proof of that."

"There's no proof that she is, either."

"Those scars are evidence enough… they point to something… I need to know what that something is."

"Do you hear yourself Ryuzaki? What if she was just a victim?"

"If she was just a victim, she wouldn't try her best to keep it from me. No, there's something else. "

Watari shook his head and stared at Mishca through the glass. He couldn't help but think of her as one of his children, he cared for her just as he cared for L – she was special. He couldn't stand seeing one of his children doing this to another, it just wasn't right.


	25. Chapter 24: The Monster Emerges

Chapter 24: The Monster Emerges

It had been a little over a week, and L was getting frustrated that he hadn't even obtained one piece of information out of her. He was tired of not knowing, he would have to change his tactic soon –basic confinement wasn't working.

"Anything yet?"

L breathed deeply, "no"

"Hasn't she been through enough Ryuzaki? Why put her through all of this just because she knew B?"

L spun in his chair to face him, eyes wide - "So, she did know him? – What haven't you been telling me Watari?"

"…It is true… that at one point they knew each other."

"Unbelievable" he said, fuming. All's he could think was that this girl had dug her way so deep that she had Watari keeping things from him. How did she manage that? He couldn't help but feel played – he clenched his jaw, enraged. This was just the push he needed to do something he didn't want to.

"Thank you for that Watari – please go remove the morphine drip."

"It's not finished yet"

"I am fully aware of that fact –I'm not asking you to replace it. Remove it, entirely."

"Pardon me?"

"I will get someone else to do it if you will not."

Watari looked at L shocked, "Yes, I understand"

He watched as Watari entered the room and carefully removed the piece from Mishca's arm. He noted that she didn't say anything to him, just gave him a look like she knew it was coming. Watari gave her an apologetic look as he wheeled the morphine drip out of the room.

For the next four days L had a difficult time watching her. The pain medication wore off quickly, within hours, and left her in excruciating pain. He hated to see her like this – but his anger was fighting hard to wash away the feeling of regret he had. He watched as her hands and limbs shook from the pain. She hadn't slept once since she'd been taken off her pain medication, the pain was too much for her to sleep. Her eyes had gone bloodshot and were welled up with tears. As much as he was struggling with what he had to do, he had accomplished something finally.. she was visibly vulnerable now, this was the time to push her.

He leaned forward towards the mic and pressed down on the intercom button, "You knew B. I've found out that much, it's not merely a speculation anymore, but a fact."

He paused to see her reaction, but there wasn't one.

"That would be check – your move, I suggest you start talking."

At this she raised her head towards the camera and smiled, shaking her head. "Have you learned nothing from me?" Her bloodshot eyes stared him down.

He didn't respond – unsure of where she was taking this.

She laughed slightly, "You haven't even seen the cards yet, and you're already bluffing…. You're playing the wrong game, my love."

He was thinking of a comeback before he was thrown off by what she had called him. 'What did she just call me?' His eyes softened and lips parted - his anger was pushed aside for that moment, allowing himself to revel in the sweet words. The joy lasted very briefly, as his mind pushed it aside, classifying the words as trickery.

"It appears… she has changed tactics as well." He said aloud to himself.

He couldn't let her pull at his heart strings, he needed the information she had – he had to be cold and unforgiving to get it. He couldn't let his emotions get in the way – not this time.

"Pretending to care for me won't work Mishca."

She looked hurt, "I do care."

"Then tell me what I need to know."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"For the same reason I push you away"

"And that would be?" He looked into her eyes, his internal struggle grew more difficult to handle at each word she spoke.

"It's too dangerous….You just need to trust me, L. You don't need to know."

Trust her? He thought, he wished he could, but his mind wouldn't let him.

A couple weeks later

She had gotten used to the pain, she was no longer shaking, she even dared to put herself through some leg exercises to pass the time. Watari disapproved of her stubbornness, he'd prefer if she had a physical therapist to assist her. For all he knew, she could be making it worse, but L didn't allow anyone to see her.

For the past week or so, he watched as he refused her meals, he didn't even allow her a drink of water. It didn't seem to faze her, and if it did affect her, she didn't bother to show it. L was beyond frustrated, any relation to BB was enough for him to think the worst, and her not talking only enhanced his suspicion of her being involved in one of BBs games – was she his accomplice? Why was she here? He had to know the history of the two's relations, it was difficult to determine her motive without knowing the past. At this point, he was certain that she had manipulated him and Watari from the beginning, pretending to care about them in order to gain their trust to get close… to do what, he had no idea, but he had had enough. He was irate, the more he watched her the less he viewed her as a love interest and the more he viewed her as a criminal – getting him to fall for her was her plan, wasn't it? To make it easier to strike later when his guard was down? It was a good plan, he thought, and he grew angrier at the fact he fell for it.

This game had to end. He wanted his answers damn it and he didn't care how he got them anymore.

Watari walked over to where L sat when he heard him tapping on a button. "What are you doing?"

"Increasing the heat to 37.7 Celsius"

Watari breathed in sharply, "You can't do that to her"

L spun around to look at him, "It's done. She's been in there for nearly a month and hasn't said a word, I have to push her harder."

"What does it matter if she knew B? There's no reason to put her through this. It doesn't change anything"

"It changes everything, Watari. It's already changed you… why did you not tell me when you found out?"

Watari's gaze went to the floor, and L turned back around when he didn't answer, he pressed the temperature button again and increased it to 40 degrees Celsius.

"I was trying to protect you"

"From what?" L snapped

"Yourself – do you not see what you are doing?"

At that Watari left, not being able to cope with what his eyes were seeing.

A few hours later

Watari re-entered the room to check on L, he was hoping he had put the temperature back down. A human body can only take so much heat.

He was appalled at what he saw, Mishca was wrapped up in a ball in the corner of the interrogation room, sweating and shaking. Her skin had gone pale, he could see a few heat rashes that had emerged on her limbs. She rocked herself back and forth and mumbled to herself, there was no way L would keep it at 40 degrees Celsius this long, Watari thought.

As he got closer to L he heard him tapping on a button, he quickly moved and grabbed him by the wrist to stop him, L glared at him as Watari saw the temperature on the screen, he had just increased it to 41.11 degrees. "What are you doing?" he asked as they watched Mishca run to the toilet and vomit – she had already felt the increase in heat, she looked horrible as she limply tried to make her way back to the corner, but she couldn't make it. She fell in the center of the room and landed on her bad arm, she cried out in pain.

"Are you ready to talk _now_?" L asked roughly as he tore his wrist away from Watari. He had let his anger replace anything he felt for her, it was what he had to do, he reasoned with himself, he couldn't focus on his feelings, he wouldn't get what he needed that way, he had to treat her like a criminal.

"Stop this Ryuzaki! Can't you see her body is failing to regulate its core temperature?" Watari yelled at him, but was only ignored.

"I told you – you don't need to know.. its…its best.. if you don't know" a faint, shaky voice was heard through the speakers.

L gritted his teeth, he had never seen someone so strong, she should have cracked by now.

Watari pushed L out of the way and pressed the intercom, "Mishca, please say something"

She titled her head, "Watari?" she whispered hoarsely, "Yes.. please say something so we can get you out of there!"

He watched as L hit the button again as she spoke

"I can't .. I won't…" she shook her head, "it will put him in danger..its better.. if I stay in here"

At this L shot his head up, his expression softened a bit. Dangerous for him.. better if she stayed in there? Shouldn't she be begging to get _out_? He thought back to how she protected him from the men at the club… how she gave him permission to do what he thought he needed to do with her… she had put her life in his hands, completely, without a second thought. He had never been more confused, she still didn't make any sense.

She felt another increase in heat, it was too much, she tried to breathe deeply but it got caught in her throat, she gasped for air. Her body shook violently

"L…" she forced, he sat there watching her struggle, he hoped she'd finally talk, his feelings were starting to force their way back through.

"Yes? Is there something you wish to tell me?"

"Do.. you.. understand.. yet?"

Watari tried to interrupted them "Ryuzaki, stop this! You're going to kill her!"

"Please elaborate." He ordered her as Watari shoved L out of the way and began decreasing the heat. He had shoved him so hard that he landed on the floor with a loud thump.

"you asked me once… what.. was so.. important.." her body continued to convulse as she tried to speak, her eyes fought to stay open "that.. I'd.. give up.. my li –"

The two men stared at her as she passed out, both of their mouths agape. L's eyes widened as the sight of her unmoving body pulled all the anger out of him. "What?" he asked quietly, as he swallowed he felt a lump in his throat, his stomach was in knots.

Watari let a low growl come from his throat as he rushed to the door of the interrogation room "She's only trying to keep you safe Ryuzaki, why can't you see that? You should have noticed that when she didn't give you up at the club"

L's breath quickened, none of this made any sense, his hands shook slightly when he realized the very high probability of her dying from heat stroke – at his hand.


	26. Chapter 25: Ryuzaki

Chapter 25: Ryuzaki

After checking for a pulse, Watari had rushed Mishca to the closest bathroom and placed her in the tub. He let it fill with freezing cold water as he ran to the kitchen to get a cup, ice and water for her to drink. On his way back he spotted a filing cabinet and quickly grabbed a note from the first drawer, stuffing it roughly into his jacket pocket.

When he got back to the room he saw L standing at the doorway, his teeth firmly clamped down on his finger. "Watari?" He passed by him, "Not now Ryuzaki!"

L watched as Watari kneeled down beside the tub, placing the glass on the floor. He poured the ice into the tub and turned the faucet off. He filled the empty cup with water and poured it onto her hair, desperately trying to get her body temperature back down to normal. He left the cup floating in the water as he pulled off his jacket and threw it behind him – it was getting in the way.

He poured another cup of water over her head and onto her shoulders, her eyes slowly raised. "Watari?" He clumsily dropped the cup back in the water and reached for the glass on the floor. "Don't talk, just drink", he held the back of her head as he guided the glass to her lips, she drank it all in seconds. Quickly realizing it wasn't enough, he got up and rushed out the door to get more, leaving her alone with L.

L slowly walked towards the tub and crouched down beside it. "Mishca?" his voice was low as his eyes ran across her body, he was a bit uncomfortable at her just being in her bra and panties. It was hard for his heart not to race. His gaze reached her flushed face, he couldn't believe he had actually done this to her. He loved her… regardless of what information she possessed… and he had nearly killed her.

"What did you mean by –" he stopped as she finally looked at him, noticing a tear running down her cheek.

"It doesn't matter", she said hoarsely,

"It does"

"No.. it doesn't. I was wrong about you"

"How do you mean?" He said with hurt in his voice.

"It does suit you"

He stared at her confused as Watari came back into the bathroom, pushing him out of the way. He fell backwards onto Watari's jacket, making something pop out of its pocket. His hand grasped it as he felt it graze his palm. He stood slowly and shoved his hands and whatever he grabbed, into his pockets. He watched as Watari gave her more to drink, wishing he was the one helping her.

"Watari?" he asked, "Not now" was all he got in reply from him.

"Go away… Ryuzaki" his eyes widened, he couldn't have possibly just heard that from her lips.

"What, did you say?"

"GO AWAY, _Ryuzaki_!" He felt his heart drop… she never called him that… never… She enunciated the name, letting him know what she meant by something suiting him… coming from her lips, the name was the most severe insult he could've ever imagined.

His jaw dropped and his chest was constricting… what had he done? He turned and left the room slowly, not knowing what else to do. The blow to his ego and his heart was too much to take, he had ruined everything… was what she knew really all that important? He didn't know anymore, he just knew he hated himself at that moment.

He walked slowly to a special room he had built for him and Watari, he punched in the code and entered the room. Putting his hand back in his pocket he felt the slip of paper and pulled it out. As he unfolded it he read the words. The last three lines stuck out the most to him…

x x x

Will you be able to see _beyond_ the engravings, or will

You become the death of your little angel of justice?

I wait for the day the monster overcomes you.

x x x

He gritted his teeth and crushed the paper with his hand, he felt his whole body shake. "He got me…" his breath went ragged as he connected the note to Mishca and what he had done… he couldn't see past the engravings on her skin, he pushed her so hard she nearly died… she would have, If Watari hadn't of taken her when he had. He swore BB would be laughing at him from the grave… but how could B have known how he would've reacted?

He sat down, bringing his knees into his chest, pressing them close to his body with his arms. He rested his head on his arms.

It took him a few moments more to connect the next dots, BB had obviously known her.. of her status as a detective… he knew of the engravings.. which could only mean that he was the one who caused them. It depressed him when he thought about it, BB had been the first to torture her, and he was the last… he may not have cut into her, but the damage was the same. He felt sick to his stomach, he was no better than BB – a monster.

He stopped trying to put the clues together when the gravity of what he had done finally fell on him. He was in love with Mishca, he couldn't deny it – had argued with her about the importance of her life… and then he almost took that life away. He remembered asking himself what information could be more important than her life – was her relation to BB really more important to him? His lips quivered, how could he have let himself go that far? He thought of how she looked at him with those icey blue eyes and how her lips felt on his.. how they tasted. His hatred for BB drove him to nearly destroying someone he loved – he let a tear escape his eyes. He wiped it away quickly – he hadn't cried since he was little, but he couldn't help it at that moment. Just as he wiped away the first, a few more began sliding down his face.

Just then, Watari entered. "I have never been so disappointed Ryuz-" He stopped as L turned to face him, shocked at his tear stained face. He hadn't seen L cry in ages.

A few days later

L had stayed away from Mishca to let her recover. He had been watching her through the surveillance cameras he had installed in the building – he wanted badly to see her, to hold her in his arms.. he wanted so badly for her to forgive him.

"Do you wish me to send for the team Ryuzaki? It's been too long"

"Hmm? Ah.. yes. Have them meet here in three days… basement level 4."

"Understood"

As Watari left the room L headed for Mishca's room.

When he got there he stood at the door, just staring at it, unsure if he should dare enter. After a few moments he knocked softly on the door. He breathed deeply as the door slid open.

"May I, come in?" He asked her

She looked up at him, he couldn't read the expression on her face. She stepped aside and motioned for him to enter. She walked over to her bed and sat down slowly, he felt remorse as he watched her wince as she did so. He walked over to where she sat and put his hands in his pockets. He stared at her for a moment, she was so beautiful, he thought.

"What is it?" She asked roughly, snapping him out of his thoughts.

"I came to see, how you were doing"

"I'm fine, considering – but I told you I'd be fine"

"I've never seen such resilience… such, stubbornness"

"I'll take that as a compliment"

He sat down on the other edge of the bed, facing her, in his usual manner.

"Will you at least tell me why you refuse to tell me anything?"

She sighed, "It's better that way –"

"But why?"

"It would be harder to protect you.. if you knew" she whispered.

He cocked his head to the side, not understanding.

"What is it.. that you're protecting me from?"

She just looked at him and smiled slightly.

He gathered she wouldn't say.

"…I don't know what I would've done.. if you had actually died" he spoke softly.

"It'd be better for you, if I had"

"Don't say that" He ordered.

"You'd be safer that way" She said quietly, looking down at the bed.

"Stop, Mishca"

"It's true"

"I said stop" He said firmer. "I don't like when you talk like this"

"Sorry Ryuzaki"

His heart fell again, and he gazed into her eyes, hurt. "Don't call me that…"

"But isn't that what you want everyone to call you?"

"Not you"

"But it fits you"

His eyes fell to the blanket below him, she was basically shouting to him that she had known BB around the time of the LABB cases… the time frame was a valuable clue to him, but he couldn't help but push it aside, it didn't matter right then, because the underlining tone in her voice meant that she thought he was just like BB… a monster. And he couldn't disagree… what he had done to her… was monstrous.

"Will you… ever be able to forgive me for what I've done?"

"I already have, you only did what you thought you had to"

She had forgiven him? How? His mind raced, there was no way he'd ever be able to forgive himself for what he had done, so how could she?

"If you've truly forgiven me, why won't you call me by my name."

She looked up at him, wondering if he had realized he'd just given away the fact he didn't hide his first name.

She breathed heavily and whispered the only explanation she could think of. "Because... I classify 'L' with someone who I care deeply for, someone who cares deeply for me... 'Ryuzaki'… he's someone who just causes pain by being close... " He looked away and stood up.

She shook her head, "L's not here right now, I only see –"

"A monster." He interrupted and began walking away. "You were right – you should leave. I won't force you to stay… it's not me who should stay away from you… it's the other way around." He left feeling completely distraught – he had truly ruined everything – and BB had won.


	27. Chapter 26: Regret

Okay – sorry it took so long to get this chapter up, I had a mini-breakdown… had 3 ideas of how this chapter could have went… have been wracking my brain all week trying to decide which one to use! Obviously I have finally decided… ;) Sorry to have upset so many of you with the last few chapters, but trust me when I say things **do** get better for them… I swear!

AND I feel like L is super OOC in this story which bugs the #%$! out of me – I hope it's not too bad. Hopefully my next story will be better (when I ever get around to finishing this one that is…)

Anyway, thank you so so SO much for all the reviews *does a happy dance* .. and now! Back to the story… =D

* * *

><p>Chapter 26: Regret<p>

Mischa sat there staring blankly at the door after he left, she didn't know which thought to focus on first… the fact that he thought of himself as a monster, or the fact that he had just told her to leave. She breathed in deeply as her mind reeled.

It was true, she had forgiven him for what he had done, he's L afterall – there was no way he was just going to shrug off what he saw carved into her skin. He only did what he thought necessary, it's impossible, even for the great L, to "turn off" that side of him. He's a detective, plain and simple, getting answers is what he does, even if the method used isn't exactly kosher. 'Would I have done anything different if the tables were turned?' She didn't think so… their level of determination matched each other's, she would have surely done the same thing.

She knew calling him Ryuzaki would completely disarm him, it gave away a piece of information she didn't want to give, but it had to be done in order to push him away. She knew L would understand what she was comparing him to when she called him that, and she was successful in turning him away. Of course she would be… comparing him to someone he so vehemently detested… This had been what she was trying to accomplish for so long – wasn't it?… So why did it feel so, horrible? So, wrong?

She wasn't even entirely sure how L could just give her permission to leave, either. He suspected her of something didn't he? How could he just let a suspect walk right out of his grasp? L isn't one to let anyone go… '_unless_… no, that's ridiculous… he couldn't….?' She tried to shake the thought from her mind, trying to reason with herself that he wouldn't let emotion get in the way and that they only shared a mutual crush on each other… it couldn't have actually developed into something serious, could it?

And why _did_ it hurt her so much for him to be close to her? It wasn't the fact that he reminded her of BB… that pain had stopped a long time ago… no.. the pain was because she can't protect him and be with him at the same time…. The fact that once he does find out everything, he wouldn't want her anyway. "Crap" she breathed out heavily, as her bottom lip began to quiver, had she really fallen in love with him?

"You're just giving up, just like that?"Watari asked as L re-entered the room. He had obviously been watching the scene as it unfolded.

"Some privacy would have been appreciated." L sat in his chair in front of the monitors that shown Mishca's room. He sighed as he watched her, she sit on the bed with her head in her hands.

"You want her to leave? It seems a bit ridiculous for the both of you to go through all this, for her just to _leave_."

"Of course I don't want her to leave" he mumbled as he pressed a button to switch off the monitor. He couldn't bear to look at her anymore.

"Then wh –"

"If she has any sense, she'll take my offer and get as far away from me as possible" he said bluntly as he hopped out of his chair, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I'll be on the roof, please do not disturb me unless it's an emergency."

"Understood"

Mishca stood in front of her full length mirror staring at her reflection. She was torn between staying and taking his offer. Which way was right? She had admitted that she wanted to stay… she could ensure his safety that way, keep an eye on him… be close… but leaving… leaving removed the danger of her knowledge completely, for the both of them. 'Staying would be so selfish' she thought, the other side of her yelled back that she deserved to be selfish… when was the last time she got what she wanted, anyway?

She moved her fingers slowly to her watch and unclasped it, gently removing it from her wrist. She backed away from the mirror and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the watch. It was no ordinary watch, there was no reason for it to be so extravagant… he did it on purpose… he may not have known the reason back in the beginning, but it was evident that it was more than just a tracking device to him. She sighed and placed the watch next to her on the soft surface below before standing up and walking out the door.

The wind blew his hair around violently, making it even messier than it usually was. The building was massive, he could see everything from the rooftop. 'Mishca would like this' he thought, hoping to show her if she stayed…. Hoping that she would just _stay_. He was quickly regretting the words he had spoken earlier, he wished he could take them back.

She walked slowly into the main area to find Watari sitting at the computer. "Ah, how are you feeling today, Mishca?"

She smiled softly, "Alive."

"Is that good?"

"It's painful. Is L not working now?"

"He's on the roof, but, is there, something I can do?"

"Actually, there is… Tatum… I.. I need to see him, where was he –"

Watari smiled faintly, "Of course, I'll print you out directions, just a moment."

Mishca stood there, her palms sweating fiercely, until finally, "Here you are my dear"

"Thanks" she said as she grabbed the sheet and began walking towards the exit.

"When were you going to visit him? Would you like me to take you there?"

"Oh.. I, no, no need to drive me….i'd prefer to do this alone…"

"Of course" he nodded his head.

"Thanks so much, Watari… for everything." She said as she quickly left the room and raced up the basement stairs to the lobby. She only had a few moments, she was sure, there was only one shot, she had to take it now, before he changed his mind.

She swallowed and felt a large lump in her throat as she exited the building, the harsh wind slammed into her body as she waved down a taxi.

L impatiently waited for the elevator to reach her floor, he had decided that he was **L**, he _could_ take back what he said, he could do just about anything, and damnit, he changed his mind so why couldn't he do this? It didn't matter what she thought of him, and he knew he'd never hurt her again, she had to stay, and he wasn't going to let her go, he couldn't, how would he ever know if she was okay if she wasn't under his roof? She was staying, period.

The elevator stopped at her floor and he quickly darted to her door. He knocked twice and waited for a response. He waited, and knocked again. "Mishca, open the door." He stood there nervously… since when did **L** get nervous? "Mishca, I know you must hate me, but please open the door, there's something I need to say" His breath picked up pace as all he heard was silence, "Please… open the door" he spoke softly as he pressed on the door. The door had not been completely shut before and it slid open at the pressure of his hand. He popped in his head scanning the dark room. He sighed heavily, relived that she wasn't in there. She had to be somewhere else in the building, probably with Watari. He rushed to the basement and found him.

"Mishca?"

"You just missed her, by a few minutes"

He let a low growl escape his lips, getting annoyed at chasing around to find her. He poked at a few keys on the computer and a schematic of the building displayed on the screen. He typed in her tracking id, seconds later the schematic switched to where the tracking device was located…her bedroom. He gritted his teeth, irritated at himself. If he would just have waited there a few more minutes he would've caught her.

He rushed back up to her room and knocked again, sure that she was inside. When there was no answer, he decided to enter, fed up with the chase. He just wanted to get out what he had to say. The door slid open to reveal the room still coated in darkness, he switched on the light and looked for her, reasoning with himself that she may just be sleeping. He quickly looked through all the rooms and then entered the bedroom last. The bed was neatly made, no Mishca to be found. He stepped forward as he noticed the light bouncing off of something on the bed. He picked up the watch between his thumb and pointer finger, staring at it wildly. His heart was beating so rapidly it felt like he was going to die. He dejectedly sat on the bed, not bothering to sit in his normal posture, there was no point, there was no point to anything, she was gone.

Mishca had been sitting in front of Tatum's gravestone for over an hour, silently crying and reminiscing about old times. "I'm so sorry, this is all my fault."

"How could any of this be your fault?" The deep voice from behind her made her jump. She turned around to tell whoever it was to mind their own business, but when she turned she saw a tall, neatly dressed man with brown hair and a pronounced jaw line. He opened his mouth to show a perfect smile, "Heya stranger"

"Cadyacce?" She gasped in surprise, jumping up and embracing him. "What are you doing here?"

She let go as he replied, "my best friend gets killed, and you think I wasn't going to find out about it? I had to come."

"How long have you been here?"

"Not long, but now that I've found you I may just stay a bit longer. Where are you staying?"

"Nowhere, at the moment. I was actually going to find a hotel later and see if I could solve a few cases that have been piling up."

"Cases? That was a short retirement."

She smiled, "You know me."

"Yea, you and your puzzles. Need any help?"

"Very funny… you know you can't"

"At least stay at my hotel, I haven't seen you in ages"

"Alright" She smiled as he walked her to his car.

"How many cases are you looking at solving?"

"Oh I don't know… a hundred seems like a good start."


	28. Chapter 27: The First Move

Chapter 27: The First Move

'What am I doing here?' she questioned herself as she walked slowly towards the central building of ToHo University. It had been a little over a month since she left, she spent most of her time solving the built up cases that had been sent to her over the past year, she had managed to solve all of them within a very short timeframe. Cadyacce had poked at her, always calling her a workaholic and an insomniac. She remembered when she had told L that she couldn't be locked away all day solving cases… that she needed to get out… she remembered how foreign the words felt on her tongue. She didn't really care about going out, yes, there was entertainment in going out, but she had only said that to get away from him, and nothing was as enjoyable as solving her puzzles. The truth was, she preferred her puzzles. When one case was finished, she immediately opened another one, but they all lacked something. None of them were as difficult, as profound as the KIRA case, and she was itching to catch him, but she didn't know how L would react if she had just randomly popped back into the picture. And it didn't help, that her nightmares had returned as soon as she left. L had unknowingly vanquished all of her BB nightmares when she had been there, but after she had left her nights were repeatedly plagued with L's death, over and over again. She had eventually given up on sleep and only managed to get rest when her body wouldn't let her stay awake any longer. It seemed that her feelings for him wouldn't leave, every day was a constant reminder that she had left. She missed him terribly, Cadyacce was a good friend, good company, but there was no one like L. She didn't know what she'd do if she ran into him at the university, or what he would do, for that matter. She only hoped that she could investigate a bit on her own so she could still protect him, but she quickly realized she wouldn't be able to get close to Light Yagami without popping up on L's radar. But, she was still determined to try, if nothing else, she hoped to rattle the boy's cage a bit.

She reached the entrance ceremony and chose a seat towards the front, not too close and a little off to the side, hoping she wouldn't be noticed. Not yet, anyway. She was thankful that L hadn't terminated her status at the university, he had the power to, so why hadn't he?

The university dean went on for an hour but she hadn't listened to a word he said. It was unbelievably boring.

"And now, for the freshman address, our freshman representative Light Yagami and Hideki Ryuga!" At that Light Yagami and L took the stage. She couldn't help but stare at L, he was exactly the way she had left him… except he had shoes on. She couldn't help but giggle at how loose his shoes were and wondered what it must feel like for him, to have to wear sneakers. She had to force herself to switch her attention to Light. He was neatly dressed and his hair was perfect, he looked groomed for success. Everyone in the audience was chattering at the difference between the two, all favoring Light. 'If they only knew' she thought to herself. She watched as they shook hands and sat down next to each other, she was sure L was making his move. She began to wish she sat just a little closer to the front so she could've eavesdropped. She couldn't help but wonder what Light had to be thinking at that moment.

As the ceremony ended she walked out of the building and spotted Watari's car. She quickly changed her course so she wouldn't be seen. She was still close enough to hear L call out to Light, telling him that it was good to meet him and that he'd see him around. Watari sped off with L inside without noticing her, she sighed in relief as she noticed Light walking in her direction. He had to be taking the subway to get home, she thought, this was her time to make a move. She began to walk away, slowly enough so that Light would catch up to her quickly at his pace. She began walking at his pace once he was next to her.

"You know, you two are an odd combination"

"Excuse me?" Light replied arrogantly.

She looked to her side and gave him an innocent look,

"Oh its nothing, you two just don't look like ones to be friends… so, _different_"

"That would be because we're not friends"

"Rivals then?" She raised an eyebrow, matching his cockiness.

"What is it to you?"

"Curious is all"

"Don't be. Who are you, anyway? It's obvious you're not from around here."

"What is it to you?" She said trying to annoy him, she wanted to see first-hand how he handled his emotions.

"It'd be nice to know who is following me"

"You're a paranoid little thing aren't you? It's cute, like I'd actually want to follow you." She laughed, "What's so great about _you_?"

"I'm Light Yagami, don't you know who I am?"

"I do now. Well, thanks for the engrossing conversation Light, but I think I will be off to the subway now." She quickened her pace.

He stopped in his tracks and wrinkled his forehead, he had never had to explain his greatness. Everyone had always just known, and girls followed him everywhere trying to get his attention. So why wasn't this girl the same as all the others? He quickly jogged back up to her.

"Hey, wait a minute. I'm going to the subway too"

"So who's following who now?"

He rolled his eyes, "Right. So what's your name?"

"Mishca"

"Mishca… you're the one who got second place on the entrance exams, aren't you?"

She nodded "That's me"

They reached the subway station and both got on the same car, choosing a seat in the back.

"So what will you be studying Mishca?"

"Criminal justice."

Light smirked, this could be fun, he thought to himself. "Same here, I hope to be a detective one day."

"Is that so? I've interned as one, it's a great field isn't it? So exciting!" She put on her biggest flirty smile and he smiled back at her.

"Yes, it is. Where did you intern?"

"Back in the States."

"Interesting… I figured you were American. You know, I've helped solve a few cases for the NPA."

"Really? How did you manage to get in there?"

He laughed, this girl really didn't know a thing about him, he'd have to educate her. "My father works there, Chief Yagami… ring a bell?"

"Mmm.. no, no bells. Sorry." She smiled again as she looked around.

"That's alright… hey… what do you think about KIRA?"

She stood up as the car came to a stop, "Some other time, this is my stop. It was nice talking to you" She started walking away as she felt him reach out for her wrist,

"Wait, then over coffee maybe?"

She giggled. "No thanks. But hey, I'm sure I'll see you in some of my classes."

He gritted his teeth slightly, she, rejected _him_? Since when does that happen?

She pulled her wrist back and exited the subway car smiling, knowing she had irritated him just enough that he'd try to approach her later. He had to, his personality, his ego… he had to show her how great he was, that he deserved her praise and that she should be thanking him for even offering to take her out. She giggled to herself as the subway car continued on its circuit, she couldn't help but find it funny that they had just met, and one of the things he wanted to talk about was KIRA.

For the rest of his ride on the subway Light began to fume about his encounter with L. The more he thought about it, the more he grew angry.

When he got home he slammed the door behind him,

"How'd it go today freshman representative?" Sayu said curiously as her brother entered the house. She was taken aback when he ignored her and went straight upstairs

FYI – I won't be re-writing everything that happened in deathnote, it would take too long. But Obviously, this was the day when L told Light who he was, etc.


	29. Chapter 28: Confrontations and Pastries

Chapter 28: Confrontations and Pastries

Mishca was walking around the campus trying to clear her head. It was only the fourth day and pretending to be a University student was already getting on her nerves, there was no way she was going to keep this up. "Hey, Mishca!" she heard quick footsteps behind her, she turned and smiled when she saw who it was, he was in shorts and was carrying a tennis racket.

"Hello Light"

"I haven't seen you in any of my classes"

"Oh, you were looking were you?"

He smirked at her arrogance, "I only mention it because everyone else seems to be complete idiots, I was hoping to have at least one other intelligent person besides me in my classes"

She laughed, "I'm sure they're not all stupid"

"Trust me, they are. And you owe me a conversation over coffee if I do recall correctly."

"Persistent, aren't you?"

"I get what I want"

"Is that so?"

They walked near the tennis courts and he slowed down

"Always… so, about that cup of coffee, how about tomorrow around noon?"

She shook her head, "And what exactly is it, that you're after?" she said as she leaned up against the tennis court fence.

He stood in front of her and placed one arm at the side of her face, intertwining his finger with the metal of the fence. He leaned in and spoke confidently.

"A conversation… some coffee, with an intelligent, attractive girl." He stared into her eyes as he smirked.

She breathed heavily, "Alright then" In her mind she was smiling, this is exactly what she wanted. To get him alone and see how his brain worked and to initiate her sneak attack, a conversation over coffee… yea.. that was perfect… and the best part, he thinks that it was his idea.

"Great, I'll see you at noon then"

Just then she heard a familiar voice from behind him, coming from a ways away. "Hey Light!"

She peaked around Light's shoulder just enough to catch a glimpse without her face being seen. She saw L with a tennis racket and she quickly turned back to Light, "Still not friends?" she nagged him.

"Shut up"

She laughed, "See you later Light" At that she quickly walked in the other direction, making sure her face was turned to the tennis courts as she walked by, pretending to watch the people play.

"Ready to play?" L asked Light as he watched the girl walk away. The way she walked and carried herself reminded him of Mishca, and his heart hurt when he reminded himself that she was gone. It had been over a month, but it didn't matter, he'd do anything to get her to come back.

"Yea, but Ryuga, did you know how good I was when you asked to play tennis with me?"

"Don't worry Light, I used to be the British Junior Champion"

"So… you grew up in England?"

"I lived in England for about five years…. But please relax, it's absolutely impossible to figure out L's identity from that fact"

The two of them walked onto the court and Light quickly saw that L was still wearing the same outfit. 'That's… a bit peculiar… especially for a tennis match…'

"So, just one set, whoever wins six games first is the winner. All right with you?"

"Fine"

They took their positions on either side of the court, L bounced the ball a few times and threw it high into the air. On its return down L slammed the ball into the corner box, acing Light right off the bat.

"Whoa! Ryuga, ever heard of warming up?"

"He who moves first always wins"

Mishca walked slowly around the back of the tennis court to take a peak, with L's back facing her she was sure that she'd be safe. She watched as they battled for the victory, the weight of the ball could be heard smacking up against the clay ground and each of their sneakers squeaked as they raced to get to the ball. A crowd quickly emerged on the other side of the court, everyone cheering for who they thought would win. Things got heated pretty fast, and a referee and a linesman got on the court to assist.

The game progressed quickly, it was now 5 to 4 and L needed this game to tie it up. They were both sweating but seemed strangely calm. 'Game point for Light… come on L you need to send that ball flying back at him, don't let him –' Light crashed the ball onto L's side of the court so fast that L almost knocked himself down to get to it, his racket missing the tennis ball by inches. 'Come on!' she thought, disappointed. "Set won by Light Yagami! 6 games to 4!" She decided it was time to leave, she couldn't chance them walking past her. She glanced back at the tennis court when she got far enough away, and watched as the two left together.

The Next Day

Mishca walked into the small café shop and spotted Light sitting in the corner, she walked up to him and sat down. "Hey Light"

"Hey"

"So what's good here?"

"Get whatever you like"

"Uh.. okay" The waitress came up to her and she ordered a latte and slice of cheesecake.

"What's the matter Light, you seem off"

"My father had a heart attack yesterday"

Mishca's mouth dropped open, she had assumed KIRA was insane enough to kill his own flesh and blood, but it was still hard for her mind to grasp that idea. "Was it, KIRA?" She asked shocked.

"No.. no.. stress I guess… it's this case he's working on…"

She reached out and placed her hand over his, testing the water. "I'm so sorry…Is he… okay?"

"He'll be alright…"

"I have this funny feeling you're not telling me something"

He removed his hand from hers, brushing it through his hair and sighed heavily.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you"

"Try me"

"I was approached by someone… they've asked me to help with the KIRA investigation"

"That's…"

"Hard to believe, right?"

"I was going to say, amazing, actually."

Her latte and cheesecake arrived; she smiled as the dish reminded her of L.

"Who approached you.. exactly?"

"L himself"

"Really? Why would L want you?"

"My deduction capabilities are quite exceptional."

"Or, he thinks you are KIRA." She said as she pointed her fork at him as she swallowed a mouthful of cheesecake.

He raised his eyebrow "Why would you say that?"

"Because I suspect you of being KIRA, Light."

"You don't even know me, how could you accuse me of –"

"Likewise. Who am I, Light?"

He stared at her, visibly infuriated.

"Nothing? And here I thought you said you had great deduction capabilities…" She drank what was left of her latte and pushed the unfinished cheesecake towards the center of the table. "And I must say, it was rather touching, showing your misfortune with your father, it was almost believable… almost. I'm sure you'd prefer him out of the way though, isn't that right, KIRA?"

"How dare you, who the hell do you think you are?"

She stood up and walked next to him, "Someone here just to remind you that even if you were successful in taking L down, which I know is your goal, there is still many others that will be coming after you."

She began walking away but turned slightly to say one last thing, "Oh, and Light… a wise man once said that nearly all men can stand adversity. If you want to test a man's character, give him power… what you have done with this power, is malevolent... Don't fool yourself into thinking you're a god, you are a wicked, evil little boy who's only playing god."

At that she walked out of the café, smiling to herself.. If he thought he could just kill L and go on with trying to rule the world, he was sadly mistaken. She had quite enjoyed the look on his face and replayed it a few times in her head as she walked down the street past all the shops. She giggled slightly, it felt so good to confront him. Now, it was time to focus on getting evidence on the bastard. But how could she do that, she wondered, that was the hardest part.

She was pulled out of her deep thoughts when she looked up and saw a familiar car parked outside of a pastry shop. She tried to pass it as quickly as she could but it was no use. Watari had walked out of the shop with bags in his hands, with L standing next to him face in a box eyeing all of the sweets inside. His head popped up when he heard Watari speak "Mishca? Is that you?" he questioned. The box L was holding crashed to the ground and his eyes widened. Mishca's mouth dropped, 'SHIT!' was all she could think, what the hell was she supposed to do! What freaking luck.

"Get in the car" L ordered.

"I'd rather walk"

"Get – in – the- car" he pointed. She hadn't seen him like this, he actually looked quite furious.

"I.. uuuhh"

"Easy Ryuzaki" Watari ordered him as he began placing the bags in the trunk.

L opened the back door and pushed her gently into the backseat, closely following behind. She bit her bottom lip as Watari got in the car and sped off, with L adamantly staring at her from the other seat. She bit down harder on her lip, nothing ever worked out the way she intended, and she didn't know what to do.


	30. Chapter 29: Irrelevant

Okay, _one_ more chapter this weekend for you guys, since you are all **AWESOME**. I figured I made you sad enough with some previous chapters, so I shall (hopefully) make you happy with this one!

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><p>Chapter 29: Irrelevant<p>

Mishca walked slowly behind L as they entered the investigation room at HQ, everything looked exactly the same. He was still silent and it was driving her crazy, why wouldn't he just talk? She just wanted to get this over with, she knew she was going to get an earful and the quicker it happened, the better.

"Mishca!" Came the excited voice of Matsuda, "You're back! How are you?"

She smiled, "Alive and well, Matsu." Looking around she noticed that everyone looked extremely disheveled and exhausted.

Matsuda walked slowly up to her and lowered his head, "Please forgive me Mishca, it was all my fault, I should have never said that at the club, I don't know what I was thinking!"

"It's alright. Please don't beat yourself up over it. I'm okay"

She leaned forward and let Matsuda hug her, "I'm so sorry"

"Its okay Matsu, really"

"No, its not. Tatum is dead because of me."

"That wasn't your fault"

"Not that this reunion isn't touching, but what _are_ you doing back Mishca? Ryuzaki said your internship was over –"

"Give it a break, Aizawa!" Ukita said under his breath.

"Mishca was never an intern…" L spoke softly and everyone turned to face him, watching as he dug into one of his new pastries.

"She's the fourth greatest detective –"

"Third now… actually." Mishca interrupted, L glared, questioning her with his eyes.

"Regardless, she was here under that guise at my request…. She had other things to attend to so I gave her leave."

"So you lied to us, _again_!" Aizawa huffed.

"It's not that big of a deal Aizawa, this is pretty cool actually! 1st and 3rd greatest detectives… whoa –"

"Shut it, Matsuda"

"She'll be assisting us with this case again." L spoke in between bites. 'Thanks for volunteering me L' Mishca rolled her eyes.

Ukita walked forward, "It's good to have you back, Mishca."

"Yea. We all value your input." Mogi added.

"Thanks guys"

"Right – now if you would all please return to your homes, you can resume your work tomorrow afternoon once you've gotten adequate rest."

The team poured out of the room and Mishca walked towards an empty seat next to L. She sat down and started looking through the documents that were laid across the table. She could feel his eyes burning into her. "Anything new?" she asked, trying to break the ice.

"What are you doing?"

She looked at him, "Trying to get caught up – I missed a lot you know.. and if I'm to help again it'd be nice to know what's going on"

He just stared at her, she couldn't read the emotion in his eyes. "I am… supposed to be helping, right? Why else did you bring me back here?"

"Yes… of course. But… do you not require rest as well?"

"Rest? What for?"

"Being back in Japan hasn't thrown off your schedule?"

"Back in Japan? What makes you think I ever left?" She squinted her eyes in confusion, L wasn't one to make assumptions.

L bit down on his thumb, 'she was here all this time', he had thought she would go back to the States.

"I see... KIRA's still executing criminals… Yagami is in the hospital recovering from a stress related heart attack… his son will be joining the investigation when he feels his father is well enough"

"So… you went through with it then? Telling him who you are?"

"Yes"

She sighed heavily, "I really wish you hadn't of done that. You're going to get yourself killed."

He smiled slightly, happy that she still seemed concerned for him "He only has my face Mishca, he needs my name, only Watari and myself know it, it's impossible for him to obtain it"

She bit down on her tongue, he really had no idea what she knew.

"Right…"

L let out a forced breath, "You managed to advance to the third slot in a month… that's quite impressive."

"Yea… thanks, I guess"

"So I take it you're no longer retired?"

"That would seem to be the case."

"Indeed. I don't think you know this, but the first three spots were mine."

Her mouth dropped slightly in shock, "… Sorry to break up your monopoly. I didn't realize.."

He smirked, "It's quite alright. I said you could be great, remember? I'm glad you listened."

The two of them sat there in awkward silence for what seemed like hours, both pretending to focus on the case. L scratched his foot with his other and fidgeted in his chair.

"I tried to contact you, you are a very difficult person to find, even for me. Seeing you today was pure chance…"

"Yes.. well.. I got a different phone… and I'm very good at hiding in plain sight when I don't want to be found."

"Yes, I've noticed… twice now."

"You told me to leave though –"

"That was a mistake" he interrupted her, "I'd prefer if you stayed this time" he looked at her expectantly. He kept his composure but his heart was pounding.

She swallowed hard, not knowing what his true meaning was. She stared back into his eyes for a few moments, not knowing what to say to him.

"Your injuries… are they –"

"I'm fine, they've healed. My chest and hips still hurt but it's nothing I can't manage." She looked away, dreading where the conversation was going to lead them.

He smiled slightly but it faded quickly, "Your strength is admirable… however…"

She looked back towards him, "I'm fine, really. Don't worry about me"

"I'm afraid that's impossible" He said softly as he brushed his hand through her hair. She breathed in deeply and shut her eyes. She hadn't expected him to show affection, she was waiting for a lecture ever since she stepped foot back into his HQ, a lecture that she now realized wasn't coming. She opened her eyes again when she felt his hand rest on her cheek. Her eyes met his, "Are you sure, that you're alright?"

She just nodded, her heart accelerating at his touch, all feelings breaking through the dam she had tried to build. She leaned in closer to him yearning for his lips, she couldn't fight her feelings, they always won.

"I never intended to hurt you" he whispered.

"It's okay, I know why you -"

He shook his head, "No, it's not. I was never supposed to hurt you, what I did –"

She felt just as horrible, "L… please" she pleaded

He searched her eyes frantically; he noticed right away that she hadn't called him Ryuzaki. He let out a harsh breath and leaned in closer to her, pulling her face towards him. Their lips grazed each other's delicately; their warm breath could be felt on each other's skin. He pressed his lips onto hers slowly, trying to gauge what her reaction would be. When she didn't resist he pressed harder and felt her hand find its way to his chest. Her soft lips were sweeter than any candy or pastry he'd ever tasted, he moved his hand around her waist, determined to never let her go again.

Moments later they both heard the door behind them open. They quickly recoiled back in their seats and L let out an irritated sigh.

"My apologies Ryuzaki, but Matsuda would like to see Mishca for a moment."

"Yes, of course Watari. Let him in"

"Uh.. hey, Mishca, I was wondering if you'd like to go grab something to eat… it's the least I can do… after everything that happened…"

Mishca smiled at him, "Sure, I am kind of hungry."

"Great!" He exclaimed.

Mishca giggled at how excited he was, it was cute. But she needed this time to clear her head a bit, the day had been extremely chaotic, from confronting Light, to being thrown in the back of Watari's car, and then kissing L? She just needed a minute to _breath_.

"Uh, I mean…That's great… where would you like to go?" he said with a little less enthusiasm.

Mishca stood up and was getting ready to walk towards Matsuda as L whispered, "please return right after your meal" He wanted to spend more time with her, but Matsuda always had the worst timing. She smiled at L and walked towards Matsuda as he was listing off the places they could go.

Watari smiled at the two and bowed as they left the room. He walked over to L and took the empty plate from the desk. "Like she never left."

L didn't respond. "What of your suspicion of her?"

"It's irrelevant at this point."

"Due to the case or your feelings?"

"Both… you said it yourself that the reasons will come to the surface eventually. Interrogating her is pointless… besides; I refuse to put her through that again."

"Understandable" At that, Watari walked away with the dirty dish and left L alone in the investigation room.

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><p>Okay, so that's it for this weekend. 4 chapters, wooh…<p>

I have a lot of ideas bouncing around in my head, all's I can say is I cannot wait to write the chapter that Light comes to HQ… and sees Mishca there. Mwuhahahahaha. That should be very fun to write.

From now on I may take a little longer to get chapters up, I want to try to make them a little longer, a little more detail – I feel like I'm missing points that need to be added.

Please remember to review, I hope you all are still enjoying the story!


	31. Chapter 30: Trap

Chapter 30: Trap

Okay, so tying up a few ends here before I go on any further. Everything I write is done purposefully, and I like to connect what I have previously written to later chapters, it all has meaning. I hope that can be seen – trying really hard to make this a good story – a lot of effort has gone into all these chapters, so thank you so much to everyone who is reading and reviewing, you guys rock!

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><p>Her sneakers collided with the linoleum floor, creating an annoying chew-toy squeak, the steady tapping of Matsuda's dress shoes clicked in her ears. The incessant <em>TAP TAP SQUEAK TAP SQEAK<em> was enough to drive even the calmest person mad. It was as if L created the building with annoying floors just to test the boundaries of her sanity – sanity… had she even gained it back in the first place after what B did to her? After what the others did to her? Even if she had recovered from those incidents, her mind would never be completely sound again. In all honesty, would she have forgiven L so easily if she were _stable?_ The doubt seared her mind.

The irritating shoe sounds ceased as the two entered through the elevator doors. Matuda pressed the button for the lobby and she stared as the bright florescent red numbers of the floor levels ticked slowly upwards. Red, that's what she saw. What was she thinking when she kissed him? Fury raged through her veins.

It was clear enough to her that she had dived right into another sea of insanity –although this time it was voluntary. How did she get to this point? She didn't come here for love, she came to solve an intriguing case, the feelings just sort of, bled in, and they had completely escaped the dam she had built.

Falling in love with the labyrinth that was L. She felt stupid. 'No, come to think of it, stupid is too nice a word.'

They walked out into the lobby, going casually towards the exit. Her precious silence being invaded once more by the nuisance that was their shoes. She stared at her feet as one moved in front of the other, trying to make some sense of what she was doing… what L was doing. The answers seemed so intangible. They reached his car and Matsuda politely opened the passenger side door, he motioned for her to enter and said something, but she only saw his lips move, no sound came to her ears, she was too enraptured by her own thoughts at that point. She merely smiled at him and sat down. Moments later she was staring at the sky, her head pressed against the seat.

Among the team and his case he was cold and calculating, but while alone with her, he was warm and caring in his own way. At the same time she knew he didn't really know how to deal with her emotions or his for that matter. She began to wonder if his emotions were even real – was he just playing with her, like he was playing Light? To get her to open up to him about her past, willingly, instead of trying to pull it out of her forcefully? It was plausible – he's L afterall, he could manipulate anyone, she thought for sure. How easy it would be, to manipulate her in that manner – if it's true, she thought, his kisses are the sweetest manipulation she had ever experienced. Her stupid heart would surely cause her death if she continued down this path.

She couldn't ignore the multiple faces he wore and wondered which one was the true L, if any. How could she really love him, someone who she really didn't know anything about other than what B showed her and what L decided to divulge… which was very little and could all be lies anyway.

She didn't know a damn thing about him, but that didn't stop her heart from racing for him. She found herself in a dangerous trap, the same trap she found herself in so long ago. Her heart raced because she wanted to solve him, be the one to put all the pieces together, be the one who conquered his heart. It sounded all too familiar. She had thought she succeeded in this with B, but the so-called solution shattered in her hands and she was left broken at the reveal of his true self. Hesitance seeped into her mind, was this… thing, with L… would that end up the same way? Her mind connected the question to an answer she had given L, it would surely not end well, getting so close. But she doubted if she could stop herself from going that far. She wanted to go that far… she had to, to find out the undisputable truth, regardless of whether or not it would destroy her this time.

She hadn't seen the warning signs with B, but it was hard not to see them with L when she actually analyzed them like the detective she was. The only problem, the desire to push further, beyond the warning signs that shouted to her, was winning over reason. Did that mean she truly was insane? Would a stable mind decide on something like that? She didn't think so. Maybe L really was merited in asking her if she needed "someone to talk to" that day – maybe she really was nuts.

"Uhh, Mishca, you coming?" Matsuda asked as he held the door open for her, they had arrived at the restaurant while she was in her head. She got out of the car and they walked to the entrance.

"Sorry Matsu, I have a lot on my mind."

"You want to talk about it?" He asked as the hostess showed them to their seats.

The two sat down and she sighed, "I can't."

"OOhh, it's about a different case, isn't it?"

"I suppose… you could say that"

"Is it hard?"

"It's difficulty is tied with the KIRA case."

"Whoa – no wonder why you had to leave! That has to be so stressful, working on two massive cases at once!"

He had no idea she was really just talking about L – but his words still rang true to her. It was extremely stressful and difficult, to try and help on the KIRA case, protect L from herself, and fight her ever-growing feelings for him. Stressful didn't even begin to describe what she felt. She merely nodded in agreement.

"Or, have you solved the other one? Is that why you are back?"

"No, I'm afraid the other is ongoing"

"Anything I can do?" He peered into her eyes hopeful

"No" she said bluntly.

He looked to the side disappointed. "I wish I could be helpful"

They were half way through their dinner when her cellphone rang, she took it out of her pants pocket and saw that it was Cadyacce. She had completely forgotten to call him – he must be worried.

"Hey Cady"

A low growl could be heard from the other line, "Mishca, you could have told me you'd be late. You go to confront a suspect around lunch and you don't come back? For all I know you could have been right about this suspect and he could have killed you!"

"Easy Cady. I got sidetracked is all."

"Don't tell me to be easy, you could have called."

"I'm sorry to have worried you, but really, I had no control over today"

"What exactly sidetracked you?"

She paused, not wanting to say. Cadyacce knew a bit more than Tatum had, and was even there to pick up the pieces after she was tortured for the second time. He wasn't exactly going to be pleased with who sidetracked her, in his eyes, L was scum. He placed all blame on him for what happened to Mishca.

"… _Him_."

"You've got to be joking? You're done with that case, aren't you?"

"No… no I'm not."

"Which question are you answering Mishca?" His voice growing severe.

"Both"

"Where are you now?"

"Out with a friend, dinner."

"Coming back to the hotel after, right?"

"….. I may have different accommodations at this point."

"I really hope that doesn't mean what it implies. Get back here when you're done with dinner, we're not done talking about this."

At that, he hung up on her. He would never shed his over protective brother persona. It annoyed her to no end, she could take care of herself.

"Uh… everything ok, with your girlfriend Katie?"

Her annoyance was replaced with internal laughter, she called him Cady a lot because he _hated_ it, Cadyacce sounded manly he said… Cady just sounded like _Katie_… made him sound like a wuss. That inside joke had been unpredictably helpful at that point, as she didn't want to talk about Tatum's partner – it would only fuel poor Matsuda's guilt over his death.

"Just worried about me is all, can you drop me at her hotel in a bit?"

"Uhhh.. I don't think Ryuzaki would like that…"

"It's not a big deal, I'll be back tomorrow, I swear."

"Uuhh…. Ok.. but you have to come right back, not tomorrow, Ryuzaki will kill me."

"Okay.. so If you come along, will you agree to that then?"

"Yea.. I guess that would be okay, because I could still take you back to HQ"

"Ok, it's agreed then.. only you can't come inside the hotel suite… I don't want Cady asking questions why I am being followed by a police member"

"Oh.. uh, okay. Yea, that's all right."

Flash back to L

It had been hours since Matsuda and Mishca left, they should have returned by now. There was no reason for them to be so late. He fidgeted in his chair, trying not to get frustrated at her noncompliance, but it wasn't working. He wanted her back at HQ, NOW. He quickly targeted where Matsuda was by using his tracking device, his face grew curious when the computer picked up the location, second floor of a popular hotel. Was this were she was staying? Was she gathering her things to return? He decided to give them a bit longer before taking his next step.

An hour later and they still had not returned, L used a secure line to call Matsuda, but was quickly infuriated when he heard his phone ring from the table behind him. "Idiot!"

"Is everything alright, Ryuzaki?" Watari said.

"No, it appears I will have to retrieve the two myself."

"Allow me, you shouldn't –"

"I'll be going, that's final. Mishca needs to understand the importance of following an order."

Watari knew it would be no use to inform him of the dangers, he couldn't change his mind after it had been made.

…

L walked down the corridor of the second floor and found Matsuda sitting crouched against an open wall across from a hotel room. His eyes were closed, the damn fool had fallen asleep. He walked up to him and poked him roughly with his index finger.

"Ahh.. uh.." He stirred and frantically looked around, "Ryuzaki! What are you doing here?"

"Your job. Where is she?"

He pointed to the door across from where he sat, "Talking to her friend Katie."

Without bothering to knock, he turned the knob of the hotel room door, once he realized it was not locked, he entered aiming on taking her by the wrist and dragging her out of there if need be. What he found on the inside, however, was not what he had expected.

"Who the hell are you?" Came a strict voice, it was not the voice of a female companion.

"I could ask the same of you" he replied calmly

Mishca walked in from the other room at that point and her mouth dropped.

"What… what are you doing here?"

"You're late. I've come to retrieve you. It seems you are still incapable of following orders."

"Oh, so that was an order, was it? Last time I checked, I wasn't a prisoner, I'll take my time if I wish." She was irritated that he was being so rude, but also worried that he had shown his stupid face in public. Her whereabouts weren't worth risking his life, 'and yet, his dumbass is here' she thought, fuming.

"You want to tell me what the hell this is, Mishca?"

L shifted his eyes between the two and interjected…

"My name is Ryuz-"

"Shut up!" Mishca interrupted, her eyes wide. Cadyacce was familiar with that name, he knew that was who cut her, and that the culprit was dead. Mishca had shared his death with him, but now regretted it. He knew L had a connection to her, so him using that name just then… No one else knew about that name, not to his knowledge, anyway… there was no way he wasn't going to connect the dots on this one.

"YOU? How dare you step foot in this room!"

L raised his eyebrow, "Curious."

"Leave it alone, Cady" Mishca pleaded, frightened, her world crashing down around her. These two were never supposed to meet, the possibility didn't even seem probable.. and yet… it was happening right before her eyes. 'Damn L, why couldn't he just stay put! He had no problem doing it before!'

"No, I won't" He huffed back at her as he approached L, poking at his chest. "You don't look like much, I bet I could –"

"Please feel free to try, I must warn you though, I am stronger than I appear."

Mishca's eyes widened and she rushed over to them, wedging herself between the two to prevent the brewing fight. She pushed Cadyacce back slightly with her one arm and whispered "Don't touch him" with gritted teeth.

"Still protecting him? I don't understand you, it's _his_ fault." He stared at his friend, furious at which side she had chosen. His attention shifted back to L as his anger increased.

"And while she's protecting you, who the hell is protecting her?"

"I assure you, no harm will come to her"

"Liar!" He yelled, yanking Mishca's arm forward to show the jagged scars around her wrist. "You see this? Huh? This is YOUR fault!" Mishca yanked her arm away, growing more nervous as the seconds passed.

"I can't trust you to keep her safe, you've already proven my point! I won't lose her too, I REFUSE!"

"Too? … I can't convince you, this I know. But don't presume you are the only one here who cares for Mishca."

"Care? You don't give a shit about her! Look at her! Every scar on her body can be traced back to you! If you cared so much, where the hell have you been every time she's needed you?"

L shifted his eyes to Mishca, he knew some scars were his fault, but all of them? How could that be so?

"I'm tired of picking up the pieces of your mess! You have any idea what you've done to this girl? You have completely ruined her life!"

When her mind finally stopped screaming, she blurted out "Okay, that's enough." She lunged forward and grabbed L by his wrist and dragged him out the door, "We're leaving".

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><p>Ok, so in the beginning of this chapter I really wanted to show that L was confusing the crap out of her and she is doubting herself, as well as his feelings. Of course, she isn't in L's mind, so she doesn't know the truth. I hope the first part made sense.<p>

As for Mishca/Cadyacce – they are a tad bit more brother/sister than Tatum was with her. He is very protective of her and is a quick thinker… and… he absolutely despises L… obviously.

Hope you guys liked it... I was a bit nervous about this chapter.


	32. Chapter 31: Jeopardy

Hello my lovely readers! First of all I want to apologize for taking so long to update, I like to update at least once a week but life has been super crazy lately! Plus, I have another story idea playing in my head that has been taking away from this one, it's hard to focus on a new chapter when scenes keep popping up in my head for a completely different story line. That's awesome because I'll have another story after this one, but irritating because I can't focus and I refuse to write more than one story at a time – but not to worry, I am here with another chapter for you! Yay!

And I'm sure some of you are raising your eyebrow and going "What the…" for how I write L sometimes, hopefully I am not destroying him as a character. I truly do believe it's possible for L to crave love and act the way I've written, many people write about the L that we do see… the cold, detached mad genius that he is, but I like to write about the L that we don't get to see, the desire for love, the emotions he suppresses out of necessity… the human. I'm trying my best to do this and still keep L true to his character, it is extremely difficult. I haven't had anyone tell me yet that they don't like how I portray L, so I think that's a good sign… anywho, I'm rambling, back to the story!

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><p>Chapter 31: Jeopardy<p>

L trailed behind her slowly with his hands stuffed into his pockets, his head facing the floor as he picked apart the recent encounter. He raised his head once he heard her open the door to her apartment. Once inside he gently closed the door with his index finger and turned slowly to face Mishca. He sighed heavily as he watched her sit down on the couch and place her head in her hands.

"I didn't take you as the type who needed to be reminded of the importance of keeping my identity hidden."

She shook her head lightly and spoke softly, "I didn't tell him who you are, L"

"Then explain to me how a man whom I've never met was able to determine who I was?"

She let out a harsh breath, "It's complicated."

He walked slowly towards her, stopping a few feet in front of her and crouched down.

"Yes, jeopardizing my identity does complicate things"

"You should have just stayed put, I was coming _back_." The irritation in her voice was plain as day, but it didn't deter him.

"That's beside the point – who was that man?"

She sighed heavily and tilted her head back onto the cushion of the couch. "His name is Cadyacce, he was Tatum's partner."

"Another FBI agent… what exactly is your relation to those two?" he bit down on the tip of his thumb as he waited for her response.

"They found me."

"Found you?"

"The first time"

He squinted his eyes, "After B tortured you"

She nodded her head, "They took care of me… we became good friends."

"So they both saw your scars – but, that doesn't explain how he knew who I was."

"You told him yourself, you and that stupid alias… why did you have to choose that one? Out of every name you could have chosen? He would have never known if you hadn't given him _that_ name."

"I'm afraid I don't see how 'Ryuzaki' could have given away the fact that I am L."

"Ugghh!"

"Very well then, let's stop pretending that I don't know. You knew B when he was calling himself Rue Ryuzaki – am I correct in assuming you told your friend about him?"

She rolled her eyes, "Obviously, no one else knew about Rue besides the three of us, and you of course… you parading around as him in front of Cady was like a neon sign with a big arrow saying 'hey, I'm L!'"

"I see" he stated as he bit down on his thumb harder, focusing in on how she had called him Rue instead of B. It was awkward, and it piqued his curiosity even higher.

"Like I said, you should have just stayed put. You were careless."

"No - Careless is divulging information to those who shouldn't know. Regardless, I will have to ensure your friends silence…"

Her eyes widened, "What do you mean by that? He won't say anything."

"Yes, I'll make sure of that"

She shook her head, "What will you do? He won't say anything, he wouldn't do that to me, he knows how I –" She caught herself just as she was saying too much.

"How you what?"

"It doesn't matter." Her eyes shifted to the carpet beneath her feet. "What will you do?"

"Mmm… I'm not going to tell you that." He spoke sternly as he stood back up.

"Of course not…."

"Although, you can affect how I choose to deal with him."

She looked up at him, hope filling her eyes. "How?"

"Tell me your history with B."

She gritted her teeth, "_Asshole_."

"I was going to let it go – but whatever it is, seems to continually get in the way. I can't have that."

"God damn it, L"

"I have the right to know, it's your fault that I have to use this tactic against you."

"You don't want to know."

"Trust me, I do."

"Are you positive about that?"

"100%"

She shut her eyes, her mind reeling, trying to find the words to describe her past with him – something that wouldn't sound so bad – something that wouldn't disgust L beyond belief. But there wasn't anything she could say, there was no way to sugarcoat this.

Her eyes still closed, she softly spoke, feeling his eyes burning into her. "I was with him."

When she didn't hear a reply she opened her eyes to look at him. He was standing there with a blank expression on his face, just staring at her.

He blinked twice and breathed in deeply, "Please explain."

Her lips parted and her eyes glazed over slightly, if what she saw of him was real, this would devastate him. "I warned you not to get close, to stay away – I don't want to hurt you, L" she whispered.

"_Explain_." He pushed, he wouldn't be satisfied until he heard.

Her chest heaved back and forth from the rapid breaths she was taking in. What choice did she have? She looked away. She had to give him something – some truth. Not what she knew… but the history… most of it she could give away and not even come close to hinting what piece of information she possessed… she could do this… couldn't she? She had to.. even if it hurt L, she had to make sure Cady would be alright. He had done everything for her, she wouldn't forgive herself if anything happened to him. The basic history would be okay to divulge, it's not like she would tell him that she had the one thing KIRA wanted the most. She sucked in a deep breath and began.

"I didn't know who he was, at first. Not for a long time actually… it took months for me to figure it out, and by then it was too late. In the beginning we were just friendly to one another, kept bumping into each other at the oddest places. Finally it came out that we were both detectives, we became engrossed in discussing how exactly we put our puzzles together… so much so that we both wanted to see how the other worked. He was new to it all, he had said, I showed him the ropes on a few things and we partnered up on a couple cases –"

"You were partners" he said, not questioning it but merely stating it as a fact. The words were coated in accusation – like he thought she helped B in the murders.

"… The more time we spent together…" She stopped. Her lips were parted, but she didn't want to go on.

"Yes?"

"The relationship changed."

"Changed?"

"We became… romantically involved." She gulped and forced herself to look back at him.

His lips parted and emotion flashed through his eyes. She couldn't decipher what exactly it was.

"You were… lovers." He said flatly.

She nodded her head and watched as he turned his head to look out the window.

"Did you love him?"

"At the time, I thought - " She whispered.

"A simple yes would have sufficed." At that he turned to leave with her staring after him, hurt in her eyes. He had no idea how complicated it really was – but he had heard enough. She couldn't help but think he would have reacted better if she had lied and said she was B's accomplice… even so, the damage was done and she needed to make sure it was worth it.

"L, Wait! What are you going to do to Cady?"

L stopped by the door and tilted his head but refused to look at her. "He was never in any danger, Mishca. The outcome would have been the same regardless of you speaking or not." He said coolly and exited the apartment.

"You manipulative bastard!" She stood as she screamed after him, furious that she fell for one of his tricks. She should have known better. Her hands shook lightly as she sat back down on the edge of the couch. She brushed a shaking hand through her hair as she breathed heavily, a tear gliding down her cheek. She had just revealed a piece of her history to L that she never wanted to share, explanations vague enough to destroy any feelings he may have had. And what for? For no reason at all.

As L entered the research room he walked passed his usual arrangement of sweets and sat down. "Watari, please connect me to the FBI Director."

"Right away"

Watari gave the phone to L once the Director was on the line.

"Director, you have an agent in Japan by the name of Cadyacce. He is interfering with my investigation and must be removed immediately."

"Interfering? How?"

"The manner in which he is interfering is irrelevant. Please relocate him elsewhere."

"I'm afraid he's on vacation, we can't dictate where he goes when he's not on duty."

"Then place him back on duty – I want him out of Japan today."

"Understood."

"One more thing Director, he is to be watched closely. I'm afraid he has gathered some sensitive information; the reveal of such information would be detrimental to my investigation. Is that clear?"

"Yes, of course."

"I will have Watari send you the details."

-Click-

A Few Days Later

L sat in his chair, back facing the monitors. He didn't feel like working – he didn't feel like doing anything. 'Is this what depression feels like?' he wondered. 'Feels more like betrayal…' He was thinking back on how many emotions she had pulled out of him – this one, being his least favorite.

Watari walked in with a freshly baked pie and sat it on the table beside L. "Would you like me to cut you a slice, Ryuzaki?"

"That won't be necessary."

"You don't want pie? I think we still have some strawberry shortcake left.."

"No."

"Chocolate cake then?"

"I don't want anything Watari."

"What's the matter Ryuzaki? I've never seen you go this long without a sweet."

"It's of no concern."

"I'm afraid it is, I've never seen you so distracted. What is it? Is it Mishca?"

He sighed heavily, "Her and B were together for some time."

"Yes, we gathered that much already."

"But the _way_ in which they were together, Watari…"

"I thought you said it was irrelevant?"

L rolled his eyes. "Nothing is ever irrelevant."

"Am I to understand you have finally discovered the relation between the two? Was she his accomplice like you expected?" He asked, knowing full well that she wasn't.

"Worse."

"How could anything be worse than being involved in murder?"

"He was with her."

Watari stared at L as he fought to speak the words.

"He was with her… the way I wanted to be with her. Do you understand?"

Watari nodded. "Past tense… am I to assume that is no longer your desire?"

"How could it be? After that thing has touched her?"

"It's in the past Ryuzaki. It shouldn't affect your feelings."

"But it does, Watari. I was wrong about her, how could someone fall in love with such a monster? Look at what he did to her, and she loved him? That shows very poor character – she is not who I thought she was."

"Maybe there is more to it than you can see, Ryuzaki."

"Even if there is, I have to contain my emotions. Light will be here soon enough, if he truly is KIRA, any knowledge of this could be used against me later on. It's best to let these feelings die."

* * *

><p>So, a continuation of the constant tug-of-war between the two… but it's necessary, any type of relationship with L isn't going to be all sunshine and lollipops… well… maybe the lollipops… anyway… Have to show L's internal struggle between being L and being human.<p>

The whole scar thing will be revisited later on, and no this is not the end for them, I swear, so don't kill me. – just need to make room for our KIRA…. This should be fun. ;-)

Next chapters will be longer!


	33. Chapter 32: Blinded

Life gets in the way of my writing. Seriously. Can't I just lock myself away for a few weeks and just finish this story? AAHH! I'm SO sorry for the wait :*( I feel terrible :*(

Thanks for the new reviews/alerts/favorites – and a huge thank you to **LightningStar 0.o**, that had to be one of the best comments I could possibly get! I'm trying my best to make Mishca a good OC, so that review made me very happy!

And for all my new quiet readers who have subscribed… reviews are nice… *poke poke* ;-) let me know what you all think :)

* * *

><p>Chapter 32: Blinded<p>

"Mmmm" L sat in his usual position in front of the screens as he shoved candy after candy into his mouth. "Mmmm" His eyes wide as the sugar rushes hit his system. "Watari – bring me cake." He ordered excitedly before sipping his syrup like coffee. His handler nodded and quickly returned with an entire platter of old fashioned _shortcake_ with two layers of _strawberries_ topped with whipped cream. Watari set down the platter and chuckled under his breath before leaving shortly thereafter. Watari knew those previous few days were the longest he'd gone without a constant flow of sugar in his blood stream and he'd expect the platter to be licked clean by the time he returned.

She sat there watching him as he started with the strawberries. Licking the whipped cream clear of its surface and then popping it in his mouth with a devilish grin. Mishca had to admit, watching him eat sweets was like watching an affair unfold right before her eyes, the way his lips parted and his tongue glided over the pinkish red matter, the way he enveloped it in his mouth and shut his eyes, savoring every second of the taste before he started all over again with a new strawberry. It made her crave his lips, badly. But that was out of the question, especially after the reveal of such sensitive information. He wouldn't speak to her, let alone kiss her. She regretted ever refusing him now.

She figured after the few days of silence between them, it was a good time to try to talk to him, to try and re-break the ice. Only problem was, she didn't know what to say, so she settled for whatever came to her mind after she was finished obsessing over his lips. "Screw Kira, you're going to give yourself a heart attack with all those sweets… I mean, don't you think that's enough already?"

L didn't even bother to look up at her, he was too disappointed – in her because of falling for such a horrid monster and hiding it from him, and even more so in himself for not seeing her character flaws from the start. He had been blinded, L _never_ got blinded. L _never_ did a lot of things… showing emotion, assuming, letting himself fall _in love_? For some reason this girl pulled all those things out of him, and he hated it now. How could the greatest detective of the century let some _girl_ affect him like this? His disappointment quickly transformed into disgust and rage.

Even with a mouth puffed full of strawberry, the repulsion is his voice was crystal clear. "None of it will be enough to vanquish the bitter taste of deceit and betrayal..."

Her mouth dropped slightly, the words reaching the nerve endings in her brain like a ton of bricks. The words confirmed her dreaded theory - he regretted everything, every word, every touch, every kiss – it all meant nothing now. After she had decided to let herself go further... to get closer… it meant nothing… _nothing_. She raised a hand to her temple and rubbed, trying to massage away the headache that was soon to follow.

She stared blankly at the wall, his response hurt – yes she had been deceitful, but only in an effort to protect _him_, she could understand being called deceitful, but a betrayer? No, not her, that was impossible. She would never betray him, her loyalty to him was unwavering – even when she hadn't known him she was loyal – it was always his side she fought for. The fact that he felt betrayed by her was enough to make her stomach turn.

When she didn't snap back like he had expected, L turned his head to face her. She was staring at the wall blankly like a zombie, her glazed over eyes glinting in the room's light. His cold demeanor softened slightly as the war between his mind and heart raged inside of him. Even though he tried to suppress any feelings for her, they were desperately hanging on to him with no chance of him escaping. He'd never forgive her for being with B, but that didn't stop his heart from screaming at him every chance it got, yelling at him to suck it up and love her anyway.

L's eyes followed as she stood slowly from her seat, her eyes not focusing on anything besides the floor below her. He watched as she slowly and quietly walked passed him, and then turned in his chair to watch her as she left the room entirely. He was lost for words. 'What is the meaning of that?' He expected a retort from her, a comeback, hell even a rolling of the eyes or an exaggerated sigh – but there was nothing.

He twirled his chair back around so he'd face his computers and watched her through the cameras as she made her way back to her apartment. Once she finally entered her apartment she ran her fingers through her long brown hair and walked towards her balcony. His eyes widened as he watched her climb up onto the balcony's fence, the wind blowing her hair around her fiercely, and her shirt rippling under the wind's pressure. He had seen her do this before and he hated it. His heart raced as he watched her feet move along the edge, it was too close for him, too easy, just one slip and he'd lose her forever. Wait, did he really still want her? He didn't know. He watched with bated breath as he nervously bit his fingernails. He didn't tear away his eyes from the screen when he heard the door behind him open. He saw Watari out of the corner of his eye – picking up after his mess of sweets.

"Dear god what is she doing?" Watari exclaimed when he saw the screen.

"Wreaking havoc on my nerves." L regretted blurting out.

"Then go to her. Resolve this."

"No, I won't risk the chance of scaring her; it will increase the probability of her falling."

"That's not what I'm talking about Ryuzaki. B –"

"There's nothing to talk about Watari. It's done."

Watari sighed, "Don't let your hatred for one ruin your love for the other."

L rolled his eyes, he didn't want to hear it.

"Very well, but I will say this, Ryuzaki. You're writing her off without looking at the most important pieces of information. I can't tell if you are ignoring them on purpose to prevent yourself from the experience or if you are truly so blinded that you can't see beyond your rivalry. Regardless, you need to get to the bottom of it; it's hindering your performance."

At that, Watari left L sitting there wondering if he truly had missed something – she had been with B, there was nothing else to it, right? He couldn't be that blinded – that was impossible.

A few days later

L watched as Mishca was lying on the couch, up against Matsuda's side as the team discussed their next steps. Although, the two were talking amongst themselves, rather, she was attempting to show Matsuda how to see things the way she saw them. He had been bugging her for the past few days, asking for her to help him with his detective skills. L smirked slightly, knowing that Matsuda did not expect the in-depth conversation as he looked completely lost. He couldn't help but feel the longing to be in his place, with her lying beside him, but he shook the feeling away as soon as he remembered she had been B's – he had touched her, he had kissed her… she had _loved_ him… 'What a vile disgusting thing to fall in love with.' He cringed when he thought about them together, it was sickening.

Just then Watari burst into the room, "Ryuzaki!"

"What is it?" He asked.

"Sakura TV, quick… you need to see this!"

Watari pointed the remote at the flat screen television on the wall and turned it to Sakura.

Everyone's attention transferred to the television as they heard KIRA was making an announcement.

_"If this video is aired at exactly 5:59 pm on April 18th, as I requested. Then it is now 5:59 and 38, 39, 40 seconds... please switch channels to Taiyo t.v. The news anchor, Mr. Kazuhiko Hibima, will die at exactly six pm."_

"Change it," L requested. Watari changed the channel, everyone staring at the TV with wide eyes. Seconds later, the news anchor fell forward onto his desk, dead. "You have got to be kidding me!" Mishca growled.

"Hurry, switch it back!" L demanded. The TV was quickly changed back to Sakura where KIRA was continuing his message.

"Mr. Hibima has consistently referred to Kira as "evil" in his news reports. This was his punishment." the Kira voice explained. "But one demonstration alone does not serve as absolute proof. Therefore, I will present you with another…."

Mishca watched as KIRA continued his rampage, the TV clicked again and once more someone else fell dead on live television. 'This doesn't feel right' she thought to herself. She glanced over at L whose eyes were bulging and biting away at his thumb. "We have to make them stop this broadcast, we can't let him finish!"

Matsuda piped up and shouted "I'll get Sakura tv's phone number!" He tried calling, but nothing worked. "It's hopeless! Every single number I've tried in the entire station is busy!"

"My friend who works there has his cell phone turned off!" Aizawa said.

"Dammit! Then I'm going over there to make then stop it myself!" Ukita shouted as he ran to the door. "UKITA!" The team shouted after him, but he had already shut the door behind him.

"Please listen to me carefully. I do not want to kill innocent people." the Kira tape continued. "I hate evil and love justice. I do not consider the police my enemies, but my allies in my fight against evil." Mishca watched as L bit down harder on his thumb and glanced back at the tape. This was insane.

A few moments later the screen switched to a live feed from outside Sakura TV, Ukita was trying to get inside the building but the doors were locked. Suddenly, he fell to the ground grasping his chest. Mishca's eyes grew wide and gasped in shock, "How… how is that possible? L? He didn't have his name! This is different! L!" He wasn't listening because he was focused on Aizawa trying to leave.

"If you go over there you will only be killed."'

"Are you telling me to stay here and watch TV Ryuzaki?" He was furious, he had every right to be, but Mishca didn't like who his anger was directed towards.

"Well if KIRAs there that's all the more reason to go!" Aizawa continued to fight back.

"I will say it again, if you go you will be killed. Please understand."

"NO, I don't understand!" Aizawa leaped forward and clenched L's shoulder harshly. "Ukita might have been murdered by Kira! I thought we were risking our lives to arrest that bastard!"

Mishca noticed L grip his pants firmly with his fingers, digging his nails into the fabric. She knew this wasn't good, so she stepped forward and forced Aizawa away from L. It took a lot of force, but she finally got him away. "Stop it Aizawa! He's right!"

"Risking your life and doing something that could easily rob you of your life are exact opposites."

Their argument was interrupted as a vehicle crashed into Sakura TV. Moments later L was on the phone with Yagami, it seems that he was the one who broke into the station. After hanging up with Yagami, L quickly began coordinating to get other police members outside the station so that Yagami could get out safely with the secured tapes.

An hour later Yagami arrived safely back at HQ. Watari helped him sit down on the couch as he apologized to L. "I'm sorry about taking things into my own hands like that Ryuzaki… I let my emotions get the better of me."

"That's fine." L said indifferently. He didn't seem to care until Yagami presented him with the tapes and envelopes from Sakura. "Thank you Yagami-San, your efforts will not be in vain."

L quickly examined the envelopes and gave them to Aizawa to have them sent to forensics – they could only hope there would some fingerprints or DNA evidence that would be found.

Aizawa and the other team members rushed out of the room, excited with the abundance of new evidence to process and statements to take that could lead to the capture of KIRA. Finally, they had something they could use.

"Mishca, that will be all for today." L ordered as he lifted the tapes one by one into the air with his thumb and index finger, examining the exterior before handing them off to Watari to play them.

"That's all? You don't want my input on the tapes?"

"You will just be in the way. Please retire to you apartment." He said coldly.

She stood up, "In the _way_? Then what the hell am I doing here L?"

"Your assistance is required, but at a later time. You are not needed at the moment. Please leave." He said with the same amount of coldness in his voice. It wasn't that he didn't want her help, the truth of the matter was he didn't know what he wanted when it came to her, his heart and mind were waging a war inside of him and her presence would only make it worse. He just needed to work, alone.

She gritted her teeth and stomped off to her apartment, she was furious. 'Just in the way… seriously?' She entered her apartment, slamming the door behind her and landing roughly on her bed. She booted up her laptop, if she couldn't work on the KIRA case, she was going to work on another one to keep her mind off of L. Not that it would work, but she had to try.

She refused to leave her apartment the following day, she wasn't told that she was _needed_ yet, so what was the point? She knew she was being stubborn and childish, but she didn't care, he really upset her with that comment – she missed when the two would just sit up all night together going over tapes and other things about the case, but he didn't want that anymore, that much was clear.

The Next Day

Mishca was standing out on the edge of her balcony when she heard soft footsteps behind her.

"You know Mishca, I really hate when you do that." A cool, calm voice reached her ears.

She clenched her jaw and fists as she heard the same comment that B expressed coming out of L's mouth. It was depressing on all accounts.

"Please come down from there."

She shut her eyes and whispered "stop… just stop."

L was confused by the hurt in her voice, he tried to ignore it as he shoved his hands into his pockets, his gaze shifting away from her body towards the shadow of her silhouette casted below - he just wanted her safely back on the ground with him. _With him_ – he thought… he still wanted that… he still wanted _her_. Damn Watari, was he right? 'Maybe a conversation _is_ merited.' He thought, if he could just see her side, maybe _they_ were still possible, though he wasn't sure what percentage that maybe represented – although he expected it to be quite low.

"There's something I need you to examine, you can't very well do it from up there."

She turned around with a soft arrogant smile, "Oh, so I'm needed now, am I?"

"Quite." Was all he replied, trying his best not to let a smirk appear on his lips. He had to admit he loved how cocky and stubborn she was, it reminded him of himself. He watched as she jumped down back to the balcony platform and stormed past him out of the apartment. L nonchalantly walked behind her, wondering if now was a good time to broach the subject. He determined it was a poor choice of timing, and that it would have to wait.

"So what am I examining?" She asked as they were about to enter the research room.

"Light Yagami will be reviewing the tapes shortly, I'd like you to examine his reactions, pay careful attention to how he responds, both physically and verbally. But be sure to keep a good distance from him." L wanted to know her thoughts on Light, but didn't want her anywhere near KIRA – it was too close for him, like her toying with the edge of the balcony, but he needed her to do this…

The door opened and the two walked in together with Mishca biting her lower lip, this was sure going to be interesting, she thought. The team members and Light turned their attention towards them as they entered.

L spoke first in an effort to introduce his additional team member as he grabbed a lollipop from the table, "Light, I'd like you to meet –"

"MISHCA?" Light exclaimed.

L turned to face her, his eyes were wide and his jaw was visibly clenched in anger.

She let out a harsh breath and nervously replied "Heya stranger…"


	34. Chapter 33: Jealousy

Chapter 33: Jealousy

"Heya stranger…" she blurted out in a nervous, flirtatious manner. All eyes were on her, demanding an explanation. She couldn't look at the man's face beside her, all she could manage was looking downward at his hand holding onto his strawberry flavored lollipop so tightly his fingers turned red – it felt as if an atomic bomb had just went off and the smell of burning ozone was in the air. She knew this day would eventually come, although her preference was at a later time, 'time to improvise' she thought.

"Wait, she knows him?" Matsuda whispered to Aizawa. "It would appear so… yet another dishonest _great_ detective among us. What else is she hiding?"

"How do you know my son?" Mr. Yagami questioned, "and why are we just finding out, in this manner?"

"Yes, I am quite curious to know this information as well, please, by all means Mishca, explain yourself." L said monotonously as he approached her, close enough to her ear that his soft, angry whisper could be heard only by her "_as you seem to be keeping every important detail from me_."

She shrugged off his comment, and returned her focus back to Light as she began walking towards him with a devilish grin.

Light stood up from the couch and smiled, enjoying the fact that he would get to toy with everyone.

"It's so good to see you again, Mishca, although I can't say that I'm too pleased that you were investigating me at the time of our first date. "He giggled, "I suppose you can make it up to me by going to dinner with me, maybe we can even catch a movie."

"Date?" Matsuda exclaimed excitedly. "Oh wow, I see it now, you guys would make such a great couple!"

"Matsuda!" Mr. Yagami yelled as L was forcing all of his anger into clenching his teeth right down on his defenseless lollipop.

Mishca could see that Light was grinning manically. She saw the gears running in his head – and she couldn't help but smile back, a light bulb flashing ever so brightly in her mind. 'This… could be useful…dangerous…. But useful…' she thought to herself 'in more ways than I imagined…'

"Oh, come on now Light, you have to be a little flattered that I just HAD to see what all the fuss was about you after investigating you for so long – you can't be that hurt, you're Light Yagami after all."

Light laughed through his grin as Mischa walked slowly towards him, L's gaze followed her every move.

Mishca placed a hand on Light's arm before sitting down on the couch. A loud crack could be heard across the room and she looked up just in time to see L rubbing his cheek before throwing his half eaten lollipop in the trash below him, landing with a loud thunk. She couldn't help but think that he probably broke his teeth with that maneuver.

"I think that's enough prying into their personal lives for now – we should begin, there are more important matters at hand than who my son has dated." Mr. Yagami snapped, giving Light and Mishca a disapproving look.

"_Dating_, if I get my way…." Light corrected his father and then looked at Mischa as he sat down next to her and placed a hand on her thigh "and I will."

L cleared his throat as he found a place behind her to stand, eying the location of Light's hand. L clenched his right hand into a fist, digging his bitten nails into his palm. It took everything L had to tolerate Light touching her in such an intimate way. 'What is she thinking, anyway? Has she gone completely mad?' His thoughts were interrupted as her soft voice replied, "We'll see" followed with a small chuckle. This flirtatious behavior had to be stopped – it was becoming unbearable.

"Alright… now, how about we get right down to things? Would you take a look at the evidence we've gathered and the unreleased tape that was sent to the T.V. station? Understand that taking the documents out of this room or making notes is prohibited." L snapped.

"Of course." Light replied

L kept his composure the best he could, but his mind was racing trying to connect the dots. He had no idea what she was actually doing with Light. If this was a tactic to get close to KIRA or if she was genuinely interested in him. Either way, he aimed to put an end to it.

Mishca's attention was split between watching the tapes and Light, every so often she would glance up at L above her to find his eyes quickly dart back to Light. He had been watching her instead, 'maybe all isn't lost… thanks Light.' She thought, smiling privately to herself that she had made him at least a little jealous with their game.

After Light finished watching the tapes, he stood and voiced his opinion of a second KIRA. After confirming his theory, L proposed to send a KIRA video of their own, using Light playing the role of KIRA.

"That shouldn't be hard for you, Light." Mishca stated harshly as she stood from the couch. Light turned around from where he stood and gave her a cold glare as L eyed her quizzically, 'So you _are_ just doing this to get close to KIRA? He wondered. But if you're going to attack, Mishca you need to pick one method, not two –' he watched as she walked towards the opposite wall, furious that he wasn't exactly sure of what she was doing – then again, that wasn't anything new. He watched a moment more as she turned her body slightly and brushed her hand through her hair, she looked so preoccupied, 'what is it that holds her mind so captivated?' he wondered.

It didn't take long for Light to finish his Kira speech, L looked it over quickly and his eyes widened a tad. 'He actually went there…' he thought.

"It's very well done, but… if we don't take out this "but you can kill L part… I'll die."

Mishca turned around at the mention of L's demise and glared harshly at the back of Light's head as it shook from his laughter, his perfect hair seeming to fall right back into place. "I guess I took it too far, if I was the real KIRA, wouldn't I want you dead? Anyway, please feel free to change it to whatever you see fit."

After the script had been corrected to omit L's demise, it was aired as planned in 10 minute spans every hour after seven pm. After watching the first airing on the television, the team members retired either to their apartment quarters or back to their homes for the night. There was no telling when the other KIRA would make a move.

Before leaving, Light took Mishca aside and placed his hand on the wall she was leaning up against. L restrained himself, but from his view it looked to be an intimate conversation, as Light's head and lips were rather close to hers –he wanted nothing more than to utilize his capoeira skills at that point and take Light's head out with his foot.

"Still suspect me of being Kira?" he asked quietly.

"Always." Was all that she replied.

"I've never met a woman as stubborn as you."

"I've never met a man as arrogant as you."

His lips curled into a wide smirk, "Admit it, you like this banter between us, don't you?"

She scoffed at this, "You may think whatever you wish."

"And what is it that you think?"

"Of what exactly?"

"Kira. You never did tell me, not fully anyway, you were far too busy sticking me with the café bill and humiliating me in public."

L couldn't make out the words they were speaking, and he couldn't get much closer without it being awkwardly obvious. His heart fell as she laughed whole heartedly at something Light had said, was it just an attack method or was she truly attracted to him? The uncertainty bothered him more than he dare admit.

"Wow, not only are you arrogant, but you want your date to pick up the tab too?"

"Only joking… but it was not a pleasant date, you can at least indulge me on one thought of Kira, it's only fair, since you think that it's me."

"…. He wants to be a god so badly… his superiority complex makes me sick."

"Humans have always wanted to be godlike, just look at our history."

"Defending Kira are we?"

"It is merely a fact."

"Still…He cares not for justice, for what's right and wrong, only that who he considers scum to be removed, as if scrapped off of the bottom of his shoe. That's not godlike."

"What do you find godlike then?" He asked as they moved to the door.

L didn't think his heart could sink any further until he watched Mishca wrap her arm around Light's neck, pulling herself up onto her tip toes and whisper something in his ear. He watched as Light's lips formed a smile as she placed a sole kiss on his cheek before removing herself from him and disappearing through the door leaving Light behind.

"You don't come across a woman like that every day." Light muttered as he too left the room, hot on her heels.

"No, you most certainly do not." L agreed under his breath, seething with jealousy.

Light jogged up to catch Mishca, "…A man is a little thing while he works by and for himself; but when he gives voice to the rules of love and justice, he is godlike…. So are you implying that you do want to date me?"

Mishca stopped, "Your arrogance is unbelievable. That's not what I meant by that"

"Then what exactly do you mean? You believe I am KIRA, so hypothetically if that were actually true, I wouldn't be working for myself, I would be working for the world and I would have nothing but justice in mind, so I would only be missing one thing, which implies you are interested in filling that missing piece."

"Not even close, Light. I thought you were supposed to be smart?" She retorted without even turning around or stopping. "Rules – boundaries, ethics, they are beneath Kira, he doesn't feel that he needs to be constrained by those things, nor is he even capable of such a complex emotion of love. He is an unforgiving plague on this world that must be eradicated."

"Eradicated? So how does that make you any better than KIRA? You judge him as he judges others. You are the _same_." He said through gritted teeth as he grabbed her wrist.

She spun around to face him, "Action"

"What?"

"Action is what makes us different. I know better that I alone cannot judge as I am biased – that's for our legal syst-"

She could hear the swooshing sound of the door behind her, "Mishca" came L's voice from down the hallway.

"You are so frustrating" Light pulled her closer, and lowered his voice as he inched his face closer.

"We're not quite finished yet." She could tell L was walking towards her by the change in the echo.

"…Nearly impossible" Light finished just before he leaned in … and quickly recoiled as L became visible.

L stopped a few feet away and watched as Light moved away from her, he wasn't quite sure what he had just interrupted.  
>"I guess I'll be going now, we'll finish this debate some other time. Good bye." Light said abruptly and walked away.<p>

L fiddled with his pants pocket until he was sure Light had gone, and walked passed Mishca, signaling her to follow.

L attempted to push aside the brewing emotional explosion, as he so often had to do, and got right down to business. "So, what did you observe?" He asked as they made their way upstairs to her apartment.

"I'm sorry?" Mishca replied, she was preoccupied with the game her and Light were playing that she wasn't quite sure what L was talking about.

"You had one job to do today – I'd like to be informed of the results."

"Oh, right. Sorry…. He was rigid when the tapes played, almost like he was uncomfortable. But that is understandable with the pressure he was under. His reaction was blunt and to the point. He didn't hold back in his response to you, nor in the script you had him write. Although he wrote that KIRA could kill you, nothing he revealed today can be used to determine his guilt. There's simply not enough to go on – but this is all information you are already aware of."

"Yes, however I am curious about the information I was not aware of before today. How long have you been fraternizing with Light?" He asked as they entered the apartment.

"Not that long, I just –"

"Your dishonesty nearly destroyed today's objective!" He lashed out, "You do realize you've put yourself in danger and have undermined me all at once. I don't care if this is some tactic of yours, or if you really do have feelings for Light- I demand that you cease immediately. What you have done is beyond inappropriate and unacceptable, I will not have it under my roof!"

His temper shook her, he knew he would be angry but she'd never heard him raise his voice like this before. "I'm making progress, I could gain valub –"

"Just what the hell were you thinking, Mishca? You're going to get yourself killed! I told you to keep as far away as possible, you completely disregarded my orders!"

"… I'm not some lackey that is going to blindly follow orders L. You knew that from the beginning, and why is it okay for you to put yourself at risk but not me! If anything I've helped get the target off of you, at least for a little while. Time is dwindling L, what I've done may just give you a little more time to get what you need while the focus is on me. Please don't waste it because you're angry with me…"

L breathed heavily, his mind reeling, retreating back to the doorway. "I don't think you fully understand what you've done. I don't understand -Why would you sacrifice yourself like this?" He tried to hide his emotion, but towards the end his voice faltered a bit, staying any longer and his emotions would surely give him away.

"I want to catch KIRA just as bad as you do – this will give you more of a chance. You'll see." She turned around but he was already gone.


End file.
